The Tale of a Death Eater
by Leukhendian
Summary: When the Dark Lord returned to power, he searched for new followers and wished to regain what had been lost. But did all of his Death Eaters join him of free will...?
1. Marked by Darkness 1

**Disclaimer:** Harry Potter belongs to the wonderful J.K. Rowling. I only own Iris Halither (name and character) and all the other stuff and OCs.

**Background:** I've read the books and seen the movies more than once, plus the two extra lexicons 'Fantastic Beasts & Where to Find Them' and 'Quidditch Through the Ages'. Oh, and the Harry Potter Lexicon website has assisted me a lot as well.

**Summary:** In the dark times when the Dark Lord returned to power, he searched for new followers and wished to regain what had been lost. But did all of his Death Eaters join him of free will? Iris Halither looks back and tells her tale, and discovers a horrible truth about herself...

**Note:** The story is divided into chapters, the chapters shaped into parts. One part is seven chapters, no matter the lengths of those. Some chapters are short, some are long. That's how they were written.

**-**

**Th****e Tale of a Death Eater  
Part I: Marked by Darkness  
Chapter 1**

**-**

"Damn English summers," I muttered under my breath as I rubbed my hands together to get a bit of warmth. I knew it wasn't safe to be outside, but I didn't have any choice. I was homeless and had grown up in a children's home in London. But I hadn't always stayed there. They took me in when my mother died when I was about seven or eight - I don't remember. I had always known I was a witch. I didn't tell anyone though; they'd think I was mad.

I didn't know any other witches or wizards... until I got to Hogwarts. I was sorted into Ravenclaw, though I have no idea why. I've never been good with magic. Some would call me a Squib. But I'm quite good at making potions. Maybe I should have been Slytherin? No, I don't have the qualifications to be a Slytherin. But that's not what I was supposed to tell you...

No one wanted to be my friend. They thought I was strange. I was the girl whose mother had died under odd circumstances. No one actually knew how she died. She was pretty young, so she must have been sick. Or maybe someone poisoned her; no one knew. She'd lived with me in a Muggle area, and it was Muggles that found me crying, clutching her pale, lifeless hand. At the time I didn't know she was dead. I thought she was... asleep...

I sneezed as the rain came down harder. I was standing inside a phone box; in fact, I was only a few blocks away from the Leaky Cauldron. But I didn't want to draw attention to myself in the dark London - especially not after the Dark Lord returned. And the Dementors...

I shuddered at the thought of _them_. I had no wish of meeting one. I just stood there, hopefully catching my death. I looked at the buildings to my left and right. Old stores, most of them shut down long ago. I blinked and opened the door of the phone box, glancing out. I had become all jittery and nervous since the incident with the Brockdale Bridge. Even though I worked at the Ministry of Magic I didn't feel safe. Not even working as a secretary in the Aurors' department helped the eerie feeling I had.

Sighing deeply I walked out of the phone box as the rain ceased. I pulled my cloak closer about me, hid my long dark-blonde hair under my hood and strolled down the dark streets. I smiled a bit and decided to stop by Amelia's place. Maybe she'd care to drink some tea with me. After all, we were friends - and colleagues too. She probably wouldn't mind a visit.

I looked at the door to her house where she lived with her niece. The small metal-sign glinted down at me:

_Amelia and Susan Bones_

I knocked on the door a couple of times and waited. No response. I tried a few more times with the same result. Furrowing my brows I walked towards the neighbour's house. He was a friend of Amelia's, so she visited time to time. I knocked and looked through the small window in the door. "Hello?" I called and knocked again. "Anybody there?" I tried to pull down the doorknob and was surprised to find the door unlocked. Thoughts coursed through my head and I hoped nothing bad had happened.

I entered a long dark hall, glancing around. "Hello?" I called, though not so loudly. I didn't want to bring too much attention to myself - at least not if something had happened to Amelia and Mr. Fatigue.

"Amelia? You there?"

I heard something crash upstairs. My heart started pounding faster and faster each second. God, what if it was Death Eaters? Would they kill me if they saw me? And could Amelia be...?

The crash of glass being broken reached my ears. _Upstairs_...

In haste I ran up the stair to the first floor and looked around. "Amelia?" I called again. No answer. I heard shouting from one of the rooms further down the corridor and started towards it. Then it stopped. And laughter, oh, so deep a laughter of pain and darkness, a laughter that fed upon destruction and suffering. I held my breath and concentrated hard. "Okay. I can do this. I've done it once," I muttered nervously. "_Please_ don't let me lose an ear..."

Then I Apparated inside the room and came face-to-face with pure horror. I gasped and stumbled several steps, bumping into the wall behind me. Before me was the lifeless body of Amelia Bones, her face white and terror-stricken. I took a deep breath and tried to calm my nerves. I managed to lift my gaze off of Amelia and traced upwards, ending upon two red slits.

...I froze. I simply froze and didn't move one inch. The narrow slits became narrower, and a small smile of either annoyance, interest or both appeared on the face of the very most feared man on earth, the man whose name we do not speak. He nodded shortly at me and then Disapparated, leaving me in a shocked, scared, angry, revolted, sad state...

I quickly Apparated to the street, running away from the house which now had the Dark Mark floating above it in a poisonous, green colour. I didn't know what to do. I didn't know who to tell, or if I _should_ tell anyone what I'd seen. Not that it would help the busy Ministry. Amelia Bones was dead, and I _almost_ witnessed her murder. One question kept repeating itself in my head, terrifying me to bits...

_Would they look for me now_...?

-

"How could I be so _stupid_?" I kept asking myself out loud on the way to one of the only places I hoped to be safe. "Ugh, I must be the dumbest person in all Britain... damn it..."

I wasn't certain if the Leaky Cauldron would be a safe place to stay, but I had to try. I didn't have many other choices. As long as it was a place where there would be many people I would be safe enough. You can imagine my stunned face when I entered the completely empty inn. Tom himself didn't look too good.

"Do you want a room, Miss Halither?" he asked me, a bit disappointed it wasn't a paying customer (he was one of my only friends and knew my economy), scrambling out from his place by the bar.

"Eh, yes please," I said walking towards one of the tables, helping myself getting a chair down from its place on top of the table. "How come there are no customers?" I asked, furrowing my eyebrows in wonder.

"They're all too scared to move outside their homes. And the Dementors..." Tom shuddered unpleasantly.

"I see. So business is not going well?"

"No, not well at all. I barely get one costumer a week when before it was _hundreds_!" he said, waving his hands in the air.

I sighed and closed my eyes gratefully. Finally some rest inside the warmth. But even in my relaxing state the body of my dead friend haunted me. I couldn't stop thinking about Amelia's murder. It was so disturbing. It made me realise that anyone could be next. But possibly I couldn't be important enough? I was just a secretary in the Ministry, no big deal...

"I'm going to bed, Tom," I said and rubbed my eyes tiredly.

"Very well. Just take room 11," he said and walked behind the bar again, threw the key to me and started cleaning some glasses.

I walked up the stair to get to the first floor where the rooms were and unlocked the door to my room. "_Finally_ a real bed," I groaned and threw myself on top of it, falling asleep instantly.

-

The following day I strode down Diagon Alley. A sad sight. Poor Mr. Ollivander and Florean Fortescue. Wonder what happened to them, and why they had to leave. Their stores were completely shut down.

I recall Professor Flitwick paid for my wand at Ollivander's, since I couldn't afford one. Every witch and wizard needs a wand. It's simply unthinkable not to have one.

I shook my head sadly as I walked past the deserted stores. Wanted Death Eaters smirked, scowled and grinned at me from the many posters everywhere. I wondered how long they could keep the ones they had captured in Azkaban now the Dementors had joined the Dark Lord. Disaster. Everything was a pure disaster. At least they'd soon choose a new Minister. Fudge was certainly losing his grip. No one respected him anymore with all the wrong decisions he had taken and the lies he had told.

I could care less, actually. I had always known Fudge was a wrong choice. He just lived in this imaginary world where everything was as he wanted it to be. Reality must be quite a shock after such a long time in illusion. What a shame.

A couple of wizards rushed past me and ran towards Gringotts. From what I knew it was quite difficult to get your money now - even more difficult than it already was. Well, not for me. The only money I had I carried in my pockets. So yes, it wasn't very much. But I managed... sort of...

After less than an hour I returned to the Leaky Cauldron. "I think I'll go have a look around, Tom," I said and walked towards the door.

"You watch out for them darn Dementors, Miss Halither," he said with a grave expression.

I nodded and exited the inn.

There were neither cars nor people. The Death Eaters and the Dementors both infected the Wizarding people as well as the Muggles. Though, the Muggles couldn't see the Dementors. What a horrible feeling it must be to have your soul taken by a creature you can't even see.

I didn't really watch where I was going as I walked down Charing Cross Road. It was like my feet just carried me away to some random place, like I had no control at all. Again Amelia Bones entered my mind. What of Susan, her niece? What would become of her? And who would take Amelia's place at the Ministry? As I said, she was a _very_ gifted witch. And she was so kind but stern at the same time. No one could catch her off guard. But why had the Dark Lord killed her - and in person even? Sure, she was very, very clever and knew many things. Maybe he wanted her to tell him something...?

I looked up as a sharp light flashed over the sky. There were dark clouds, and sure enough the crash of thunder bellowed throughout the city after half a minute. "Great," I muttered as the rain poured down again. I walked into a dark alley where there was a bit of shelter.

I got startled, though, when something crashed behind me. I turned around and saw that a container had been knocked over. Now, you certainly must know that containers are quite _heavy_. Naturally, I got nervous and kept looking over my shoulder to see if someone was there. I walked over to the container and squat down. "What the--" I said and picked up an old newspaper. I shrugged and stood up. Just as I did a pair of arms tightened round my chest, which caused all air to leave my lungs. "Let... go of... me!" I breathed and struggled against whoever it was. I managed to elbow the person and run towards the only exit of the alley, only to fall to the ground, tied up by a Binding Spell. I opened my mouth to scream--

"_Silencio_!"

My mouth kept moving, but no words came out. But I already knew... Death Eaters...

-

**Author's n****ote:** I hope you enjoyed the first bit of Iris' tale. Don't forget, reviewers rock!


	2. Marked by Darkness 2

**Disclaimer:** See the first chapter.

**Background:** See the first chapter.

**Summary:** In the dark times when the Dark Lord returned to power, he searched for new followers and wished to regain what had been lost. But did all of his Death Eaters join him of free will? Iris Halither looks back and tells her tale, and discovers a horrible truth about herself...

**Note:** The story is divided into chapters, the chapters shaped into parts. One part is seven chapters, no matter the lengths of those. Some chapters are short, some are long. That's how they were written.

**-**

**Th****e Tale of a Death Eater  
Part I: Marked by Darkness  
Chapter 2**

**-**

"Well, what do we have here?" came a raspy voice from above me.

I tried to see who was talking, but the ropes prevented me from doing anything but lift my head, and that wasn't enough to get a look. The man leaned down in front of me and turned his head sideways mockingly.

"Don't yer think we should get moving?" another man said. Apparently there was more than one. In fact, I realised, there was about four or five. There could've been more, but it was dark, and my vision wasn't very wide in my current position.

"Oh, shut it, Jugson. What, you think Dumbledore'll just come walking down the bloody street?" the man in front of me hissed.

"Naw, I jus--"

"You think too much. It's not good for you..."

I had stopped crying for help as it was useless when they had cast Silencio at me. It was just a waste of precious energy.

One of the Death Eaters put two fingers under my chin and lifted my head up forcefully, making me wince as the ropes were bound so tightly round my body it hurt like hell.

"What's a young lady doing out so late on her own, I wonder. Ain't got any _prince_ at home, love?" he taunted. I'd love to reply him in my _best_ manner, but as it was I had no voice. I had to manage with giving him a very dirty look.

"No? Shame. 'Cause then you wouldn't have met us fine gentlemen. Well, might as well see if you're any use. You don't look very important in _those robes_," he screwed up his face in disgust, "but maybe the Dark Lord knows any purpose for you. Ha! Though I doubt it. If you're lucky you won't be killed. I'd gladly do it... with a bit of teasing first, o'course." The other men chuckled.

The bare thought of seeing the Dark Lord again made me freeze from the inside and out. It was not because of the cold, but of fear. I was so terrified I barely noticed when a man grabbed me tightly and Disapparated with me, and I barely even noticed the uncomfortable feeling of being in his arms and the nauseous feeling of Apparition.

-

My feet hit massive ground again and I would most likely have stumbled if the man hadn't been holding me.

"Home sweet home," one of the other men said, walking towards a door.

The room we entered looked like the Potions classroom at Hogwarts: Bare stonewalls covered by bookshelves with different sorts of potions and ingredients. There were no windows in the room, only two doors - the one we had entered through and another in the opposite end of the room. In the centre of the room there was a long table with chairs around it. I nearly gasped as I looked around more closely. There were very rare potions ingredients, some of which I didn't know.

"Snape!" the Death Eater holding me shouted.

Not a second later the door burst open, and there stood the Potions Master surrounded by billowing black robes.

"_What_... is it?" Snape said in a quite annoyed tone. His eyes slowly moved towards me. Snape's eyebrows rose slowly when our eyes met. "Iris Halither. What an unpleasant surprise on my otherwise bright day," he said.

"You know her?"

"Of course I know her, Dolohov. She went to Hogwarts... like you and everybody else in this room. Though, I'm surprised she even got through her first year. High grades in Potions and poor grades in every other class. Isn't that right, Halither?" Of course, I couldn't reply.

"Are you saying she's a _Squib_?" Dolohov said, emphasising the last word with disgust.

"Indeed," Snape said with a small smile playing at the corners of his mouth.

Snape had called me a Squib during my entire stay at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. You'd think he would actually have had a _bit_ of respect for me, seeing as I was the best in his class, _and_ that I was a pure-blood. The only reason he adored to taunt me was that Potions was the _only_ subject I was good at. He used to make comments about 'why I carried a useless stick with me' and 'how come I wasn't related to Filch'.

But I didn't think about any of that. I just stared at the Professor with my mouth slightly agape. Why had he returned to the Dark Lord's side when he had so much respect for Albus Dumbledore? I couldn't and wouldn't believe it.

"Mulciber, go find a room for Halither. I'll tell the Dark Lord," Dolohov said and 'handed me over' to Mulciber, who removed the ropes on my legs so I could walk, and then Dolohov walked out through the door Snape came from.

"Come on," Mulciber said and pushed me forwards, causing me to stumble. A Death Eater behind me grunted with amusement. Mulciber grabbed my right shoulder tightly and _guided_ me towards the door. As we passed Snape I looked up at him, Snape returning my gaze with a scowl.


	3. Marked by Darkness 3

**Disclaimer:** See the first chapter.

**Background:** See the first chapter.

**Summary:** In the dark times when the Dark Lord returned to power, he searched for new followers and wished to regain what had been lost. But did all of his Death Eaters join him of free will? Iris Halither looks back and tells her tale, and discovers a horrible truth about herself...

**Note:** The story is divided into chapters, the chapters shaped into parts. One part is seven chapters, no matter the lengths of those. Some chapters are short, some are long. That's how they were written.

**-**

**Th****e Tale of a Death Eater  
Part I: Marked by Darkness  
Chapter 3**

**-**

The room, I was so elegantly escorted to, had bare stonewalls and a dusty wooden floor wearing a tattered carpet. The only furniture in the room was an old, moth-eaten bed from the medieval and a small wooden wardrobe.

Mulciber pushed me inside the room, summoned my wand from my pocket and left, of course locking the door after him. I sighed and walked towards the bed, lying flat across it. Could it get any worse? The answer was yes. The _real_ question was... when?

I awaited what was to come, the only sound being the steady yet fast rhythm of my heart. It was a calming feeling. The silence before the storm, I suppose. I feared meeting those red eyes again... those inhumane eyes... I've never seen the like in my life. They reminded me of snake-eyes. In fact, he resembled one. He seemed to have no nose, nostrils as thin as those of a serpent. His mouth was lipless, making him look even less human when he would smile. And yet, I had only had that one, short glance at him. This time would be much worse. If I was lucky I'd die from fear before the Death Eaters returned to my room.

All I could do was to wait... and wait... and wait...

-

I don't know how long time had passed when I finally heard footsteps outside the door. Slow, dragging footsteps. I sat up as much as I could when the door was unlocked and a small man entered. He wore a black robe but looked nothing like the others. He was crouched and bore much resemblance to a rat. The Death Eater walked towards me and grabbed a hold of some of the loose ropes that bound me, pulling me to my feet. He was somewhat shorter than I, the top of his head his head reaching my chin.

"Hello," he said in a squeaky voice with a lob-sided grin, making my mouth twitch in disgust.

"What's your problem?" I tried to say, but was reminded that I couldn't speak when no words came out.

The small man pulled me along and brought me through several corridors. What was this place? The walls seemed to be made of stone. No, they weren't stonewalls like the ones in my _adorable_ room. They were actually _made_ of rock, like the building had been carved inside a cave of a sort.

I looked around as we kept walking, searching for a weak spot if escape should ever become possible. But I sighed in defeat when I could see none. The Death Eater stopped in front of a stone-door. He lifted his left hand and knocked heavily three times. The door opened showing another Death Eater on the other side. The small man guided me inside the room and pushed me forward so I almost fell to my knees of surprise.

There hung enchanted torches on the walls of the grand cave, giving the surroundings a blue glow. I gulped several times when I found myself encircled by Death Eaters. I rubbed my wrists, realising the ropes were gone. I stood up, slowly gaining control of my stiff limbs. I lifted my hands up to my face seeing the blue and purple marks where the ropes had been.

"_Welcome to my humble home_, _Halither_," a hoarse voice spoke, echoing all around me.

I spun around but couldn't find the source of the voice. One of the Death Eaters suddenly stepped out of the circle. I took a step backwards and thrust my hand into my pocket, remembering I didn't have my wand. The Death Eaters chuckled at my distress as I looked to and fro frantically, searching for a way out. A cold laughter cut through the others, coming from the man in front of me. He pulled down his hood, and once again my eyes were forced upon those red, beaming ones.

The Dark Lord walked closer to me, smiling. My lips were getting dry from not speaking for so long and I licked them nervously. The Dark Lord pointed his wand towards me, removing the Silencing Charm with a soundless spell. "What do you want with me?" I immediately burst out.

He merely smiled at me and approached so he was soon directly in front of me. "You were a friend of Amelia Bones," he said, not answering the question.

"And so what?" I asked, my eyes looking anywhere but at him.

"You miss her, don't you? It must have hurt to watch someone dear pass away..."

"She didn't pass away! You murdered her!" I screamed, now looking into his eyes.

Laughter... he _actually_ laughed at me. "And I enjoyed it..."

I didn't know what to reply. My breath became quicker as my eyes flicked to and fro between the many Death Eaters watching me. After a life of remaining unnoticed it was a difference I didn't like, not one bit. I closed my eyes for a short moment, hoping it would all be gone once I opened them.

I got startled when I felt a cold hand on my left wrist and opened my eyes to gaze into those of intense red. I held my breath, dreading to be so close to him, so near to what I feared to come - the curse of my life.

I was certain the Dark Lord could feel my racing pulse, the unbroken pumping rhythm in my veins. With a sharp breath I withdrew my arm and turned away from him, aware of the daggers that were shot at me through glaring eyes.

"You really think you can return to your normal life _now_, Halither?" that hoarse voice said. I kept walking. "What do you expect to find? I know about your little 'Auror-job'. It doesn't pay very well, does it? No wonder you don't even have a home..." I shut my eyes closed, trying to ignore him. "And how would you even be able to live on, knowing I'm keeping an eye on your doings? What would happen to your future husband, if ever such luck, if I should find that you've told him too much? Think about the future, Halither. You must always look ahead and be prepared."

He walked towards me ever-so-slowly, not moving his eyes from my frozen form. He stopped when he was about a hand's breadth away from me. "I can make you rich, Halither. Just imagine - your own house, husband and kids. A good job, a career with good money to earn..." I blinked and looked at the floor.

"That's what you want, isn't it? A real life with a home and a family to celebrate an otherwise very lonely Christmas, Halloween and Easter? You can't deny what your heart desires, Halither: Power, glory, happiness... love? I can make you powerful, Halither, for no matter how much you deny yourself you will always seek out power, and you know it. But that's not all..." he said, his voice barely above a whisper. He grabbed my wrist tightly, making me look up at him. Then he put the tip of his wand against my temple. I drew in a sharp breath as memories flashed through my mind.

_I was holding a pale, limp hand, clutching onto it with dear life. "Mummy? Mummy, please wake up, please..." I uttered with tears down my cheeks. A middle-aged man came and lifted me up, carrying me away. "No! I want my Mummy! Put me down! Put me down!"_

_Third year at Hogwarts. I recogni__sed the scene immediately. It was Christmas, and like the two previous years I celebrated the holiday at Hogwarts. The 13 years old me was watching the other Ravenclaws as they opened their many gifts from their parents, uncles, aunts... And I just sat there, clutching the pair of socks I had gotten from the orphanage I lived in. That's what I got every year - a new pair of socks or an ugly but warm sweater..._

_Fifth year at Hogwarts. I was sitting in a window in the common room, looking at a tattered letter. That day made my heart fall apart; the day when I got truly alone. I couldn't exactly remember what the letter said, still can't, but as I saw the 15 years old in the memory, I remembered the sorrow I had felt.__ The letter was from someone working in the Ministry, some random person I suppose. It said that my father, who was an Auror, had been found dead, possibly killed by a vampire. Though my father never claimed his right as a parent when he left my mother - I was only a small child when that happened - I had still loved him. He was an explorer as well as an Auror, and that was what had most space in his heart. Yet, the news of his death had made me sink deeper into grief..._

_Old Professor McGonagall's disappointments in my magical skills..._

_The low grades at the NEWTs..._

_My failures at the Auror training course..._

_The shame of not being able to pay for simple things like a cup of coffee..._

_The biting cold nights sleeping under a tree in some random park..._

_The loneliness of having no family..._

_The embarrassment of being pitied..._

"STOP!" I screamed and clutched my head. My stomach churned as I fell to my knees, pitying myself. I didn't want to cry... but cry I did.

"Not only can I make you rich and powerful, Halither... Most of all, I can make you forget. Forget the pain and the memories you've lived with all of your life. You want to get rid of them, don't you? You want it all to go away?" the Dark Lord sneered.

I looked up at him through tear-glazed eyes. "Yes..." I said in a wavering voice. "No more... no more..."

"Then join me..." he said with a manic glint in his eyes.

I got to my feet, though my legs were shaking terribly.

"Now," he said, pulling up my sleeve, "this will hurt a bit. Or maybe a lot..." The Death Eaters chuckled. I felt dizzy but pushed the nauseous feeling away. The Dark Lord touched my left forearm gently with his wand. "_Morsmordre_!"

As the spell burned into my skin I screamed and clutched my arm in pain, falling to the ground once again. I breathed heavily and removed my hand to look at the mark: A skull with a serpent slithering through its mouth.

"Now, Iris Halither... _Now_ you are mine..."


	4. Marked by Darkness 4

**Disclaimer:** See the first chapter.

**Background:** See the first chapter.

**Summary:** In the dark times when the Dark Lord returned to power, he searched for new followers and wished to regain what had been lost. But did all of his Death Eaters join him of free will? Iris Halither looks back and tells her tale, and discovers a horrible truth about herself...

**Note:** The story is divided into chapters, the chapters shaped into parts. One part is seven chapters, no matter the lengths of those. Some chapters are short, some are long. That's how they were written.

**-**

**The Tale of a Death Eater  
Part I: ****Marked by Darkness  
Chapter 4**

**-**

I woke up early Saturday morning. A few days had passed since I was marked. By then I knew the most of the Death Eaters' names (the ones that were around, anyway). I was one of the only ones who slept at the Headquarters, as I called it. The most Death Eaters went home to their wives, girlfriends, husbands and whatnot.

But I never felt at ease in my so-called room. There was no lock, you see. Of course there are locking spells, but... well...

I got out of bed and wore my new black robes, pulling my Death Eater cloak on. With a sigh I placed my white mask in my inner pocket, glancing shortly at it.

There had been no sight of the Dark Lord since the ceremony, and Wormtail (the awkward man that had brought me to the cave where I had been marked) had been sent to stay at Severus Snape's place to assist him.

I entered the corridor, groaning as I put a hand to my neck. I hadn't slept well that night. Something was bothering me, and I didn't know what. And I couldn't stop touching my arm where the Dark Mark now was branded in my skin.

Entering the kitchen I spotted many other Death Eaters. The three Lestranges were sitting by a small table in the corner, whispering heatedly. Rookwood and Mulciber stood casually against a wall, cards hovering in front of them as they played some game. And in another corner stood Antonin Dolohov and the siblings Amycus and Alecto. Several Death Eaters glanced up at me as I walked towards one of the cabinets, taking a butterbeer. I smelled trouble...

-

"_Levicorpus_!"

I screamed as I was suddenly lifted into the air, dangling upside-down by my ankle. Luckily, I had taken to stuffing my pants in my boots since it was darn cold. The Death Eaters laughed, Bellatrix' voice sounding above the others'. I eyed Dolohov below me. He was the one who had cast the curse. "Let me down!" I yelled, trying desperately to reach my wand which had fallen to the ground. But there was too far down for any possible chance of getting it.

"Now isn't this fun!" Dolohov laughed, picking up my wand.

"_Antonin Dolohov_, let me down this instant!" I bellowed, my face turning red both from anger and from the blood rushing down.

"Why should I? Tell me, why are you a Ravenclaw when you aren't very clever, falling into a trap like that?"

"Oh, shut up!"

"I beg your pardon? Not very polite I see..."

"What are you? A bloody fifth year bully?! Let... me... DOWN!" They all screeched with laughter. What was so funny about it? I didn't find it very amusing...

"Let her down, Dolohov," a deep voice said calmly.

Dolohov stopped laughing and looked towards the doorway. "What, defending her now, Snape?" he said with disgust.

"No. The Dark Lord wishes to have a word with Halither, and he does not like when people are late," Snape said in an icy tone. Dolohov nodded grimly and removed the curse, letting me fall to the ground and land painfully on my back. "Follow me, Halither," Snape said and left the room.

I scrambled to my feet and followed him, sending a glare towards the pranksters.

-

"What does he want with me?" I asked Snape, trying to get rid of the eerie silence that fell between us after quite a few seconds.

"What makes you think I know?" Snape said without looking at me.

"I-- uh, I just-- never mind..."

We walked through many corridors, which gave me the impression that this place was bigger than I first had assumed. These corridors where darker, and there wasn't as many torches on the walls. It vaguely reminded me of the catacombs in Paris; though, I had never been there.

"How far are we going?" I asked after a long while. Snape didn't reply but kept walking. Suddenly he stopped at the end of a corridor where there was a wooden door.

"In there," he said and turned around, walking back.

I hesitated but then softly knocked on the door. "Enter," sounded a hoarse voice. I swallowed my gnawing feeling and opened the door. The Dark Lord was sitting in an armchair in front of a fireplace. "Good evening, Iris..." he said. He stood up and smiled slightly when I winced. The flames in the fireplace cracked and hissed, lighting up his silhouette and making his eyes look scarier than ever.

I gulped nervously. I felt even more uncomfortable with his presence than I did when he gave me the Dark Mark. Perhaps it was that we were alone. "You... you wanted to t-talk to me, my Lord?"

"Yes..." he said and walked closer to me. I winced once again when he lifted my chin to make my eyes meet his. I hadn't realised I had been looking at the floor. His voice sent a shiver through my body when he spoke, "I have a job for you..."


	5. Marked by Darkness 5

**Disclaimer:** See the first chapter.

**Background:** See the first chapter.

**Summary:** In the dark times when the Dark Lord returned to power, he searched for new followers and wished to regain what had been lost. But did all of his Death Eaters join him of free will? Iris Halither looks back and tells her tale, and discovers a horrible truth about herself...

**Note:** The story is divided into chapters, the chapters shaped into parts. One part is seven chapters, no matter the lengths of those. Some chapters are short, some are long. That's how they were written.

**-**

**The Tale of a Death Eater  
Part I: ****Marked by Darkness  
Chapter 5**

**-**

"You've got to be _kidding_," I said as I looked around. The forest was dark. The light from the sun had to force its way through the thickness of the tree branches and the dark-green leaves. Not only was it very dark, but it was very cold. I pulled my cloak closer about my shoulders, missing the warmth of the sun.

Wandering past the never-ending trees I looked over my shoulder now and then. Somehow I felt like I was being followed. I kept stopping at every small sound I heard. A foul smell reached my nostrils. I furrowed my brows but shook my head. "Probably nothing..."

I let out a scream as I was slammed against a tree. "Or was it, girly?" barked a raspy voice. It was a big, rangy man with matted grey hair and whiskers. I scrunched up my nose and tried to peel his hands off of my shoulders with no luck, long yellowish nails digging into my flesh. "You might just be my lunch snack," he said and barred his pointed teeth in a grin.

As he moved to bite my left shoulder, still wearing a toothy smile, I yelped and pressed my hands against his chest. "Wait!"

He looked up at me with a quizzical look. "You have an excuse as to why I should not devour your tasty flesh?"

"Th-the Dark Lord sent me!" I gasped.

"Really?" he said, the mystified look replaced by a smirk. "And what does the Lord want with old Greyback this time, eh?" He finally removed his hands and took a step back, which made me a bit more comfortable.

I exhaled deeply. "He wants you to pick up your old task. I don't know what he meant by that, but--"

"To be placed in crowded areas just before the full moon comes?" He laughed like there was nothing more pleasurable in the world. "Mmm, the tasty meat, girly..." he said, leaning towards me. "Can you imagine the taste of sweet, innocent children?"

"No," I breathed, pressing myself against the tree to get as far away from him as possible.

"It's... delicious..." He smiled when I swallowed hard, trying to keep my breakfast down. He turned around and walked down a small hill. I followed him. "You can tell the Dark Lord I will speak with my fellow wolves."

I stopped. "H-he wants you to come back with me, t-to give you instructions."

"...Why do you stutter?" he wondered out loud, turning to look at me with a raised eyebrow.

"I--"

"Do I... frighten you?" He took a step towards me, making me take one back. "Or are you just a very nervous person?"

"Y-you..."

"I...?"

"Uhm... you..." I didn't realise I was going backwards until my back hit another tree.

"I... what?" he said, suddenly standing right in front of me.

I shrieked and ducked under his arm, stepping behind another tree. He turned towards me, chuckling. "Stop!" I said as he closed up on me again.

"So you _are_ afraid," Greyback said. "Is it because I'm a werewolf? Or because I'm a man and we're aaall alone?"

"It's because of what you do, you monster! You _eat_ people, for Merlin's sake!"

"Merlin can't help you here! He's dead and he was _weak_. Good people don't survive in this world, girly. You have to fight to achieve your rights and reach your goals now. You better get used to it if you want to be a true Death Eater."

"I don't want to be a Death Eater," I muttered, though I think he heard me. But he didn't reply to it.

"Well, shall we?"

"...Shall we what?" I asked.

"Get going."

"Oh... of course. I-- wait!" I said as he was about to Apparate.

"What? Can't Apparate?" he asked in a sour-sweet tone.

"Yes. I'm... I'm just not very... good at it," I said, looking at the ground. When I looked up he was suddenly very close to me - a little too close for comfort.

"Then allow me!" he said cheekily, snaking his arm round my waist. He chuckled when I made a strangled sound as he pulled me close, holding quite _tightly_.

-

"You never told me your name, love," the werewolf said as we appeared back at the Headquarters. I quickly got his arm off me, keeping a certain distance.

"Halither," I said briefly.

"Must be more than Halither?" he said with that annoying, sick smile. "I'm Fenrir Greyback. There, that should be good. Now you..."

"I already _knew_ your name is Fenrir Greyback!" I burst out. "Who doesn't know?!" I sighed when he just stood there like a statue of stone with a questioning face. "Fine! It's Iris," I mumbled and started down the corridor.

I thought he had left me alone until I felt something on my neck. I stopped abruptly and spun around. "Did you just _lick_ me?!" I shrieked, staring up at him. He was _a bit_ taller than me.

"You're so much fun, Iris," he said with a smirk, walking past me.

"I'm not some bloody wolf-pup if that's what you think!" I called after him, but he just kept walking. I shuddered in disgust and tried to dry off my neck.


	6. Marked by Darkness 6

**Disclaimer:** See the first chapter.

**Background:** See the first chapter.

**Summary:** In the dark times when the Dark Lord returned to power, he searched for new followers and wished to regain what had been lost. But did all of his Death Eaters join him of free will? Iris Halither looks back and tells her tale, and discovers a horrible truth about herself...

**Note:** The story is divided into chapters, the chapters shaped into parts. One part is seven chapters, no matter the lengths of those. Some chapters are short, some are long. That's how they were written.

**-**

**The Tale of a Death Eater  
Part I: ****Marked by Darkness  
Chapter 6**

**-**

I staggered down the corridors, trying not to drop any of the potions I was carrying. I was heading for Snape's office (as he called it) where he stayed when he was needed to be close at hand. He normally worked at home, but on occasions he came to the Headquarters. No one really knew what he did. Wormtail was the only one who entered that room. He gave me the requests. But, rather him than Snape himself.

He used me to run errands for him to his little storeroom when he ran out of ingredients. When I would ask Wormtail what it was for he would tell me to mind my own business and shake his head nervously.

I could only imagine what horrors they developed in there. Or more, what horrors _Snape_ developed. Wormtail, I can imagine, was only used for 'Get me this' and 'Get me that'.

So yes, that was my current duty. And I was happy about it. There was nothing I wanted less than to kill some innocent Muggle. I didn't have anything against Muggles. I was just trying to stay alive for as long as possible. I would get killed if I denied doing as I was told. But I could never kill someone. I could never take a life.

Head hurting, filled with nothing and everything, I didn't watch where I was going. Before I knew it, I almost dropped every bottle to the floor when I collided with someone. Luckily, the potions I was carrying were encased in diamond.

"Blimey! Would yer keep an eye ahead?!"

Cyliath Persus. A young man in his 20's with a passion for torture. He was quite charming, really - if you ignored the ferocious, mad part of him. He had dark, almost black hair and very dark-blue eyes. His voice had a scent of Scottish to it, but I don't think he was even related to Scots.

"S-sorry," I stuttered. Every time I did something that caused someone to raise their voices, I would hesitate in fear of being brought to the Dark Lord. Perhaps I was exaggerating; but you never knew.

Persus shook his head and walked past me, not helping with picking up the potions.

_What a gentleman_.

-

"What took you so long?" Wormtail said, chewing his thumb with a bothered expression.

"Don't use that tone with me, Wormtail," I muttered and shoved the potions into his arms, causing him to stumble a bit backwards. He gave me a look and walked back inside.

I leaned back against the wall, sighing inwardly. Rubbing my forehead, I closed my eyes.

I just felt so... spent. I didn't have an ounce of energy left in my sickly thin body. Yes, I did eat. But it was hard to find anything proper to eat. No one brought food because they ate at home. Grim Gargoyles, they were.

"What, sleeping in the halls now, Halither?" a cold voice drawled.

"Oh, get a life, _Malfoy_," I hissed and opened my eyes. He looked paler than the last time I had seen him. I suppose the Dark Side was finally taking its toll on him. But he seemed to manage, so far. "What are you doing here, anyway? Doesn't your mother expect you? Or is she visiting your dear father?" I sneered. I stepped away from the wall and started down the corridor.

"Don't insult my parents, Halither. You're in no position to. My father happens to be one of the Dark Lord's most respected men!" Draco said and followed me.

"That's not what I heard after what happened in the Ministry, kid. He failed, didn't he? He couldn't handle a couple of teenagers, and he couldn't even get the Prophecy from Po--"

"Shut up!"

"Struck a nerve, did I?" I loved Draco. I loved to hate him. And I loved to taunt him. He was the only one who didn't have the guts to strike back. Well, he _tried_.

"Where are you going?"

"Away from you, obviously," I muttered and turned down another corridor. To my _pleasant_ surprise he followed me. I stopped, causing him to bump into me. "What do you want, Draco?"

"Nothing," he said in a careless tone.

I groaned and continued down the corridor, only to hear his footsteps follow mine. I stopped, and once again he bumped into me. "You're a pest, you know that?!"

"So I've been told," he said with a weak smirk. Oh, how frightening.

"If you don't back off right now, I swear I'll--"

"What are you two doing?"

I turned and saw Dolohov and Mulciber. "Why, we're just having a little come-together, _Antonin_," I said with a clenched jaw.

"Aaah, Draco. Long time no see. What's your mother doing lately?" Dolohov said, ignoring me completely. I wasn't complaining.

"Busy," Draco said simply. Dolohov just nodded. What kind of communication is that? Must be something between men. Though, I would hardly call Malfoy a man yet.

I rolled my eyes and continued (_again_) down the corridor. I walked a bit faster and reached my room before Draco could catch up. Bloody little mite.

I threw my black cloak towards the closet and sat down on my bed.

_Relief_...


	7. Marked by Darkness 7

**Disclaimer:** See the first chapter.

**Background:** See the first chapter.

**Summary:** In the dark times when the Dark Lord returned to power, he searched for new followers and wished to regain what had been lost. But did all of his Death Eaters join him of free will? Iris Halither looks back and tells her tale, and discovers a horrible truth about herself...

**Note:** The story is divided into chapters, the chapters shaped into parts. One part is seven chapters, no matter the lengths of those. Some chapters are short, some are long. That's how they were written.

**-**

**The Tale of a Death Eater  
Part I: ****Marked by Darkness  
Chapter 7**

**-**

"We lost her," I groaned and rubbed my hands together to get a bit of warmth, trying to force some oxygen back in my lungs from the running. "Great griffin, it's freezing out here!"

"Quiet, Iris. Concentrate."

"And that should come from you? I must be dreaming--"

"Shh! I'm trying to trace her..."

"Great, use some of that wolf-sense of yours," I muttered. Greyback glared. That made me shut up. The last thing I needed was trouble from a werewolf. Especially _that_ werewolf. The werewolf _king_. Sense my sarcasm? Okay, maybe that's exaggerated, but he seriously frightened me at times... okay, always. But that didn't stop me from snapping at him when he was annoying.

I started blowing on my hands, not getting the least feeling back in them. I never really was a fieldsman. Can you blame me? One minute you're stalking someone 'important-or-whatnot', the next you're fleeing from Aurors who somehow appear on left and right. Not that I had experienced that yet, but I feared it every moment I spent in the streets. I had no wishes of going to Azkaban.

"This way," Greyback growled and started running in some direction.

I sighed and set off after him. "Uhm, Greyback, you sure you're right? 'Cause I don't see her any--"

"There," he said and pointed towards a stately-looking witch with an emerald green shawl round her neck, a dark-brown cloak drawn closely to her body.

"Oh," was all I uttered. "What... what do you think she's looking for?" I whispered, glancing at the restless witch.

"Order-business of some sort, don't ask me. It's about time the Order of the Phoenix sees its fall. Starting with Emmeline Vance..."

-

I stared down at the body on the ground in front of me. Fenrir Greyback had used my wand to send the Dark Mark to the sky, chuckling evilly as he did. "I never get tired of seeing its glow," he said with a manic glint in his eye. I gulped hard, trying to keep my dinner where it belonged. It was so sick. It was so wrong. This was only the second murder I had witnessed, and yet I felt as if it was the first. The empty look in Vance's eyes haunted me and I couldn't look away.

"Come on, girl. Get moving!" Greyback said and motioned for me to come over to him. No, I still hadn't gotten the hold of Apparition. But it would come. At least I hoped so.

I walked over to him and curled my lips in disgust as his arms yet again snaked around my waist. "Brace yourself," he said with a grin. I rolled my eyes, but quickly closed them as he Apparated back to the Headquarters.

When we appeared back at the Headquarters I ran straight for the kitchen, rushing over to the sink. I immediately opened for the enchanted warm water and grabbed the soap. There was no plumbing, you see. It _was_ underground in the middle of nowhere.

I felt dirty, scrubbing my hands again and again, not seeming to get them clean enough. No, I hadn't been the one to kill her, but watching a murder and not doing anything to prevent it from happening... I felt so wrong. It was partly my fault Emmeline Vance was dead. Mostly because she wasn't a Muggle.

I understood (but only half-heartedly) that they wanted Muggles gone because of their opinions of them... but their _own_ kind? It seemed obscene to me. I couldn't get the thought right anywhere in my head. Mind, I was a pure-blood witch myself, but I never shared their thoughts or opinions. I was never _really_ a Death Eater. But what could I do? This was not how I wanted to die.

Yet... what kind of life did I have to live?

-

"It's so darn cold!" Cyliath Persus said and brushed the snow off his robes as we entered the inn.

"Stop complaining, we _know_ it's cold," Jugson snapped.

I followed the others to a table in the far back and sat down on the chair nearest the fireplace. We were in northern England, and winter had made itself quite in the countryside. We had been on the move for weeks, Jugson, Persus, Avery, Dolohov and I. It was no wonder I was absolutely _crushed_. I hadn't had a proper night's sleep for a very long time.

We were in search for two elder wizards. They had somehow gotten on the Dark Lord's wrong side. They were clever, the others reminded me every second minute, so we needed to be cautious, alert and always at attention. But that's hard when you don't have time to eat, sleep or even sit down. Though, for the moment we took the luxury of a short break, to regain some strength.

"I'm so hungry," I groaned.

"No food," Dolohov said.

"What do you mean _no food_? Are you aware of we haven't eaten for three _blasted_ days? I'm dying here!"

"It could be poisoned."

"Well, who would bloody poison it? That soup smells so good!"

"Shut up," Jugson growled as Dolohov was about to retaliate.

"What got in your way lately?" I hissed.

"Ants and mosquitoes, that's what. Don't tell me you haven't been stung?"

I grumbled and scratched my arm.

-

I tossed and turned in my matchbox of a bed that night. Well, not a bed, really. It was merely a bunch of blankets under a table. They had allowed us to sleep by the fireplace. Pathetic, I know. But it was better than when I was roaming the streets, searching for a shelter of any kind.

The inn-keeper had stared at Antonin Dolohov for a moment. My hope was that he hadn't recognised him from a Wanted poster. But then he just shrugged it off and brought us some blankets. And so, here I was, unable to wander into the comforting world of sleep... though my dreams were replaced by nightmares.

I lay on my right side and stared at Persus' slightly twitching nostrils. Then I turned to my left and gazed into the red and gold of the flames in the fireplace. No matter how I lay, sleep just didn't seem to take over. Finally, I stood up and walked towards the door.

"Where are you going?" Persus grumbled.

"I can't sleep. I need some fresh air." Without waiting for his respond, I grabbed my cloak and went into the dark.

As I was walking down different stone-paths, I reached a forest. Needing some time alone, I strode past the trees and lit my wand, enjoying the silence.

After some time (I don't know how far I had walked) I began to hesitate. Maybe it wouldn't be too safe to be too far away from the others. I turned and headed back. Reaching the edge of the forest, I paused by the path and quickly removed the lighting spell, muttering, "_Nox_."

Two persons with lit wands were standing very near me. They were holding their wands above some sort of poster on a fence behind the inn. I couldn't see what the pictures were, but they filled half of the page, followed by a text below.

I let out a muffled shriek as a rough hand clasped over my mouth and I was pulled behind the tree. Avery put his finger against his lips, though he was looking at the two strangers. "Aurors," he muttered.

"_What_? Those two?!"

"Yes..."

"_Shit_," I hissed, getting nervous. I had never really faced an Auror. On the contrary, I had avoided them. "Where are the others?" He pointed to the right silently, and I saw the three others pulling out their wands, eyes fixed on the Aurors.


	8. Seeing the Foreseen 8

**Disclaimer:** See the first chapter.

**Background:** See the first chapter.

**Summary:** In the dark times when the Dark Lord returned to power, he searched for new followers and wished to regain what had been lost. But did all of his Death Eaters join him of free will? Iris Halither looks back and tells her tale, and discovers a horrible truth about herself...

**Note:** The story is divided into chapters, the chapters shaped into parts. One part is seven chapters, no matter the lengths of those. Some chapters are short, some are long. That's how they were written.

**-**

**The Tale of a Death Eater  
Part II: S****eeing the Foreseen  
Chapter 8**

**-**

I watched as Jugson moved closer to the edge of the forest, standing dangerously close to the Aurors. He flicked his wand and summoned the Aurors' wands in silence, the spell created in his mind. I never figured out how to do that...

It seemed to work as the Aurors' wands began to worm out of their pockets, but then one of them noticed and grabbed his wand. "_Expelliarmus_!"

With widened eyes I dodged the spell that missed Jugson and pulled out my own wand, wondering what good it would do me at all. "Death Eaters!" the other Auror alerted and soon I saw more Aurors rushing down the path.

"Into the woods!" Dolohov hissed and sent a curse in the Aurors' direction. Of course, I didn't hesitate to follow that order and fled for my life.

-

The snow creaked below my feet. The trees weren't gathered close to each other and provided no hide. I could hear the shouting of spells and curses behind me, the yelling of the Aurors seeming to get closer yet never reaching me completely. I yelped as a red beam shot right past me, melting the snow as it hit the ground. I ran behind a tree and tried to catch my breath. The sound of the Aurors and the other Death Eaters seemed to get more distant.

As my breathing became regular, I slowly turned around and warily looked behind the tree. I shrieked as someone grabbed my shoulder and spun around, thrusting my fist forward. It collided with someone's face and I watched, awestruck, as the Auror tumbled onto the ground. When I realised what just happened, I clutched my bruised hand, cursing under my breath. I rushed past the Auror as he began to stir, wondering slightly why he hadn't just thrown a spell at me when I hadn't seen him.

The trees became smaller in number when I came closer to the edge of the forest. And I started to get more nervous. I could see no sign of shelter or somewhere to hide. I had to Apparate. But I knew that was impossible. And I didn't really want to be 'splinched'.

I looked around for the others, spotting Avery and Persus not too far away, standing behind some trees, sending one curse after another at three Aurors near by. I had no other choice than to go to them, so I ran as fast as I could, trying not to be spotted by the Aurors. But they had to have seen me already, anyway.

My heart practically stopped as I was about two metres away from them. Avery sent one last curse and hit an Auror in his chest just before he Disapparated. "_Persus_!" I yelled, terrified that he'd leave. He didn't look at me, and two seconds later... he was gone. "Oh... shit..." I breathed as I eyed the carefully approaching Aurors. I avoided the spells sent towards me and ran back into the forest, making as much distance from them as I could. But I could hear feet rushing through the snow everywhere. There were more than I had first presumed.

My throat was stinging and I couldn't feel my arms and legs anymore. I felt like I had run forever, yet it must not have been more than a few minutes. The Aurors behind me were very close and their spells were coming from all around me.

Suddenly, one hit my left leg, and I screamed in pain as I fell into the snow. Now I was certain I couldn't feel my leg. I couldn't move it the slightest. I tried to stand up and limp on, but my right leg wouldn't obey me. So I started worming my way through the snow, desperately trying to get away.

"_Incarcerous_!"

Thick ropes appeared out of thin air and wrapped tightly around my thin figure, preventing me from breathing properly as I wheezed after the running, my lungs hurting like hell. I stared as a pair of worn, black boots entered my field of vision. I tried to look up at the Auror but couldn't raise my head further. Someone turned me onto my back and my eyes flicked back and forth between the four or five Aurors above me. I squirmed uncomfortably as one of them squad and pulled my hood down, ripping off my Death Eater mask.

"Never seen that one before," said a deep voice, without doubt a man's.

"I have. Iris Halither, pure-blooded," said a younger male.

The man beside me lit his wand and held it close to my face, making me blink constantly. My breathing was still very irregular, and it didn't help that I was scared to death of what was going to happen to me.

"Very young. A shame..." muttered the Auror. Two of the others hoisted me up by my shoulders. I swallowed hard and felt nauseous as a cold sweat broke on my forehead. I must have been all of a tremble.

Soon, I felt the familiar feeling of Side-Along Apparition as one of the Aurors Disapparated with me from the forest.

-

We appeared in front of the huge wooden door of a dark stone-castle. I looked behind me and saw a cliff, thrashing waves far below. "W-where have you taken me?" I stuttered, my voice threatening to break.

The Auror with the deep voice looked at me. "Azkaban Prison," he said coldly. An unwanted chill ran down my spine at his answer. "You will stay here till court." The door opened and they led me inside.

It was extremely cold in the prison. The walls were covered in dust and other muck. If I hadn't been freezing already, I certainly would now. The Aurors took me down many corridors. At some point I started to hear wailing sounds and screaming. A madhouse. I didn't belong there, with the seedy remains of the other prisoners.

"In here," the man with the deep voice said and unlocked a cell. When I didn't move, one of the others pushed me inside. They made the ropes disappear and shut the door to the cell. I spun around and rushed towards the door to be stopped by the tip of a wand against my throat.

"_Back_," the Auror hissed. I took a few steps backwards and gazed dreadfully after them as they left.

I took some heavy breaths and sat down against the wall in a corner of my cell. _My_ cell. It sounds so wrong. And it was. I shouldn't be there. I didn't _belong_ there. I was innocent. And I _had_ to prove that to them when I would sit before the Wizengamot. But I was still scared. Scared of my fate. Scared for my life.

"What is to become of me...?" I muttered as the noises around me quieted, the only sound being the beating of my heart...


	9. Seeing the Foreseen 9

**Disclaimer:** See the first chapter.

**Background:** See the first chapter.

**Summary:** In the dark times when the Dark Lord returned to power, he searched for new followers and wished to regain what had been lost. But did all of his Death Eaters join him of free will? Iris Halither looks back and tells her tale, and discovers a horrible truth about herself...

**Note:** The story is divided into chapters, the chapters shaped into parts. One part is seven chapters, no matter the lengths of those. Some chapters are short, some are long. That's how they were written.

**-**

**The Tale of a Death Eater  
Part II: S****eeing the Foreseen  
Chapter 9**

**-**

I traced the Dark Mark on my arm with my fingertips, wondering how a symbol could be the one thing that claimed me a Death Eater. The one thing that did I had at least half the world against me. The one thing that kept my freedom at unreachable distance. Yet, I marvelled it. It called to me in a tongue I did not understand. There was something special about it. Maybe it was that it presented more than I had to realise before my encounter with the dark. And the mark was still fresh. It still hurt a bit when I touched it, even though I had had it for months.

Scowling at the disgusting bowl of porridge in front of me, I dug into my cloak, trying to keep the little warmth I had left. I had no idea how long I had been there. Maybe a couple of hours, maybe longer. I sighed and rubbed my hands, having no feeling left in them.

"Aren't you going to eat that?" sounded a male-voice. My brows knit as my eyes wandered the little cell. To the right a wall divided my cell and the next - the wall I was sitting against - but to the left, by the bars connected to another cell, was a man. I ignored him and looked back to the porridge, scrunching up my nose. "You need nourishment," he said.

"I'm not going to _eat_ that," I hissed and looked at him through the corners of my eyes.

The man snorted. "Get used to it."

"To your information, I'll be out any moment," I smarted.

"Not with _that_ branded to your forearm." I clutched my arm, opening my mouth to say something back, but eventually closed it again. "How long have you been by the Dark Lord's side?" he asked with a growing smirk.

I looked at him, perplexed. "I..."

"You look like a very _intimidating_ Death Eater," he sneered, sarcasm clear in his voice.

"Uh... I--"

"Have you killed a lot?" he interrupted.

"I haven't--"

"Tortured?"

"Look, I haven't done anything like that! I could never kill or torture an innocent--"

"You don't know what being a Death Eater is about, _do_ you? What an honour it is to be one of the Dark Lord's closest men? The _pleasure_ you get by giving Mudbloods what they deserve?" The man's eyes gleamed in the faint moonlight from the windows high above. They were a cold grey, and I found myself shrinking before him, even though we were separated by bars and he was at safe distance.

"And I suppose you would know?" I said in a very small voice.

"I was one of the best. I was the best of the entire lot." His voice held arrogance as he looked at the floor, reliving the past in his mind.

"So... what went wrong?" I questioned, caught now by our opposite past, yet identical present.

His lips curled and his left hand tightened around one of the bars. "_Potter_..."

My mouth cracked open. "You've met Harry Potter?" I whispered.

"On more than one occasion," he snarled, not too thrilled. "But yes. That's why I'm here. Because of the infamous _Harry Potter_. If Dumbledore and his beloved Order of the Phoenix hadn't come, I would have succeeded... Why am I even telling you this?" he wondered out loud. I looked at my deathly pale hands, noticing how thin they had become. The man's eyes bore into mine when I looked up at him again. "...What's _your_ story?"

"There's nothing to tell, really," I sighed, pulling my hood further down into my eyes, shifting uncomfortably under his gaze. "W...what's your name?"

"Malfoy," he said shortly. And now I could see it. His ice-grey eyes and his long and pale blonde hair. And the smirk, oh yes, the same smirk as that of his son.

"I know a Malfoy," I said. "Draco Malfoy." His eyes shimmered with recognition. "And you may be his father Lucius."

"I might," he said. "So tell me, _young Death Eater_... what might your name be?"

Reason debated against curiosity. I wanted to learn more of this powerful Death Eater, this man who was well-respected by society before his doings were known. I was curious as to how he had kept a strong posture in the Dark Lord's service, why he didn't feel broken... like I did. But I knew it would be risky to reveal my name. I shouldn't let myself be known. But if he was a Death Eater... what difference did it make?

I opened my mouth and let the words slip, "Iris Halither."

"Pull down your hood," Malfoy said, demanding to know what I looked like. Hesitantly, I reached up and wrapped my fingers around the edge of my hood, slowly pulling it down. Malfoy's eyes wandered my features. "You're very young," he said. "Very young indeed."

"Not as young as your son," I countered, feeling like he was challenging me in a way. But his face told me opposite. He seemed... fascinated? But no, half a second later his face was as expressionless as before.

It was like he wore a mask of All Hallows Eve. His face was narrowed by hunger and there were dark shadows below his eyes. His hair was tussled and unwashed, and he looked utterly tired, like he had spent eternity in the clutches of the Dementors.

...Did I really feel pity for this wreck of a man? I bet there were men and women in that prison looking far worse. And there were no Dementors, _that_ I knew. They had joined the Dark Lord's side. And instead, Aurors patrolled the prison.

I cast a sidelong glance at the porridge and slowly edged towards it. "Here," I said and pushed it through the bars. Before I could withdraw my arm, Malfoy grasped it and held on to it tightly, most likely stopping the circulation of my blood. "Let go!" I said, desperately trying to pull my arm free.

He pulled my sleeve up to my elbow and stared at the Dark Mark. He ran his bone-like fingers over it, causing shivers and slight pain to run up my spine. "Fresh," he said. "You haven't had it for long." Whether he knew it hurt, I did not know. The mark wasn't black. It merely looked like a scar; a scar formed like a skull with a snake slithering out of its mouth. "You were threatened to be one of us, weren't you?" Malfoy purred, looking up at me. It was even more uncomfortable being so close to his face.

"Threatened... and in some way forced," I replied, though not completely truthfully. I kept in a groan as I felt my arm getting numb.

Malfoy released me and sat against the wall in his cell, pulling over the bowl of porridge and wolfing it down, without as much as thanks. Yes, the Malfoys were certainly an appreciating bunch... very grateful...

-

As the night continued to fly by, it got colder and darker in Azkaban. The Aurors strolled in the corridors more frequently and stopped by _every_ cell _every_ time, checking things were as they should be.

I found no comfort in the dark faces of the Aurors, only wanting them to be gone. I knew _they_ wouldn't believe me. They had seen me there, caught me in the act so to say. But _someone_ had to believe I was innocent. There had to be a person with a heart in the Wizengamot.

That, I prayed and hoped for. I had to believe in it. It was a matter of staying sane. If I didn't possess hope and belief, I would be reduced to something far worse than one of the mad wrecks in Azkaban Prison. And with a tiny spark of worry and hopefulness, with the cold air seeping through my robes, digging into the midst of my bones... I fell asleep.


	10. Seeing the Foreseen 10

**Disclaimer:** See the first chapter.

**Background:** See the first chapter.

**Summary:** In the dark times when the Dark Lord returned to power, he searched for new followers and wished to regain what had been lost. But did all of his Death Eaters join him of free will? Iris Halither looks back and tells her tale, and discovers a horrible truth about herself...

**Note:** The story is divided into chapters, the chapters shaped into parts. One part is seven chapters, no matter the lengths of those. Some chapters are short, some are long. That's how they were written.

**-**

**The Tale of a Death Eater  
Part II: Se****eing the Foreseen  
Chapter 10**

**-**

I groaned as I woke, feeling the half of my face numbed by cold. I lay on my side, my face pressed against the freezing stone-floor. A thin layer of ice covered the cell as the window had no glass and the air was clear and frosty, my breath coming in small clouds.

I sat up and yawned. My entire body was aching from bad sleep, and I rolled my shoulders to get rid of the pain in my neck. I looked into Malfoy's cell and found him sound asleep. He was used to the conditions by then, I suppose.

Huddling up in a pitiful bundle in a corner, I listened to the distant sounds of the ocean below the precipitous cliffs. It was a long time since I had heard the crashing waves of the sea. In Azkaban, it was constant. But you had to listen carefully.

No one else seemed to be awake. I guessed it was early. There was practically no light in the little cell at all and looking upwards, I saw the sky was close to black. Sitting there in the quiet, I wondered when my trial would be. It couldn't be long. Would they tell me when? Why hadn't they said anything yet?

Lucius Malfoy stirred and turned towards me. "Daydreaming, Halither?" he smirked.

Glaring, I turned my back towards him. "Don't patronise me, Malfoy..."

"What would you be worrying your little head about, hmm? Family...? Friends...? Not that I would expect you to have any--"

"Just leave me alone, would you?" I snapped, shooting him a glance over my shoulder.

"I don't have anything better to do, do I? You can talk to me. After all... _we're colleagues_..."

I picked at one of my nails, finding all of them short and chipped after months of nervous biting. "Do you know how long it is before you're trialled?" I asked after some time's silence.

"_Trialled_?" Of that he chuckled, wearing a better-knowing smile. "You really think they're going to trial you? A Death Eater?"

"I... They said they would," I whispered.

"The Ministry won't bother with a mere Death Eater. Now that the Dark Lord is back they have more at hands. They're probably thrilled to have caught you! I can almost hear them bragging to the Daily Prophet back in London... They won't spend precious time on you, Halither. Not a Death Eater. The Dark Mark is enough for a lifetime sentence these days. They won't listen to explanations, I bet you..."

The hair at the back of my neck stood at end, sending a disgusting feeling through me. "But they said I would have a trial," I repeated.

"Routine. They're probably paid to say that to every prisoner that comes here. They didn't tell you when, now did they?" The conversation ended there. I said nothing more. He let me be.

Lies. Hollow lies. Spawn of Merwyn the Malicious. All lies.

The little hope I had left soon abandoned me after that. I felt helpless, hopeless. I was completely convinced I would stay in Azkaban Prison till the end of my days, die there, amongst the rotting corpses that truly belonged inside the stonewalls. Not me. It wasn't meant for me. It wasn't right for me to be thrown in a madman's cave like that. Unjust. That's what it was.

-

So the days went by at an achingly slow pace. I could barely stomach the horrid taste of the porridge we were served in Azkaban, and it didn't smell very nice either. After such a meal, on a day like any other, Malfoy motioned for me to come closer...

"Be ready," he said.

"Ready? Ready for what?"

"Word has spread. Something is about to happen. And if you use your smarts, there is a chance for escape," he said through clenched teeth. "But be quiet about it..."

Crawling back to my usual corner I lowered my gaze, frowning. Escape? Was the Dark Lord sending help? But why would he care...? Although, to get more power he needed more servants. And there were many desperate and loyal men and women in Azkaban, wanting nothing more than to return to his side.

All I could do was to wait for whatever would come. Then I could seize my chance...

-

It was on the blackest of nights it happened. The sound of battle bounced against the walls, stirring commotion amongst the prisoners, startling me awake. Lucius Malfoy was standing up, his hands clutched around the bars of his cell-door. "What's happening?" I hissed, standing up with some difficulties, my legs terribly stiff.

"The Aurors are gathered in a higher part of the fort. Someone's here," he said with a devilish smile. His eyes were flicking over the ceiling, eyeing the dust particles that fell from the ancient stone.

I too looked upwards with a more hesitating eye. My thundering heart was nearly suffocating me as running steps were heard from the stair to the right. I moved closer to my cell-door as the manic laughter of a woman reached my ears.

"Well if isn't my dear _brother-in-law_," a shrill female-voice wheezed and the woman came to a halt in front of Malfoy's cell.

"What brings you to this humble place, Bella?" Malfoy sneered.

"Collecting a few friends for old times' sake," said Bella wide-eyed and smiling. "But now that I'm here I might as well give my sister a little rest!" She thrust a wand in his hand. "Serve yourself," she said and then continued on her way, snickering as she did.

Before I had time to register exactly what had happened, Malfoy had blown his cell-door off its hinges and looked towards me as he stepped over it. "Need help?" he asked, of course, with a smirk.

"Want to take a guess?" I sneered.

"No need to get an attitude, do you need help or what?"

"You're the one with the attitude! Now would you mind? The Aurors will be here any minute!"

"Thought so..."

I stepped back and covered my face as he used the Reductor Curse to blast a hole into my cell. I coughed from the smoke and stumbled out, blinking rapidly. "Where are you going?" I called as Malfoy moved past other cells, towards the stair at the opposite end.

"Out of here," he said, "now are you coming or not?"

-

I stayed close to Malfoy, being without wand. Though, again I must say it would have done me no good even if I had had one.

Everything was chaos. The air was filled with dust and there were holes in both floors and walls. On our way through the prison, I saw many more out-breaking prisoners than Aurors. It was a terrifying sight.

"What are you doing?" I hissed and stopped as Malfoy came to a halt.

He wasn't looking at me, but raised his wand. "_Morsmordre_!"

I watched as the Dark Mark cast its green glow on the walls. It rose and levitated through a hole in the ceiling, slowly rising to the sky and nesting amongst the clouds. This seemed to excite the corrupt minds of the prisoners in a way beyond my understanding. Malfoy smiled with an awkward pride and satisfaction and continued down the corridors.

We reached a tortuous stair which led upwards, and I followed close behind Malfoy as he ran towards the upper floors. "Do you have... a plan?" I panted, forcing my legs to keep moving.

"Yes," he said shortly.

"Well... that's a good thing, then..." I stopped gratefully at the top of the stair, glancing at the door in front of us. Malfoy eyed it suspiciously and wasted no time opening it, but simply blew it up.

"Is that a Malfoy way of being discreet?" I said and peered nervously down the stair.

"It was locked," he smarted and shrugged, proceeding to step high over the rubble and pieces of wood. "Ah... _now_ we are getting somewhere..."

I looked around to see we had reached one of the highest parts of the fort. Walking closer to one of the walls, I looked down and quickly stepped back. The only way down was by jumping over the wall, which ended in steep and rocky cliffs.

"What is your plan, again?" I asked, my voice turning high-pitched.

"You cannot Apparate or Disapparate inside the walls of Azkaban. But outside..."

"You want to use Apparition? _Up here_? Isn't that dangerous?! I mean, couldn't you end up in the middle of the bloody sky somewhere and fall to your bloody death--"

"Not if you know _exactly_ where to go and stay _focused_ and _concentrated_. Don't you remember the D's? Destination, determination and deliberation?" he smirked.

"It's not funny! And no, sorry, I can't say I recall the exact words! And I never passed Apparition! I splinched _every time_!" I screeched.

Malfoy rolled his eyes. Yes, he rolled his damned eyes. "Then I suppose you want a _lift_, Miss Halither?"

"_If you'd be so kind_,_ Mr. Malfoy_," I said, grinding my teeth. Suddenly, I was falling through the air. I screamed, realising he had pushed me. Looking down, panic overtook my entire body as I saw the cliffs, the rocks and the black water coming closer.

"Want help?!" came Malfoy's voice above my screaming. He was there, falling beside me.

"What's wrong with you?! DO SOMETHING! Apparate, Disapparate, do whatever! JUST DO SOMETHING, DAMN IT! We're goin' to _die_!"

"That's not a very nice way to ask for help, now is it?!"

"WE'RE GOING TO DIE, YOU PRICK! BLOODY APPARATE!"

"Now that you're being so polite...!"

I continued to scream.

Down...

Down...

And the water kept coming closer. I could feel the rocks piercing my skin, the water ripping me apart any moment. And I continued to scream. Then, as the water surface was less than two feet away, arms pulled me close and the water, the rocks, the cliffs, the walls of Azkaban Prison, the Dark Mark... everything was gone...


	11. Seeing the Foreseen 11

**Disclaimer:** See the first chapter.

**Background:** See the first chapter.

**Summary:** In the dark times when the Dark Lord returned to power, he searched for new followers and wished to regain what had been lost. But did all of his Death Eaters join him of free will? Iris Halither looks back and tells her tale, and discovers a horrible truth about herself...

**Note:** The story is divided into chapters, the chapters shaped into parts. One part is seven chapters, no matter the lengths of those. Some chapters are short, some are long. That's how they were written.

**-**

**The Tale of a Death Eater  
Part II: Se****eing the Foreseen  
Chapter 11**

**-**

I fell backwards and landed hard on my... behind. With pained eyes I looked up just in time to see Malfoy roll his eyes. "Are you always this... unsteady?" he asked.

"It's not like I _try_ to be," I snapped and got to my feet. "...Where are we?"

"Malfoy Mansion," he said proudly.

"_What_? Are you mad?! We can't be here, we could get caught!"

"We're not here for long. I'm just getting my wand. I can't use _this_," Malfoy said and dropped the wand he had gotten from that _Bella_ woman.

"Then hurry up. I don't want to end up in Azkaban again," I grumbled. As he ventured towards the outlines of a large building I bent down and put the wand in my pocket. "Better safe than sorry," I muttered and hurried after him.

Malfoy stopped in front of a tall wooden door. "_Pure-blood Slytherin_..." he said. My eyes flicked between him and the door as it slowly opened, soundlessly. I followed him inside with wary steps.

"Are you sure this is a good idea? Won't someone be here?" I whispered.

"House-elves, most likely. But they won't make a sound. They wouldn't dare," he stated.

"Well... that's nice... I guess..." I jumped of surprise when light flickered and candles lit round the hall, which - if I may say so - made an extraordinary sight. Never have I _seen_ such rich-coloured carpets, glorious gargoyles and marvellously detailed paintings. Well, except from at Hogwarts. The dominant colours were different kinds of green, black and silver. And also, I noticed, all chandeliers and candlesticks were silver, or maybe white gold.

"It's not much... but it's home," Malfoy said.

"_Right_," I said, though with a bit sarcastically. I mean, honestly...

A gasp escaped my mouth as a candlestick was knocked to the floor by a spell.

"_Who_ are you, and _what_ do you want?" an elegant female-voice demanded.

"Now, what kind of greeting is that in my own home, Narcissa?" Lucius Malfoy said with a tone of great disapproval.

"..._Lucius_?" A long-haired blonde woman dressed in a white silk-nightgown descended the staircase at the centre of the hall, the stump of a candle in her left hand, a wand in her right. "Lucius?" she said. "How can it be you? You... you were sent to Azkaban..."

"Sorry to disappoint you, but I escaped..."

I covered my ears as she screeched. She made the candle turn into a puff of smoke and ran towards Malfoy, embracing him and kissing him deeply on the mouth.

"Um... still here?" I said awkwardly, feeling my cheeks flush.

"Narcissa, this is Iris Halither. Halither, this is my wife Narcissa." _God forbid_, but yes... there were more of 'em bloody Malfoys.

"...Hello?" I hesitated.

"I helped her out of Azkaban."

"Ah! I think I've heard Draco mention you once," Narcissa said, clinging onto Lucius Malfoy's arm, probably afraid he'd disappear if she let go. She studied me with a somewhat judging look. "You must both be exhausted. Why don't you stay here for the night?" she said, looking to her husband for approval.

"You can stay in a spare room, Halither. Tomorrow we shall both go see the Dark Lord," said _Mr. Malfoy_.

"Thank you," I said.

-

"...How old is the Malfoy-line?" I asked, startling the little house-elf as it led me towards the spare room of the Malfoy Mansion. There were probably more, but whatever.

"Many centuries, Miss. Long time," it said.

"And they were all Slytherins?"

"Yes, Miss. No better, says Master Malfoy... Only pure..." I looked at the many paintings of past Malfoys, seeing the blond hair and cold eyes in many of the unfamiliar faces as they followed me with their eyes. And they all seemed to resemble each other in some way, apart from the looks. "Here we is, Miss," squeaked the little house-elf, stopping in front of a black-painted door. "Goodnight." And with that it scuttled off to sleep.

I opened the door and entered a rather white coloured room. The floor was flawless white marble and the ceiling and walls were painted white. The drapes of the four-poster bed which stood by the left wall were dark green, as were the curtains of the lone window in the farthest wall.

Sitting down on the bed I shuck off my dirty cloak and worn boots with a grateful sigh. "What will happen to me now?" I wondered. Would I just return to the Headquarters and continue being Snape's errand slave? Almost seemed like I escaped one prison and returned to another.

"Who the _bloody hell_ are you?" sounded a man's voice, causing me to jump. I raised my head and saw the painting of an elderly man hanging on the opposite wall.

"None of your business," I said.

"Don't _you_ have the cheek? I want a proper answer, girl, 'cause you're _certainly_ no Malfoy!" croaked the painting.

"I'm a _guest_..."

"And what's the name of this _guest_?"

I groaned. "Iris Halither. Are you happy now?"

He laughed. And to tell you the fact, he had quite a _loud_ laughter... which _didn't_ help my starting headache. "_Halither_?" he chuckled. "_You're_ a Halither? I thought they'd be extinct by now!"

"And what's that supposed to mean?" I asked with drawn brows, already disliking this tart-mouthed man who insulted my name.

"The Halither-line is _useless_," he said and added, "useless like damn Mudbloods!" And then he laughed again. Had he not been a painting I'd have torn out his tongue.

"My family's not useless!" I snapped.

"Oh? And what are your qualities, then? What do you do? Assist the Minister for Magic? I think not! _All_ Halithers have been no-goods. They should've been born Mudbloods... Squibs the whole lot..."

"I'm not a Squib!"

"Right... so you're a _master_ at spells, hmm?" He hit a nerve there, I admit that. I didn't know what to say, how to retaliate... 'cause he was right.

"So I'm not good with a wand? But to your information I'm _excellent_ at brewing potions," I said, drawing some pride in my tone.

"Ah... And you put those qualities into good use, I s'pose?" he smirked, reminding me of his successors.

"I... well, I haven't exactly had the... opportunity yet..." I said, lowering my gaze. Not wanting to talk to him anymore, I turned and crawled under the blanket, lay on my side and rested my head on the pillow.

"_Useless_..." echoed the painting.


	12. Seeing the Foreseen 12

**Disclaimer:** See the first chapter.

**Background:** See the first chapter.

**Summary:** In the dark times when the Dark Lord returned to power, he searched for new followers and wished to regain what had been lost. But did all of his Death Eaters join him of free will? Iris Halither looks back and tells her tale, and discovers a horrible truth about herself...

**Note:** The story is divided into chapters, the chapters shaped into parts. One part is seven chapters, no matter the lengths of those. Some chapters are short, some are long. That's how they were written.

**-**

**The Tale of a Death Eater  
Part II: Se****eing the Foreseen  
Chapter 12**

**-**

I woke sometime in the dawn of a new day. The rude man in the portrait was asleep, grunting and snoring. I sat up in the bed and knew what I had to do... I swung my legs over the side of the bed and pulled my boots back on my sore feet where after I dressed in my cloak and walked towards the window. Carefully I unlocked it, glancing back at the portrait. Nothing. Then I opened the window and leaned out, looking down. The spare room was on the first floor. So it was a long way down when I was as weak as I was... at the moment...

I crawled out of the window, sitting on the windowsill. I looked down warily and let go, falling to the ground. Landing on my hands and knees in the snow, I quickly stood up and looked around. Seeing nothing that would cause trouble I slowly headed towards the small forest area near the mansion, slipping in the snow once in a while.

The night sky was clear and starry for once, a half-moon peering down from some lone clouds. The snow had melted a bit during the night, a fine ice layer covering the surface, which made walking a very unsteady task.

Finally reaching the trees I looked back at the Malfoy Mansion, hoping no one had noticed me. I smiled. No one in sight. No one there. Just me. "Okay, you can do this," I muttered to myself, pacing between the trees. "But where--?" I stopped walking and looked up. Of course...

I had only been there once in my life, but I remembered the surroundings clearly. The question was... could I focus on them _enough_? I was in no mood to be splinched and certainly not in a situation where I could risk it. But if I didn't... Well, I had to.

I closed my eyes, concentrating hard... Opening my eyes again, I smiled.

...I had reached my destination.

-

About a week after my escape from Azkaban and the Malfoys, I was slowly getting settled. I had spent the last of my money renting a room in a small wizard-inn. I had fled to Scotland, Edinburgh to be exact, where I was steadily building a new life.

I worked in the inn to pay for the room. But I went under a false name as to not be recognised. And I had coloured my hair and brows with a spell... yes, a spell. I succeeded a spell. It actually looked like it was my natural hair-colour. And, with a wary hand, I had also cut it _considerably_ shorter. Meaning, it got very short.

So this was my fresh start as the black-haired witch Iris Dauntell...

-

"Pigs," I muttered, shaking my head as I picked up some empty bottles of butterbeer from some drunken wizards' table. They were so drunk they had fallen asleep.

The Scottish inn was a bit more _alive_ than the Leaky Cauldron had been. And the inn itself was a bit of a mixture between a smelly pub and a comfy café. But most of the visitors were suspicious-looking, if you ask me. I'm most certain some were Death Eaters. But I can't be sure. It actually wasn't so many Death Eaters that knew each other, as to keep the identity of each Death Eater safer. And that was just an advantage on my behalf.

I walked to the bar and put the bottles inside a box under the sink. Sighing, I leaned against the wall, looking at my feet. It had been a long day. But I was glad. I was relaxed. It felt like an enormous weight of worry had been lifted off my shoulders since I had left the Malfoy Mansion. For the first time in years I felt like I had somewhere I could feel safe. Hogwarts had been the only other place I'd felt comfortable. I know that I didn't have my own home and my own things, but I had what I needed. And that was good enough for me. The inn was my sanctuary.

I looked up when the door opened. Two men entered, stomping snow off of their boots and quickly pulling off their soaked cloaks. I walked to their table as they sat down. "What can I do you for?" I asked with a kind smile.

"Nettle tea, thanks," said one of the wizards, a comfortable man with a bushy grey moustache and same colour hair.

"Um, I'd like some eggnog, please. After all, it's Christmas soon," said the other wizard who looked much younger than the other. He had brown hair with a touch of red to it and soft brown eyes.

"I'll be right back," I said and walked to the kitchen. "Eggnog and nettle tea, Edward--"

"I know, I know," said the innkeeper with a smirk. Edward was a kind man. He respected his costumers and didn't care what sorts came to his inn. "Everyone's welcome," he reminded me often, "no one should feel unwanted."

I exited the kitchen and walked back behind the bar, looking at the two strangers now and then. They were talking to each other in calm voices. Though, I couldn't hear anything they said. It was odd how two men could be so cheery in those days, with all the danger that lured. But I admired it. I admired how they could just forget the world outside.

When Edward came with their drinks I brought them to their table. "There you go," I said and smiled once again.

"Ta, thanks, darlin'," said the elder man and sipped of his nettle tea contently.

"Do you want a room, gentlemen?"

"John won't be staying, but I'd like a room," said the younger man.

"Ah, and I might as well get home to me better half. Don't want teh get a rebuke t'night!" said John and stood up. He used a Drying spell on his cloak and boots, stood up and pulled his cloak back on. "I'll see yer sometime later, Keen."

"Merry Christmas!" said the other as the elder wizard exited the inn.

"Isn't Keen a rather strange name, sir? And for a Scot? If you don't mind me asking?" I asked, grabbing a key from the small chest by the bar.

"Just something they call me. Name's Kieran. And, I'm probably more English 'an Scottish anyway. Most of my family comes from England," he said and smiled.

I smiled bashfully, feeling a small blush showing on my face. I had never met a man who had actually been nice. It was such a nice opposition to how the Death Eaters had acted towards me. "Room 4, Sir," I said and handed him the key. "Do you wish to pay for your stay now?"

"Just write me up. I'll be staying for the holidays," said Kieran.

"Breakfast in your room?"

"That would be lovely. Now, if you don't mind, I'd like to head to bed. G'night!"

"Goodnight, sir." I'm actually impressed I remembered how to be polite...

-

I finished closing up for the night and watched Edward for a moment as he put brooms to work, sweeping the floor. With another flick of his hand the chairs stacked up on top of the tables while cloths cleaned the counter of the bar. He was a talented wizard, very good at wandless magic and nonverbal spells, which was useful.

"I'm off to bed, Edward," I said and dried off my hands with a towel.

"Sure," Edward said and sent me a quick glance.

I sighed and looked round the room, spotting a cloak by one of the tables. Kieran had apparently forgotten it. I picked it up and walked upstairs. I headed towards room 4 and knocked on the door. Soon after, it was opened. "Excuse me, but you forgot your--" I trailed off seeing he wore no shirt. I quickly looked away. "You... you forgot your cloak..." I said and gave him his cloak.

"Thanks," Kieran said. "...You aren't blushing, are you?" he asked and raised a brow.

"N-no... of course not. Goodnight, sir!" I quickly turned on my heel and walked down the corridor, entered my room and shut the door. I'm sure my face was completely red of embarrassment. I shook my head and stepped away from the door after locking it. When I walked further into the room I sat down on my bed.

I gasped all of a sudden when flames appeared in mid-air and a small piece of parchment fell to the floor. I stared at it and eventually ventured towards it, bending down to pick it up. My face turned into one of horror when I read the words written in black ink:

_Beware of the shadows.__  
You are a walking dead, Iris Halither._


	13. Seeing the Foreseen 13

**Disclaimer:** See the first chapter.

**Background:** See the first chapter.

**Summary:** In the dark times when the Dark Lord returned to power, he searched for new followers and wished to regain what had been lost. But did all of his Death Eaters join him of free will? Iris Halither looks back and tells her tale, and discovers a horrible truth about herself...

**Note:** The story is divided into chapters, the chapters shaped into parts. One part is seven chapters, no matter the lengths of those. Some chapters are short, some are long. That's how they were written.

**-**

**The Tale of a Death Eater  
Part II: Se****eing the Foreseen  
Chapter 13**

**-**

I dropped the note and backed away in fright. Who had sent me the threat? It could either be a Death Eater... or _him_. I didn't know much about such magic. How could it appear exactly in the room I was in? It had to be advanced magic.

I walked to the small bathroom, opened for the water and splashed it in my face, wincing as the cold shock of it struck me. My hands were shaking and my jaw was quivering as I dried my face with a small towel. Was it possible they could find me? How could they?

Re-entering my bedroom I looked at the small pile of my Death Eater robes in a corner. I gathered them in my arms and walked to the fireplace. Taking a last glance at the black fabric, I first threw my cloak inside, watching as it slowly caught fire. Next I took the wand that Bella had given Malfoy, broke it on the middle and threw it inside. Then I looked at the white mask in my hands. After a last moment of hesitation, I cast that in the flames as well...

There went the last bits of my dark secret. I watched them burn till the last charred bits had turned to ashes. A certain relief filled me now that the physical evidence was gone. Alas, it was then I remembered the Dark Mark on my left arm. I pulled up the white sleeve of my new maid-robes, gazing upon the scar-like mark. I couldn't keep hiding it forever. Someone would find out at some point. It had to be _gone_.

With definite resolution I walked to the bedside table. Opening the drawer I found a knife I had taken from the kitchen for protection, since the wand was little help. I walked back into the bathroom and glanced at myself briefly in the mirror before I stepped closer to the sink. Pulling my sleeve further up, I clutched the knife tightly with grave determination. After taking a couple of deep, calming breaths, I gathered enough courage... and drew the blade over my arm.

I winced as I made several cuts across the mark, crimson droplets gushing from the slits. When the mark was rendered unrecognisable I dropped the knife and pulled out a small bottle containing a potion from my pocket. I had stolen it from Snape's storeroom back at the Headquarters and had kept it close to me if it should become needed. When I poured the potion onto the cuts, they immediately stopped bleeding and turned into white scar-tissue. I clutched my arm as pain still pulsed through me.

Hobbling over to my bed I sat down, glancing out of the window on the wall to the left. Opposite my bed was the fireplace where small remains of fire crackled softly. To my right was the door that led to the slender corridor on the other side.

I lay down on the mattress, holding my sore arm close. A dark shadow loomed inside me, making my heart flutter in plead for escape. 'Cause escape was all I wanted. Freedom from the darkness that had its toll on me. Freedom from the darkness that caged me and tangled me in its dangerous web. "You won't get me," I whispered, a few lone tears forming in my eyes. "You won't..."

-

Edward seemed to notice my change in behaviour. Yes, change I did. But not like you may think. I was more cheerful than I had ever been. It's true. I simply put everything behind me, forgot about the Death Eaters and the Dark Lord, forgot about the note, oh yes, simply just let it be in the past.

"Someone seems in a holiday cheer," Edward said one evening with a mischievous grin, and I just smiled back and continued serving the guests.

"How do you celebrate Christmas Eve here?" that Kieran fellow asked me when I served him his dinner. "Anything special?"

"I don't know," I answered, "I haven't been here that long."

"Oh? What've you been doing before, then?"

"I've... been out of work. I was happy to find a place like Edward's," I lied.

"You live here, don't you? In a room upstairs?"

"Yes..."

"How come? Don't you know some nice bloke in town?"

"I haven't lived in Edinburgh for very long. I moved here the same time I got the job," I said. "And, no. I don't know anyone here at all."

"That's sad, a pretty girl like you," he said with a toothy grin.

"I... Thank you," I muttered, blushing.

-

Later that evening I took a break and went for a walk. I wasn't really all that familiar with the streets of Edinburgh, but I sort of felt at home anywhere I walked. I strode to the park beneath the steep cliffs upon which the Edinburgh Castle had its place. I stopped and looked up at its ancient walls. For a brief moment it almost felt like I was gazing at Hogwarts...

It was getting dark fast, snow falling from the dark clouds which were nearly invisible amongst the black of the sky. The sun had set after mere minutes, and I knew I had to get back to the inn before questionable sorts of Muggles and wizards alike would start roaming the night.

I pulled the warm winter-cloak Edward had given me tighter around my body and kept walking. To keep out of sight, I avoided well-lit areas and only moved in the shadows. Lone cars drove by now and then, though they did not pay any attention to me. When someone would pass by, I would shrink and hide my face - simply catch as little interest as possible.

After some time I looked around, feeling a little lost. I had walked further than I had noticed and didn't recognise my surroundings. Feeling slight panic rise in my throat, I leaned against a wall and took a couple of deep breaths, assuring myself I couldn't be that much out of course.

"...Are you completely sure that--"

"Shut up, Dolohov, of course I'm sure. I'm never wrong..."

"I could think of a _couple_ of occasions--"

"I said, shut up!"

My breath caught in my chest and I'm most certain I didn't breathe at all. It couldn't be. It just couldn't. It was _impossible_... or, that's what I wanted it to be. I quickly turned down an alley and crouched by a dustbin, clutching a hand over my mouth and nose to stifle my increased breathing. I peered from behind the dustbin and saw the outlines of two men passing the alleyway.

"The others must already be there by now," came the irritated voice of Antonin Dolohov as he stopped. _Walk away, walk away,_ I kept praying to myself.

"I _know_ where we're going..." This voice I did not recognise, though I could tell it was a man. But it had such sense of calm it made me shiver uncomfortably. I knew this man, but I couldn't tell who it was in my state of shock.

I moved my foot, trying to get out of my cramped position. I let out a muffled gasp when I hit the dustbin and a metallic noise resounded.

"What was that?" said Dolohov. He pulled out his wand and moved closer to my hide, the shadows moving over his white Death Eater mask. I closed my other hand so tightly I felt blood surface from the pressure of my nails. Just in my damn good luck a cat appeared from a dustbin and ran out of the alley with a loud wail.

"Oh, _come on_," said the other Death Eater and continued walking. Dolohov lingered a moment and then followed the other.

I let out a strangled sound when they were gone, dragging myself back on my feet. I slipped out of the alley and looked about frantically, walking swiftly on my way to the inn when I came to realise where I was, knowing I couldn't arrive there as fast as I wanted to.

I went to the backdoor of the kitchen, shuffling around in my pocket in search of my key. Getting hold of it, I slowly put it inside the lock, turned it and tiptoed inside. When I entered the kitchen I was stunned to find it deserted, the lights turned off and several kitchen tools lying abandoned.

"Edward?" I spoke and pulled down my hood. I moved towards the door to the tap room and opened it a little, glancing inside carefully. My eyes widened at the sight of overturned tables and broken chairs. "What's happened?" I whispered hoarsely, a knowing but unwelcome feeling deep down in my stomach.

Seeing no one, I walked inside with light feet, keeping on my watch. I jumped when I heard a low groan. Looking to my right, I gasped when I saw Edward lying by the bar, weak and bloodied up. I hurried to his side and took a better look at him. Awful... "Edward... what happened?" I asked him, hoping he had strength enough to speak. I pulled off my scarf and wiped some blood off his face, smiling softly at him as he opened his eyes.

"...D-Death Eaters..." he croaked, blood dripping down his lips. "Here... now..."

"They're still here?" I said, nervously glancing over my shoulder. "I'm sorry," I said. "I'm _so_ sorry, Edward. I truly am. I had hoped--" I cut off when the sound of footsteps came from the upper floor. Lifting my head, I looked at the ceiling as if following the sound with my eyes. I looked into Edward's bloodshot eyes, tears appearing in my own. "I truly am sorry, Edward," I spoke, choking on my words.

"...Why...?" The word left his bloody lips, his strangled breath turning into a shaky cough.

"They w-want _me_ because... because... I'm one of them," I said in a whisper, softly dragging him further behind the counter so we wouldn't be spotted immediately should someone come down. "But I swear to you that I never, _ever_ wanted to be a Death Eater. I _swear_. You have to believe me. Oh, Edward, please forgive me--"

"Kill me..."

I stopped talking and looked at him, just realising I had looked away. "...What?" I whispered, my stomach turning in disgust at the intense smell of his beaten body.

"Kill me... before... they d-do," he hissed. "I'm... close to d-death... anyway..." He lifted his bruised hand and pointed at the kitchen knife below the counter.

I whimpered and stared at the knife before turning my gaze back to him, knowing what he wanted me to do with it. "Please don't ask me to... to..."

"I'm... begging you..."

I whimpered again and slowly reached for the knife, briefly thinking back to the night I destroyed the mark on my arm. Choking sounds left my chest as I raised the knife and pressed the tip of the knife softly where his heart should be.

I looked into Edward's eyes, tears streaming down my cheeks. "Goodbye," I whispered, his hands finding my own on the handle of the knife before I swiftly pushed it into his chest, piercing his heart. I kept holding his hands in mine as a few last suffocated breaths left his lips before his life slipped away entirely. "Those monsters..." I wept softly. "Those evil _monsters_..."

I shakily removed the blood-dripping knife from his chest and dropped it. Rubbing my neck anxiously I rose and looked towards the stair. I didn't care anymore. I simply didn't care. They had murdered Edward - for no reason. And I had been the one to set him free...

Bending down I searched Edward's pockets with my bloodstained hands, finding his wand. Clutching it tightly between my fingers I moved towards the stair. The anger was seething through my veins, making my actions unknown to my better sense. I steadily moved up the stair, my right hand wrapped so tightly around the wand my fingers turned white. I reached the upper floor, looking around. "You killed him!" I screeched, striding down the hall, wanting them to hear me. "You killed him, you _bastards_!"

"No," sounded a voice behind me. I turned around and saw Fenrir Greyback stand there with a ferocious look on his face. He stood by the stair, holding the knife I had used moments before. "_You did_," he said and licked some of Edward's blood off the blade, smiling broadly as he did.

I stared at him, loathing him with my entire being. I snarled and ran towards him, the wand in my hand pointed at his throat. The werewolf laughed as he gripped my wrists, swung me around as if in a dance and pushed me against the wall harshly, making me yelp at the pain.

"Let go!" I hissed, gritting my teeth.

"That's it!" Greyback laughed with a manic look in his eyes. "Show it to me! _Show me the hate_!" His fingers were wrapped all the way around my wrists, thin as they were, and it felt like he could break the bones easily. I yelled at the pain, the wand falling from my hand. "You're weak, _Halither_," he sneered and pressed me against the wall, his strong body preventing me from escaping.

Surprise showed in my eyes when he spilled my name. "How did you--"

"And stupid, too. You can't hide from me. I know your scent too well," said Greyback, leaning close to sniff my neck. I cringed in disgust, fright now evident in me. He loved to scare me. Sometimes I even think he simply loved to _see_ me scared. "But don't worry," he said, a little too close to my face, "I'm not here for you..."

I turned a bit away from him, trying to get some distance. "...Then why would you be here?" I said, swallowing a bit.

He grinned from ear to ear and flicked his tongue teasingly at me. "Just wanted a li'l snack," he said, snapping his jaws, starting me. "In fact, I had no idea you'd be here--"

"_You_... did that to Edward?" I asked, feeling tears again.

"I confess," Greyback said with fake pity.

"You're a beast..." I uttered.

"Dear, dear Iris... I _live_ to be one! But yes. I'm not here to... collect you. Meeting you is just a bonus in my fun! So do not worry, girly, I won't tell on you." He smirked and looked me up and down. "You look quite healthy," he stated, "more so than when I last had the... pleasure of your company. And I like your hair..." He picked up a lock of my black hair, twirling it around his fingers.

"Why aren't there a-any others...?" I stuttered.

"Left after searching the rooms. Wanted to see if there were any objects of interest, I guess," he said with a shrug. "But I lingered to see if there were any hiding goods left," he said and laughed. "And I'm happy I did. Met you, didn't I?" I gave him a disgusted look and turned my head, looking at the floor. He only laughed louder.

"Hey! You there!" a voice came from the stair, tearing Greyback's attention away from me.

I looked at him as he glimpsed at the stair. Then he turned to look at me again. "Until we meet again, girly..." He smirked at me, a film of blood covering his teeth which made me want to gag. Then he winked, blew me a kiss and Apparated to who knows where.

Running steps thundered from the stair and less than two seconds later, Kieran stood before me. "Are you all right?" he asked, searching my eyes, worried.

"I'm fine," I said in a voice a little more than above a whisper.

"Death Eaters... _here_... Merlin," said the young man, running his hands through his auburn hair desperately. "I just went visiting a friend, and... I saw the Dark Mark hovering above the inn when I decided to return. Are you sure you're all right?"

"I'm fine. Really, I am... but... Edward's dead..."

"Don't worry. It'll all be okay. I contacted some Aurors and they'll be here any minute. It'll all be okay. Trust me. It's going to fine."

"I would wish it to be so... I really would..."

-

**Author's note:** Woo. What a heavy one, this chapter. Not just the length, but emotionally heavy too. I remember writing this so clearly. Got semi-depressed halfway through. I guess that's why I think it seems to _true_ to me, you know? Because I was so deep into it.


	14. Seeing the Foreseen 14

**Disclaimer:** See the first chapter.

**Background:** See the first chapter.

**Summary:** In the dark times when the Dark Lord returned to power, he searched for new followers and wished to regain what had been lost. But did all of his Death Eaters join him of free will? Iris Halither looks back and tells her tale, and discovers a horrible truth about herself...

**Note:** The story is divided into chapters, the chapters shaped into parts. One part is seven chapters, no matter the lengths of those. Some chapters are short, some are long. That's how they were written.

**-**

**The Tale of a Death Eater  
Part II: Se****eing the Foreseen  
Chapter 14**

**-**

"Drink... it helps..."

I coughed when the sharp taste of liquor tainted my tongue. Tears pricked my eyelids at the bitterness of it and I hit my chest a couple of times, swallowing it down. Frowning at the aftertaste of the drink, I looked up at Kieran, rubbing my forehead lightly. "You know, you never told me your full name..."

"My real name is Kiethan Orwyn, but... I prefer Kieran. Kiethan was my uncle's name," he said, folding his hands on top of the table.

"Not a favoured one, then," I assumed.

He didn't respond to that. His eyes glinted with light amusement and he said, "I don't believe I ever got your name, though?"

"No. You didn't. I'm Iris... Iris Dauntell..."

"Pretty name. Wouldn't have thought it to be any other way, though."

I blushed and looked around so he wouldn't notice. Though, I think he did anyway...

We were at a small pub in a deserted part of Edinburgh. Kieran had suggested I needed a drink on top of what had happened. Soon after he'd found me at the inn, Aurors had arrived. They covered up Edward's body and then started searching round the inn... of course finding _nothing_.

I looked back at Kieran and found him staring at me with a speculative look upon his face, and I instantly knew what was on his mind. "Please don't ask me what happened," I groaned and closed my eyes. "I bear not speak of it."

"Understandable," he said, "but if you should ever feel need--"

"No," I answered sharply. "Besides, I hadn't been there for long when you came. I didn't see anything happen, and therefore my information is no good." My fingers played with the edges of my sleeves as I turned my gaze towards my brimming drink. I was still wearing the clothes I wore at the inn, plain brown robes with a white shirt underneath, faintly stained by Edward's blood. But it was all I had.

"Where will you be staying now?" asked Kieran, sipping of his whiskey.

I shrugged and looked out of the window, twisting my now bloodless hands restlessly in my lap. "I don't have anywhere to go. But I can't stay in Edinburgh..." I said, slightly muttering the words I spilled, cursing my wavering voice.

"...I live outside Edinburgh, up north, in Inverness. You know, by Loch Ness. You can come and stay with me for a while if you so wish?" he offered, leaning forward in his seat, brows lifted slightly as he dawned a gentle smile.

"That's very kind, but I couldn't ask that of you. I'm not any good company," I said and looked at him, glancing to and fro between his eyes.

"Nonsense! You won't be a bother. You just come with me and get your nerves down. Stay low for a while, resurface. It takes time to forget such... tragedies..."

"I can't forget. I mustn't. It wouldn't be fair to Edward. He did so much for me. But I thank you. I admit I do need some time to think. And it's either coming with you or staying on the street," I said, slightly pursing my lips. I hated being poor. It was so humiliating to have to accept help from others. It was degrading.

"That's settled, then. You're staying with me."

-

"Well, here we are," Kieran said, smiling widely when a small house of stone revealed itself amongst the trees of a small forest. Many of the houses - or huts - in that area of Inverness were built in stone, because they had been there since once-upon-a-time. Though, neighbours were not what Kieran had so many of. There were practically no other houses in sight. "I know it's not much," said the bloke, turning to me, "but it's home."

"Heard that one before," I said, thinking back at the Malfoy Mansion with irony. Kieran's house suited the saying so much better. It was two storeys; the upper floor was most likely to be a bedroom, for there wasn't _possibly_ room for more. But Kieran, being one man, probably needed no more than that. Well... it was more than I had, anyway...

"Feel free to explore," said Kieran as he unlocked the door. He stepped aside and let me enter before he closed and locked the door. I noticed he glanced out of the window by the door, but brushed it off as nothing.

The room we had entered was a slim hallway barely wide enough for two people to stand shoulder to shoulder. On the right were two doors, the one closest to the front door leading to a small office, the other leading to a living room.

On the left were also two doors, the farthest leading to an incredibly clean kitchen, the other to a bathroom. The narrow hallway ended in a stair to the first floor.

"Um... you can sleep on the couch in the living room... until I figure out something better," he said, struggling a bit with his words.

"No, the couch is fine," I got out, forcing a smile to form on my lips.

Kieran sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. "Just roam the kitchen if you're hungry. I'll get you some blankets and a pillow," he said and walked up the stair.

I stood there for a moment before I moved towards the kitchen. To be honest... I was lost. There were different sorts of tools and machines in his kitchen, and I wouldn't know the use for any of them. And, many of the things I had never seen in my life.

"Gotten any further than entering the bloody room?" I heard Kieran chuckle behind me. He already knew I wasn't good with magic. How could he not? I had to tell him when we Apparated to Inverness... Correction, when _he_ Apparated _us_ to Inverness.

My eyes narrowed in a glare, thin lips tightening. "It's just, you have so many... _things_," I said, picking up an object with two thin holes in it.

"That's a toaster," he said. "It's a Muggle invention."

I nearly dropped the damn thing and quickly put it back down. "A... what?" I asked and turned to him, a bit shocked.

"A toaster."

"Not that. The other--"

"It's a Muggle invention. My parents were Muggles. But I'm not that bad of a wizard. My parents were quite surprised when I got my letter, to say the least. I know a lot of both worlds," he said, sitting down by the small kitchen table.

"You're a... Muggle-born?" I asked, fascination gleaming in my eyes. It was odd to think about. I mean, me being a fleeing pure-blood Death Eater, living with a Muggle-born wizard. Quite out of the ordinary, I'd say.

"I grew up in Edinburgh, actually," he said, nodding as he spoke.

"Why did you leave?"

"I guess I wanted something calmer than a crowded city. I like the quiet out here." He looked at the floor for a moment, as if hesitating to say something. "Ah, how about some food now?"

I looked at him wonderingly for a moment. "That would be nice."

-

I lay on my side on the couch in the living room, gazing into the flames of the softly crackling fire in the fireplace. I had been like that for a while; wrapped up in the blankets Kieran had given me. Thoughts filled my mind, keeping me awake. I wondered if Greyback had kept his promise and kept our encounter secret. I wondered why Kieran had looked so cautiously out the window when we arrived. I wondered what was going on at the Malfoy Mansion just then.

So many different things kept running through my head, sending my mind into a confused spin. I was curious for the answers I knew I wouldn't get. But that's the nature of mankind. We're a curious species.

Slowly, I pulled up my sleeve and glared at the unrecognisable Dark Mark. The scars looked terrible. If you didn't know I had done it myself, you might think I'd been bitten by a dog or something the like.

But looking at the mark, I suddenly smiled. Never again. Never would I have to return. I knew I was safe with Kieran close, even though he was a Muggle. I knew they couldn't find me.


	15. The Halcyon Days 15

**Disclaimer:** See the first chapter.

**Background:** See the first chapter.

**Summary:** In the dark times when the Dark Lord returned to power, he searched for new followers and wished to regain what had been lost. But did all of his Death Eaters join him of free will? Iris Halither looks back and tells her tale, and discovers a horrible truth about herself...

**Note:** The story is divided into chapters, the chapters shaped into parts. One part is seven chapters, no matter the lengths of those. Some chapters are short, some are long. That's how they were written.

**-**

**The Tale of a Death Eater  
Part III:**** The Halcyon Days  
Chapter 15**

**-**

I woke late in the afternoon the following day, pondering why Kieran had not awaked me. The sun had already set, and it was snowing outside. I searched the kitchen and the office, but Kieran was nowhere in sight. Calling his name gave the same result. Standing at the bottom of the stair I looked into the shadows. "Looking can't do any harm," I muttered and ventured up the creaking steps.

The upper floor was as abandoned as downstairs. The lights were off, and I fumbled with a matchbox I had taken from the living room. Managing to bring a small flame to life, I squinted in the dark, seeing the outlines of a door ahead of me. I reached forward until my hand touched the surface and felt for the handle, pressing it down carefully once I found it. The room I entered had a musky scent to it, all the greater to exemplify the house of a male. Clothes were scattered here and there, but apart from that the room was rather neat. I walked further inside, closing the door soundlessly behind me.

Kieran's bedroom wasn't very furnished. A double bed filled the wall opposite the door. A small desk and a wardrobe lined the wall to my right, and opposite that was an old wooden chest. Manoeuvring my way past the discarded clothes my gaze kept returning to the chest, and I eventually tiptoed over to it, kneeling down. Curiosity getting the better of me, my hands slid along the decorated lid. I lifted the heavy lid, grunting slightly with the effort. Worn travelling robes, tattered photographs, dusty files containing yellowed documents and so much more... It all seemed to be memories put aside.

My brow furrowed as I moved some pieces of parchment aside, gathering a big photo in my hands. It was a wizard photo, for the figures were moving. It seemed to be a... wedding. The groom and the bride were smiling at the photographer, kissing each other every once in a while. Three men beside the happy couple stood out in the photo as well - one smiling beamingly, one courteously and the little one shyly with reddening cheeks. I put the picture away, feeling like it was wrong of me to look at them. But my curious eyes grew wider as I spotted the groom and the man, who had been smiling widely in the wedding photo, in several other pictures - and I wondered who they were.

"My, aren't you the assiduous explorer..."

I jumped and yelped when the heavy lid fell over my fingers, crushing them. Trying to assuage the pain by rubbing my fingers, I looked up to see Kieran leaning against the door, a suspicious look upon his face.

"I... didn't mean to offend you or anything... I was just--"

"Curious."

"Well, yes. You weren't here when I woke, so I wanted see if you had any sort of cards I could entertain myself with," I lied, leaning against the chest as I got to my feet. I know it wasn't the greatest lie in the world. But I couldn't just blurt out "I wanted to see what kind of underwear you use" or something like it... hrm...

"Ah... I doubt you would find any in there, though?"

I looked at the chest, knowing very well he knew I was lying. "Look... I was just curious. I mean, you haven't really told me anything about whom you are, except from that you're a Muggle-born. You can't expect me not to come up here eventually!" I have no idea why I said that. To gather distrust with him was something I'd much rather avoid doing.

"I know," said Kieran, making all emotions but surprise disappear from my features.

"Then how come you didn't lock your door?" I said quizzically.

"No lock," he said, moving away from the door. "I could have used my wand, but... I didn't find it necessary." My brows furrowed with slight embarrassment. "...But I suppose you would like to know why I have those things hidden away within a chest?"

"Of course..." I said with a shrug.

"Go ahead," he said, motioning for me to open it. I looked at him for a moment, hesitating. Then I bent down again and lifted the lid, pressuring my far too weak muscles. As I sat down on my knees I felt Kieran move around, his presence behind me somewhat discomforting. He sat beside me, picking up the wedding picture I'd been looking at before. "The Potters' wedding," he muttered, smiling sadly.

"You knew them?" I asked, my attention being all on him hearing it was of the Potters.

"Not personally. I was rather young back then, when they got married."

I looked into the chest again. "What are these?" I said, picking up a couple of the files.

"Work," he answered shortly, taking them from my hands. "Just some paperwork I never really got rid of..." He placed the files back inside the chest and glanced up at me. Then he rose, rolling his shoulders as if he had a stiff neck. "Now... care to go for a drink...?"

-

Incredibly enough there was a wizard tavern in Inverness. It was located very close to the black water of Loch Ness, hidden well by trees. And just like where Kieran lived, the tavern was placed in a poorly inhabited area, keeping the magical visitors' whereabouts secret.

As we arrived at the tavern a small snowstorm had picked up, and my short black-coloured hair was sticking to my scalp because of the melting snowflakes. I followed Kieran to a table, sat down and draped my cloak over the back of the chair.

"Why did you change it?" asked Kieran once we'd ordered our drinks.

"Change what?" I asked, lifting my eyebrows with a passive smile.

"Your name..."

The cold-bitten colour drained from my face until I was as pale as the white snow outside. "W-what do you mean? My name has always been Iris..."

"But not your last name, though. Used to be Halither... didn't it?"

I looked around frantically, hoping no one had heard him. I knew there was no point in lying. He knew who I was... "How did you find out?" I asked, completely unnerved. "_Who told you_?"

"I saw this..." He reached into his pocket and pulled out a piece of parchment with a picture on it and some text below. My eyes widened when I saw my own face in the picture. I tore the poster out of his hand, staring at it in disbelief.

"Merlin..." I whispered, trying to swallow my nervousness. "Where... where did you see this?"

"In Hogsmeade," said Kieran, the cold edge of his tone clear. "The streets are filled with Death Eater posters. Your face happened to be amongst them..."

My breath caught in my throat and I gulped several times, wishing I could find a strong voice. "Kieran... Please... I beg you, _don't_ tell anyone. _Please_ don't. I swear I never joined _him_ of free will. I know you don't know me well, but believe me when I say I truly didn't become a Death Eater because I wanted to," I stuttered, keeping my voice as low as possible. "Please... I... I don't want to go back to Azkaban! Please..." I looked pleadingly up at him, stubbornly holding my tears even though they threatened to come.

"Who could prove I've ever met you, anyway?" said Kieran, a tiny smile showing on his face.

-

**Author's note:** Hope you all enjoyed this. More to come soon. ♥ Thanks to Evil Riggs and Rock Royalty for reviewing!

**Evil Riggs:** Hahah, yes, I suppose they all will eventually.

**Rock Royalty: **Thank you! Yeah, if you ask me, Fenrir isn't given a lot of credit. I took a morbid liking to him when he was introduced, and even more so when he appeared in the end of HBP. I think he suits this story and Iris' character, don't you? And, a small amount of reviews _can_ be discouraging, but every one I get makes me all the happier. Again, it inspires me to write more! Rock on, mate!


	16. The Halcyon Days 16

**D****isclaimer:** See the first chapter.

**Background:** See the first chapter.

**Summary:** In the dark times when the Dark Lord returned to power, he searched for new followers and wished to regain what had been lost. But did all of his Death Eaters join him of free will? Iris Halither looks back and tells her tale, and discovers a horrible truth about herself...

**Note:** The story is divided into chapters, the chapters shaped into parts. One part is seven chapters, no matter the lengths of those. Some chapters are short, some are long. That's how they were written.

**-**

**The Tale of a Death Eater  
Part III:**** The Halcyon Days  
Chapter 16**

**-**

"You have no idea of how grateful I am..."

"I think I can imagine," said Kieran, his hands buried in the pockets of his light-brown cloak. "But why didn't you tell me before?"

"It's just... I don't know who to trust these days... Everything's so messed up and it seems the only way to ensure my safety is to be on my own," I said, repeatedly flicking the falling snow out of my sight as we continued down the lone gravel road. We had left the tavern some time before, and our walk seemed to get longer with each step. We should have Apparated... but the peacefulness of the still surroundings was just what I needed.

"How did it happen...?"

"...What?" I asked warily.

"How did you become a supporter of... You-Know-Who?"

_"...And how would you even be able to live on, knowing I'm keeping an eye on your doings? What would happen to your future husband, if ever such luck, if I should find that you've told him too much? Think about the future, Halither. You must always look ahead and be prepared..."_

His words lingered in my mind. I rubbed my left arm tenderly, close to where the scars were. I cleared my throat uncomfortably and looked at my moving feet. "I... don't like to talk about it," I muttered.

_"...Merlin can't help you here! He's dead and he was _weak_. Good people don't survive in this world, girly. You have to fight to achieve your rights and reach your goals now. You better get used to it if you want to be a true Death Eater..."_

Greyback was wrong. I was no true Death Eater. I never wanted to be one. But I had to remember the things that made me who I was. They were a reminder that I couldn't be like everybody else... That was what I really wanted, wasn't it? _To be normal_. Of course, normal in a witch-sense, but still... And come to think about it, my life was completely opposite of how I wanted it to be...

_"...Not only can I make you rich and powerful, Halither... Most of all, I can make you forget. Forget the pain and the memories you've lived with all of your life. You want to get rid of them, don't you? You want it all to go away...?"_

"Are you alright?" it sounded from Kieran, his voice breaking my line of thoughts.

"Huh? Oh... yeah... I'm fine..."

"You look very pale," he noticed, wrinkling his forehead. "You sure you're okay?"

"Yeah, yeah," I said irritated and rubbed the back of my neck.

-

I gladly accepted the towel from Kieran, a feeling of exhaustion coming over me as I seated myself on the red-and-green-striped couch, quite content as he brought flames to life in the large logs in the fireplace. I bent down with my head between my legs, roughly drying my hair with the towel where after I smoothed it with my hands, combing it with my fingers.

"You looked different," it sounded from Kieran when he rose from his position, the fire crackling softly behind him.

"What do you mean?" I asked as I shook off my boots, pulling my knees to my chest to rest my feet on the couch as well.

"On the poster. You looked different than you do now. You look... healthier," he said and sat down in a dark-green armchair opposite me.

I looked at my blurred reflection in a frost-flower decorated window on the wall to my right. The short black hair was so much different from my before dark-blonde hair, which had reached below the perhaps too sharp roll of my hips. "I suppose," I muttered, looking back at him. "Look, I... I'm really tired... It was a long walk--"

"I'll let you get some rest," Kieran finished and stood up. "Goodnight."

"G'night," I whispered and watched him leave the room, listening to the sound of him ascending the creaking stair. Hearing the door to his bedroom close, I shrugged off my robes and unbuttoned the top of my white shirt. Then, I retrieved the sheet, blanket and pillow from under the couch, finished up and closed my eyes as I went to sleep.

-

The Dark Mark cast its sickly green glow down upon me. It hovered there, over the house. Somehow the house seemed familiar, though I'd never seen it before. It felt like _home_.

Looking around I found myself in a blooming garden. The grass had a flush green, like it was early summer, and the sky which played host for the mark was fresh and clear, holding memories of just fallen rain. Trees decorated the garden, weeping willows and elderly oaks as well as fruit trees covered in small white and pink flowers. The garden itself was surrounded by apple trees so low they resembled bushes, and beautiful flowers - all of white - edged their way along the outer walls of the house.

A nagging feeling overwhelmed me as I once more raised my gaze to the Dark Mark, drawing a frightened flutter in my chest, and I ventured towards the house. Creeping alongside the white wooden-walls I found my way to the front of the house, a strange thought telling me I had a key. And indeed, as soon as my hand found the inside of my pocket, I was surprised to actually find one.

Confused beyond my logic I tried the door... the key fit.

More intense the nagging feeling became as I carefully entered the house, hesitating shortly when the door creaked. My shoes clicked softly against the floorboards as I moved through the slender hall. I stopped in front of the entrance of another room, finding the door ajar. Slowly, I pushed it open the rest of the way, glanced to and fro to see if anyone was inside. It looked like a dining room, and walking further into the room I spotted the wide and arched entrance to a kitchen, no door.

I frowned at the sight of overturned chairs, wondering what had happened. Reaching the opposite wall my eyes widened, seeing it stained with blood. Horrified, I rushed out of the room and shut the door after me, leaning against it with heaving chest. The sound of footsteps reached my ears and I looked towards the stair down the hall, deciding to go to the first floor. I reached into my pocket, shocked when finding no wand. Where was it? Where was the wand I had taken from Edward's body? How come it wasn't in my pocket?

The floor of a room down the narrow corridor creaked, revealing that I was indeed not alone in the house... and my curiosity pulled me in the direction of the room's half-open door. Moving along the wall I stopped when reaching the door frame, staying out of sight. Hearing no more motion I dared to move in front of the door, nudging it open. No one. About to turn around I froze, a rustling noise sounding behind me. I turned back and blinked when spotting a cradle by the far wall. What in the world...?

My feet led me towards the cradle. It was wooden, painted white with adorable patterns carved into the sides of it. Its hangings were draped over the edges, hiding that which lay inside. Carefully, I drew them away... A child. A small infant lay there, rustling about with a frown upon its face, asleep.

Something moved behind my back, and I turned. A man stood there, looking from me to the infant. He seemed familiar... But it was as if his face was blurred, shadowed, for I could not identify his character. He smirked at me and grabbed his wand, flicking it, sending me flying into the wall. I winced as I fell in a heap of limbs on the floor. The man moved towards the cradle, gazing intensely at the infant. I watched him, frozen in the spot, as he pointed his wand at its tiny form. "_No_!" I screamed... but no sound left my lips...

-

I opened my eyes and jumped up, breathing heavily. Looking around I was still on the couch in Kieran's living room. I whipped my hand across my damp forehead, my brows knitting in puzzlement.

"A dream," I whispered, exhaling sharply as I dropped back onto the pillow. "Just a dream..."


	17. The Halcyon Days 17

**Disclaimer:** See the first chapter.

**Background:** See the first chapter.

**Summary:** In the dark times when the Dark Lord returned to power, he searched for new followers and wished to regain what had been lost. But did all of his Death Eaters join him of free will? Iris Halither looks back and tells her tale, and discovers a horrible truth about herself...

**Note:** The story is divided into chapters, the chapters shaped into parts. One part is seven chapters, no matter the lengths of those. Some chapters are short, some are long. That's how they were written.

**-**

**The Tale of a Death Eater  
Part III:**** The Halcyon Days  
Chapter 17**

**-**

"Hungry?" Kieran asked when I entered the kitchen a bit later that morning, grogginess visible in every movement I made.

"No thanks," I muttered, taking a seat by the kitchen table.

"You need to eat," he persisted, "so you can get some strength in that body."

My eyes narrowed and I glared at him through tired eyes. "And what's that supposed to mean?" I snapped as he placed a plate of food in front of me. Suddenly, he grabbed my wrist and pulled my arm over my neck, making me cringe at the horrible pain. "_Oooooooow_! Son of a--!"

"That, for example," he stated, sitting down with a grin on his face.

"Meanie," I muttered, rubbing my shoulder. I cringed again. "That hurt like shit!"

"Of course it did. You didn't get a chance to avoid it. Look at you, you're half asleep. And, beautiful vocabulary, by the way..."

"Well, of course I'm _half asleep_! I didn't exactly get any..." I said, poking my food with my fork.

"Bad dream?" Kieran asked, looking up at me while chewing some bacon.

"Something like that. I don't remember a lot about it, though..." It was true. Bits of the dream were still clear in my mind, but most of it had vanished when I went back to sleep. I had tried to poke my memory, to make the images reappear, yet the haze spread the more I tried to remember. But later, though...

Later it would become as awfully clear as crystal...

-

"Are you _certain_ these are normal clothes for Muggle women?" I asked for the hundredth time. I stared at myself in the small mirror above the sink, trying to make sense of my reflection.

"Positive. Come on... let me see if it fits..." Kieran said, his voice muffled by the door.

"It feels weeeird," I complained, trying to loosen the intense contact between my skin and the strange fabric covering my legs with my fingers, to no avail.

"You just need to get used to it. Come on out and let me have a look," he pleaded.

I groaned and unlocked the bathroom door. "So..." I started and stepped into the hallway, "...do I look like a Muggle?" He looked me up and down, trying to hide a growing smirk by holding his hand over his mouth in an inspective manner. "Are they really supposed to be so tight... these...?"

"Denims," he chuckled. "And, yes."

"It's an extra layer of skin," I grumbled. "The sweater is nice and warm, though," I added to be polite and smoothed my hands over the soft, red cotton. "But, I have to ask you something..." I started, looking at what he had recently changed into.

"Yes...?"

"Why are _you_ wearing demmins?"

"Denims... and, well... they're sort of both genders. Yeah..." Kieran said, stumbling over his words. I nearly laughed. Witch robes were so much comfier. I wouldn't find wizards wearing the same clothes as me... Would be funny, actually. "Want to go outside for a bit?" he suddenly asked.

I looked out the window, frowning a bit. "It's snowing..."

"More fun," he chuckled.

"But I don't exactly have a cloak for it?"

"You can borrow a winter jacket of mine."

"..._Eh_?"

"I'll show you," he said and went upstairs, returning shortly after, holding a... _thing_ in his hands. He daintily slipped it over my shoulders, and I slid my arms through. I walked back inside the bathroom to have a look at myself and snorted at the sight.

"Come on," Kieran said and walked towards the door, unlocking it with a smile.

"So what's so great about this?" I mused as he opened the door and stepped aside to let me walk past him.

"Well," he said, closing the door after us, "it's refreshing... It's beautiful out here... It's--"

"_Cold_," I cut in. "But yeah, it's _reeeeal_, bloody amazing out here. And these demmins are pretty _warm_. I wonder if the owls are freezing. I could use a coat of owl feathers right about-- OUCH!" I spun around and glared at Kieran, seeing his gloves covered in fine snow. "You have no right in the name of Merlin to throw _snowballs_!" I quipped.

"Who says I don't?"

"I just did!"

"And your word counts for one and all?" he smirked, lifting one eyebrow.

My eyes narrowed even more and a small growl sounded from my throat. "Hm!" I turned and dug my hands into the pockets of the jacket, walking a little further away from the house. That was when another snowball hit me in the back of my head.

"EH?!" I roared and turned hastily, bending down to quickly grab some snow which I pressed together and threw in Kieran's direction, watching it turn to powder on the way. He grunted loudly and looked quite amused.

That was how the snowball fight between two so unlike began.

-

"_I'm sooooooaked_..." I moaned as I dragged myself into the living room much later, leaving a trail of wet clothes behind me.

"Serves you right," Kieran stated, sitting down on the floor in front of the fireplace.

"Oh? You were the one who started!" I snapped, pulling a face at the disgusting feeling of the wet trousers sticking even more to my damp legs. It was then I officially hated demmins. At some point I let a smile show, remembering bits of the fight. "It was fun, though. Haven't ever really been in a snowball fight..."

"Really?" he asked, lifting his head from his lying position on the soft carpet to look at me.

"Mm-hmm. There was the occasional snowball in the back when I went to Hogwarts, but I didn't really have any friends. So I had no one to do such things with." He gave me a somewhat sympathetic look, which I tried to ignore. I hated when people felt pity towards me.

Kieran rose from the floor and walked over to me, sitting down beside me on the couch. "You have had a lonesome life, haven't you?" he asked softly, turning his head towards me. My eyes stayed on the floor, not really knowing how to respond. He sighed and put his hands on his knees, his eyes looking everywhere. "There's... something you ought to know," he said and drew my gaze to him in question. "I didn't ask you to come and stay with me just because of what happened in Edinburgh. I've been..." His voice trailed off in hesitation and he didn't speak for a moment, weighing his words with great care. "What you need to understand first and utmost is that you have no need to feel unease with me. You are in no danger in my company."

I frowned at his words, utterly confused. "What are you telling me?" I muttered, getting more anxious by the seconds ticking by. His moment of silence alerted me of something I knew had yet to come, and I was certain it would change things... In which ways though, I didn't know.

"I have been keeping an eye on you, Iris."

"What do you mean?" I said, jumping to my feet.

"Calm down, you don't need to be afraid. It's not as you think--"

"Show me your arm," I demanded.

Kieran sighed again, knowing what I was hinting at. He rolled up both of his sleeves and turned his arms repeatedly, a sincere look on his face as he kept his eyes on me. There was no mark on his left arm. That calmed me somewhat, yet I knew not all of _his_ supporters were Death Eaters.

"It's not as you think," Kieran repeated and rolled down his sleeves again.

"I don't know what to think," I hissed.

"You have no reason to distrust me, Iris. I have not misled you as to who I am. My name _is_ Kiethan Orwyn, Kieran because of my uncle. I do live in this house in Inverness in Scotland. I have kept your identity secret and have not betrayed your confidence in me in any way. I offered you to come here for your own safety."

"What interest would you have in my safety?" I demanded.

He smiled softly and stood up. "I think that talk calls for a drink," he said and walked into the hallway, entering the kitchen. I frowned and exited the room as well, glancing towards the front door. "It's locked with magic," it sounded from the kitchen, "and so are the windows."

I stood in the doorway of the kitchen, leaning against the frame with my arms crossed over my chest. "I thought you meant to help me, not keep me prisoner."

He looked towards me as he reached into a small kitchen cabinet to retrieve a bottle of wine. "That," he said, walking towards the kitchen table, two glasses in his other hand, "is also for your safety."

I walked over to the table, slowly, and sat down. I stared at Kieran as he poured me a glass. "And what interest would you have in my safety?" I echoed.

He sipped of his wine and looked up at me again, frowning now. "You have a choice, Iris. You don't need to be on the run if you have a place to hide."

"What do you mean?"

"You are a good person, Iris; perhaps one of the few whose great abilities were put to wrong use. There are few people who are excellent potion-brewers. Have you never considered using your qualities?"

I was silent, until it finally started to sink in. "How do you know that I'm good with potions?"

He cleared his throat and said, "That's what I meant with that I've been keeping an eye on you. I've watched you, Iris. Ever since you came to Edinburgh, ever since I saw you that day at the inn... I've watched you. It was my job."

"...Job?"

"I work at the Ministry. But I'm not an Auror, and you don't need to take that information as a threat," he added when I was about to stand. "What I mean to say is that we want to help you."

"Who are _we_?" I asked, my eyes narrowing in disbelief.


	18. The Halcyon Days 18

**Disclaimer:** See the first chapter.

**Background:** See the first chapter.

**Summary:** In the dark times when the Dark Lord returned to power, he searched for new followers and wished to regain what had been lost. But did all of his Death Eaters join him of free will? Iris Halither looks back and tells her tale, and discovers a horrible truth about herself...

**Note:** The story is divided into chapters, the chapters shaped into parts. One part is seven chapters, no matter the lengths of those. Some chapters are short, some are long. That's how they were written.

**-**

**The Tale of a Death Eater  
Part III:**** The Halcyon Days  
Chapter 18**

**-**

Kieran looked over his shoulder, glancing out of the kitchen window. "The Ministry has gone a long way, Iris - that, you must understand. When Minister Scrimgeour took over after Cornelius Fudge great change was done. He's tried to ensure safety for the Wizarding people, as well as Muggles by communicating with Muggle men of power. You-Know-Who has had terrible things done, and peace is at a great threat. As long as he's out there, who can feel safe enough to walk out their bloody door?"

"I know that. But _why_ are you telling me this?" I asked.

"Many of us have doubted the Ministry and the Minister's means. This organisation, if you will, was originally created when You-Know-Who was first at power, and was reformed as soon as word came of _his_ return, back when it was not even believed."

"That is impossible. Any covert group to take the law into its own hands would have been discovered and destroyed. I've worked at the Ministry, I know how things are," I scolded.

"But such a group interacting only for the good of people and the good of the world... that cannot be a bad thing in these days, now can it? I'm a member of this organisation because I believe that by being so I can make a difference and not be bound by the wrongly minded means from the Ministry's side."

"And what is this so-called organisation of yours, then?" I smoothed, smirking slightly.

"The Order of the Phoenix..."

All haughtiness disappeared from my features as it dawned upon me. I had heard that name before, sometime in the past... Fenrir Greyback had mentioned it. It was shortly before he had murdered Emmeline Vance, _that_ I remembered, but only faintly. And words of the Order had passed Malfoy's lips in Azkaban as well. My brows furrowed as I looked up at Kieran again.

"Is it possible to... join this Order?" I asked in a mere whisper.

-

"Iris... Iris, wake up... Wake up..."

I groaned and buried my face in the pillow. But it wasn't a pillow... I frowned and opened my eyes slightly, trying to stir myself awake. I inhaled deeply and smiled when a delightful smell reached my nostrils. I immediately snapped up when I came to realise I was leaning against Kieran, and blushed, finding that it was his scent I had breathed in.

"W-where are we?" I asked sleepily and looked around. We were sitting in a car, driving through a comfy little neighbourhood, the street lamps lit as it was already dark, being winter. I slowly began to remember climbing into the Muggle transport car.

"London," Kieran spoke.

My head snapped towards him. "London? What are we doing in _London_?" I said, frantically looking through the windows, uncomfortable yet somewhat happy about being back in the place I came from.

"This is where the Headquarters are," Kieran explained, sending me a reassuring smile.

"Ah," I uttered, wringing my hands nervously.

He noticed and laid his hand on top of mine. "You'll be fine," he said.

After some time we reached a dark street with closely lined Muggle houses and Kieran asked the driver to pull over. After paying him with strange-looking money, most likely Muggle money, he stepped onto the sidewalk and helped me climb out as well. "Look for number thirteen. That is our destination," said Kieran and started walking further down the street when the car had left.

"Why didn't you just tell him to take us further?" I asked and followed him, often glancing back because of the eerie feeling always haunting me. He didn't answer me, however, so I just started looking for the house. "There!" I said after some time, spotting a small sign displaying the number '13'. But looking to my left I saw number eleven, and beside that number ten. Where was number twelve?

Kieran dug into his inner pocket and pulled out a small piece of parchment. "Memorise this," he said and thrust it into my right hand. I looked at him, and then looked at the parchment:

_The Headquarters of the Order of the Phoenix may be__  
found at number twelve, Grimmauld Place, London._

"But, there's no number twe--" I jumped as he snatched the parchment back, drew out his wand and ignited the small note, making it crumble to ashes after few seconds.

"Repeat it in your head," said Kieran, and with a small scowl I did so. No sooner a door appeared, followed quickly by an entire house. Indeed, a walk led from the street to a battered, black-painted door with a silver knocker in the shape of a twisted serpent. As we moved closer I noticed there was neither keyhole nor letterbox. The exterior of the house was dirty and unkempt and the windows were very grimy, making it impossible in the dark to get a hint as to what was inside.

"Wow," I whispered at the sight. Kieran walked to the very front of the house, pulled out his wand and tapped the door once. Many loud, metallic clicks sounded, and possibly the clatter of a chain withdrawing.

"Inside. No touching," he said and nudged me through the doorway as the door creaked open.

The entrance hall was a large room with peeling wallpaper, threadbare carpet, gas lamps, and serpent-shaped, cobwebby candelabra. A staircase ran to the upper floors, and from what I could see in the dark there were a number of age-blackened portraits and some strange, large moth-eaten mouldy curtains hiding something I later learned not to disturb. I also spotted an umbrella stand in the hall made from a troll's leg and gave it a disgusted second glance.

"Follow me," Kieran said in a whisper and tugged my sleeve, guiding me upstairs. He then proceeded to open the door of one of the rooms, motioning for me to walk inside. "I'll come for you in a moment," he said, then closed the door. I held my ear against it until I could no longer hear his footsteps. Then I moved towards one of the two beds in the room and sat down. Running my hands over my legs continuously I looked around, though not really taking in my surroundings.

Time ticked by and I soon became bored fumbling with a loose string in my red sweater. I paced the room, staring at my feet as I did. Suddenly, the door was opened, but it was not Kieran who entered. The stranger was wearing an extremely shabby set of wizard's robes that had been darned in several places, and he looked ill and utterly exhausted. Though seemingly quite young, his light brown hair was flecked with grey, and his eyes held an old pain I came to pity and nothing but kindness.

"Uh... Good day?" I greeted with a faint smile and a small wave of the hand.

"Please come with me," said the man with a weak, though friendly smile.

I shrugged and followed him back down the staircase to the ground floor, slightly wondering why he was nearly tiptoeing but then deciding to do the same. He took me to the far end of the entrance hall where he knocked on a door. When finally receiving a response to enter he opened the door, and I felt close to fainting when he showed me inside. It seemed I had walked in on a meeting, men and women seated around a large table in the centre of the room.

"Take a seat, Remus," sounded a firm male-voice. Shock filled my eyes when I spotted the owner of this voice - no other than Albus Dumbledore. Though, when the Headmaster turned towards me, my gaze averted his and I nervously tapped the fingers of my left hand against my thigh.

My eyes quickly scanned the room and I spotted a few people I vaguely recognised from my time at the Ministry, no personal acquaintance. Kieran was sitting near Professor Dumbledore and the Remus fellow had taken a seat opposite him. But what made my heart pump faster - more so than out of nervousness - was when my eyes fell upon Snape... It did not make sense.

I jumped when Professor Dumbledore spoke, "Hello, Iris."

I tried to mutter a 'hello', but no words would form at all. I continued nervously tapping my leg and looked at my feet, feeling very uneasy under the many stares.

"You do not need to be frightened, Iris, we mean you no harm," said the Professor.

"So I keep getting told," I muttered, glancing up at him briefly.

"It is understandable you are in doubt who to trust. The Order of the Phoenix is secret from the Ministry. You won't be sent to Azkaban Prison. If you want to, you can be safe in our protection. You _can_ be safe..."

I looked down, trying hard and succeeding in not letting any tears appear. "I don't want to run anymore. I'm so... tired... of running..." I looked the Professor in the eye, making all sincerity I had evident, "I've run all my life. I don't want to waste the rest on keep running for my freedom. The life I've had hasn't been much, but I've had no opportunity to make something of it... I know magic is not great within me... But I have no other choice than to believe I can actually be a person; a real person with a meaning."

Dumbledore glanced at some of the others; then looked at me over his half-moon glasses. "Thank you, Iris. If you would please step outside..."

I nodded slightly, hesitantly, then turned and exited the room, closing the door after me.


	19. The Halcyon Days 19

**Disclaimer:** See the first chapter.

**Background:** See the first chapter.

**Summary:** In the dark times when the Dark Lord returned to power, he searched for new followers and wished to regain what had been lost. But did all of his Death Eaters join him of free will? Iris Halither looks back and tells her tale, and discovers a horrible truth about herself...

**Note:** The story is divided into chapters, the chapters shaped into parts. One part is seven chapters, no matter the lengths of those. Some chapters are short, some are long. That's how they were written.

**-**

**The Tale of a Death Eater  
Part III****: The Halcyon Days  
Chapter 19**

**-**

I was jittery with anxiety, and it felt like I had paced the entrance hall for centuries, a trail of my snow-wet boots visible in the threadbare carpet. I had no idea what they were saying in that room. Would they turn me away? What would happen if they did? Out of grown habit I scratched my arm through the sweater, exactly where my scarred Mark was. It was a constant reminder of my demons. A reminder that I was wanted _dead_. And if they would not accept me in the Order... would I have yet more enemies?

The door was opened and I stopped in my track and turned around. Members of the Order exited the room. Some walked down a stair to a lower level, some walked past me and left the house through the front door, silently. What did this mean?

"Iris?" said a familiar voice, and I looked towards the door again to see Kieran. "You can come in now," he said and walked back inside. I followed him a moment after and was startled when the door magically closed behind me. I swallowed when seeing the Professor standing a few feet from me, his hands folded behind his back. He was looking at me with a small smile.

Then he said, "Welcome to the Order of the Phoenix, Iris Halither..."

-

I walked beside Kieran as he led me down the stair to what he told me to be the kitchen. He looked at me every now and then, a smile crossing his features, though not showing on his lips.

"What?" I asked when getting eye contact.

"I told you, you'd be fine," he said and finally smiled.

"We'll see, I suppose. I've learned never to expect too much too soon," I said. I froze when we came to the end of the stair. The basement floor was indeed a kitchen with rough-hewn walls and a large fireplace. There was a dresser where utensils and plates were probably kept, and a small pantry was connected to the kitchen. A bunch of Order members sat around a large table with lots of chairs, eating some very nice-smelling soup.

Kieran laid an arm round my shoulders and guided me towards the table, stopping by the end of it. "How about an introduction?" he said and looked around the table. "Iris, this is Dedalus Diggle," he motioned towards a man to the left wearing a set of violet robes, "and beside him is Elphias Doge." Both men nodded to me with friendly smiles, and I sent a shy smile in return. "To Elphias' left we have Hestia Jones, and beside her is Kingsley Shacklebolt." Jones was a pink-cheeked, black-haired witch who looked like a woman you could probably see behind the counter of a sweet-shop. Shacklebolt was a tall, bald black wizard who greeted in a deep, slow voice, his gold earring glinting. "Opposite Jones is Remus Lupin, whom you've already met, I believe, and to his right is the infamous Alastor 'Mad-Eye' Moody," Kieran finished, gesturing towards them.

I felt a bit nervous with Moody, his rough features giving him a rather intimidating look. Every inch of his skin seemed to be scarred, his mouth looked like a diagonal gash, and a large chunk of his nose was missing. But it was Moody's eyes that made him so frightening. One of them was small, dark and beady. The other was large, round as a coin, and a vivid, electric blue. This strange eye was fixed at me, while the other was looking into the soup as he ate. I had heard of Alastor Moody; who had not? His doings for the Ministry of Magic were spoken of with admiration. Though, now he was considered paranoid and perhaps mad, suiting his nickname.

"Now, let's get you something to eat, shall we? You hardly touched your breakfast!" Kieran said and pulled me out a chair beside Lupin.

"I'm not a very hungry person," I said, smiling slightly.

"I'm sure you want to try this soup," said Hestia Jones with a wide smile, "no one can say no to Molly Weasley's cooking."

"It was nice of her to bring some," Shacklebolt agreed.

"Weasley?" I said, recognising the name.

"The Weasleys are a pure-blood wizard-family," it sounded from Moody, "like yours."

"I _know_ who the Weasleys are. I started at Hogwarts the same year as Charlie Weasley," I said, annoyed that he spoke to me like I was some child. I didn't like looking at him either. It always felt like that magical eye of his would focus on me whenever I'd be nearby, and therefore I always tried to avoid his glance.

"You know Nymphadora Tonks, then?" Remus Lupin asked.

"Not in person, but yes. She was in my year, too," I said.

Kieran placed a bowl of soup in front of me and sat down beside me, fishing up some veggies from his own bowl. "Anyone going to Molly and Arthur's for Christmas, by the way?" he asked.

"I am," said Lupin with a smile. "Can't say no to a good Christmas meal."

"Would you be interested?" Kieran said and looked at me out of the corner of his eyes as he swallowed some more soup.

"Sure!" I said, overly excited to be asked. Ah yes, to meet new people and actually celebrate Christmas for once was more than I could hope for. I was certain it would be an event to remember.

-

Back at Kieran's place early the following morning we were in the kitchen eating breakfast. Something had been nagging me since Grimmauld Place, and after much mind-battling, I gathered enough nerve to ask.

"Kieran?"

"Hmm?"

"What is Lupin's story? He seemed... rather private when I tried talking to him in person last night?" I asked, remembering how closed the bloke had seemed, barely saying a word. I never thought to find a person as withholding as I was, you see.

He laid down his knife and fork and looked up at me. "He has reason to be reserved. Remus Lupin has been disliked by many in the past and present, and that has left him unhopeful with new people. Prejudice has taken a great toll on that man's life." At my confused look, he continued, "Lupin suffers lycanthropy."

"He's a werewolf?!" I burst out, pushing an image of Greyback out of my head.

"He was bitten as a child, yes. But it is something you should go quiet about."

I frowned and looked at my pale hands, knowing the horrid feeling of being unwanted all too well. Poor Lupin. A guy like him should not have to endure such a horrible thing. Though my encounter with him had been brief I had already come to like Lupin's character. I wished to learn more of him.

-

It was the day before Christmas, the 24th, and Kieran had decided to pack a small suitcase with necessary things for our stay at the Weasleys'. "Are we sleeping there?" I asked curiously and peered into his bedroom as he was packing some of his clothes.

He smiled at me and shut the case closed with a _click_. "Only for the night," he said and straightened up. "It is too dangerous to leave after nightfall."

I quirked an eyebrow, thinking it couldn't be much different from _arriving_ at dark. "And where will we be sleeping then?" I required, slowly raising my other eyebrow as well.

"Crammed up in a wardrobe; so I hope you like close physical contact... _Relax_, there's room enough. The Weasleys have a lot of kids," he eased with a widening grin.

"Very funny. Veeery funny."

"Now come on. We're Apparating," he said and walked closer to me. I groaned and let him circle his arm round my waist. My head had never seemed to grow on to Apparition, so I quickly closed my eyes when I felt the familiar sensation arise in my stomach.

When I opened my eyes I smiled at the sight of an adorable little house. Though, little it was not. The Burrow, as Kieran told me it was called, included a rather large, ramshackle house, a garage, a garden with a small lake, and yards surrounded by hedges. The house itself was at least four storeys tall, built so crazily that it must certainly be held up by magic.

"Make haste," said Kieran and pulled me towards a backdoor where several old kettles were stacked up. He knocked on the door three times.

"Who is it?" required the suspicious voice of a man.

"_I am Keen on Iris flowers_," said Kieran as if it was some sort of code. The door was opened, cautiously, to reveal a thin man, going bald, though the little hair on his head was as red as I remembered that of Charlie's. He was wearing long, green robes, which were dusty and travel-worn. "Hello, Mr. Weasley," Kieran greeted and shook hands with him, stepping inside.

"Evening. So, is this the Order's latest addition?" said Mr. Weasley who looked to me with a wide smile on his face.

"Nice to meet you, sir," I said and shook hands with him as well.

"Welcome to our ranks," he said excitedly.

"Thank you," I said, amused. It was incredible how fast I came to like all of them. You couldn't help but feel so welcome in their presence, like they actually cared for one's company. Certainly people I would have liked to have met earlier in life when the length of it would seem by far too long and gloomy.

"Kieran!" exclaimed a woman who I guessed to be Mrs. Weasley. It was no wonder why Charlie had so fiery hair as it would seem he inherited it from both parents. My smile widened when the short, plump and kind-faced woman embraced Kieran instead of shaking his outstretched hand, making the young man's cheeks redden slightly. "And this must be the dear Iris? Heard so much about you, but I would much like to hear more," said Mrs. Weasley with a beaming smile.

"You've heard about me?" I cast a sideways glance at Kieran who wore a slightly uncomfortable look, his cheeks only reddening more. I would have some questions to ask later, as to how many people my little _spy_ had told of me. But for now I only wanted to enjoy myself.

I slowly came to realise that there were other people as well, in the living room. Remus Lupin I recognised, and Mr. Weasley introduced me to the others. One of them was Harry Potter...

-

The dinner was, as expected, incredibly delicious. I smiled contently and looked into the fireplace as I sat in an armchair in the living room. It had got to be the best Christmas in my life so far, for the previous ones had been rather uneventful and lonely. Celestina Warbeck's voice rang from the wooden wireless, and I had to hold in a grunt when seeing Fleur Delacour's pained expression. It appeared that Delacour was the fiancée of Bill Weasley, the oldest Weasley brother.

I listened to bits of the conversations around me and got caught in a chat between Harry Potter and Mr. Weasley. I didn't pay much attention to what they were talking about. It was only when Lupin decided to join the discussion my ears sharpened slightly:

"Has it occurred to you, Harry," said Mr. Weasley, "that Snape was simply pretending--"

"Pretending to offer help, so that he could find out what Malfoy's up to? Yeah, I thought you'd say that. But how do we know?"

"It isn't our business to know," said Lupin. "It's Dumbledore's business. Dumbledore trusts Severus, and that ought to be good enough for all of us."

"But," said Potter, "just say - just say Dumbledore's wrong about Snape--"

"People have said it, many times. It comes down to whether or not you trust Dumbledore's judgement. I do; therefore, I trust Severus."

"But Dumbledore can make mistakes. He says it himself. And you--" The boy paused, and I thought about his words. Dumbledore could make mistakes; and I was certain he was wrong about Snape. Snape seemed so right in the environment of the Death Eaters. He _was_ one of them. But was it an act? Was he really just spying on them on Dumbledore's orders? Time would only show.

I caught up on the talk too late, and it seemed they would say no more. Celestina's song ended and applause erupted from the wireless, Mrs. Weasley joining in. "Ees eet over?" it sounded from Delacour. "Thank goodness, what an 'orrible--"

"Shall we have a nightcap, then?" Mr. Weasley interrupted, obviously to avoid a snap from his wife, and I giggled inwardly at his desperate attempt. "Who wants eggnog?"

"What have you been up to lately?" Potter asked, and I stretched to take a quick glance at him and Lupin, hoping to be able to snatch something interesting.

"Oh, I've been underground," said Lupin. "Almost literally. That's why I haven't been able to write, Harry; sending letters to you would have been something of a give-away."

"What do you mean?"

"I've been living among my fellows, my equals," said Lupin. "Werewolves," he added, at Potter's look of incomprehension. "Nearly all of them are on Voldemort's side. Dumbledore wanted a spy and here I was... ready-made." The bitterness in his tone may have been unintended, for he added with a warm smile, "I am not complaining; it is necessary work and who can do it better than I?" That's something I liked very much in Lupin. He was very modest and never moved beyond it unless he felt it was appropriate, like in this case. "However," Lupin continued, "it has been difficult gaining their trust. I bear the unmistakable signs of having tried to live among wizards, you see, whereas they have shunned normal society and live on the margins, stealing - and sometimes killing - to eat."

"How come they like Voldemort?" asked Potter.

"They think that, under his rule, they will have a better life. And it is hard to argue with Greyback out there..." My stomach turned at the mention of the wolf's name.

"Who's Greyback?"

"You haven't heard of him?" Lupin's hands closed convulsively in his lap. "Fenrir Greyback is, perhaps, the most savage werewolf alive today. He regards it as his mission in life to bite and contaminate as many people as possible; he wants to create enough werewolves to overcome the wizards. Voldemort has promised him prey in return for his services. Greyback specialises in children... bite them young, he says, and raise them away from their parents, raise them to hate normal wizards. Voldemort has threatened to unleash him upon people's sons and daughters; it is a threat that usually produces good results." Lupin paused and then said, "It was Greyback who bit me."

-

**Author's note:** Some of this was taken out of HBP, and so of course all that is not in my own words belongs to J.K. Rowling. That said, I'm not Rowling. But everything else is still mine, heheh.


	20. The Halcyon Days 20

**Disclaimer:** See the first chapter.

**Background:** See the first chapter.

**Summary:** In the dark times when the Dark Lord returned to power, he searched for new followers and wished to regain what had been lost. But did all of his Death Eaters join him of free will? Iris Halither looks back and tells her tale, and discovers a horrible truth about herself...

**Note:** The story is divided into chapters, the chapters shaped into parts. One part is seven chapters, no matter the lengths of those. Some chapters are short, some are long. That's how they were written.

**-**

**The Tale of a Death Eat****er  
Part III: The Halcyon Days  
Chapter 20**

**-**

"What?" said Potter with clear astonishment. "When-- when you were a kid, you mean?"

"Yes. My father had offended him. I did not know, for a very long time, the identity of the werewolf who had attacked me; I even felt pity for him, thinking that he had had no control, knowing by then how it felt to transform. But Greyback is not like that. At the full moon he positions himself close to victims, ensuring that he is near enough to strike. He plans it all. And this is the man Voldemort is using to marshal the werewolves. I cannot pretend that my particular brand of reasoned argument is making much headway against Greyback's insistence that we werewolves deserve blood, that we ought to revenge ourselves on normal people."

The horror overwhelmed me. Was this really what Greyback was doing? Turning children to _monsters_? Attacking innocent people because of his believes that they were, what, restless souls only satisfied by the blood of those not tainted? The hate I felt for him then cannot be said with words... simply indescribable.

"But you are normal!" said Potter fiercely. "You've just got a-- a problem--"

Lupin burst out laughing. "Sometimes you remind me a lot of James. He called it my 'furry little problem' in company. Many people were under the impression that I owned a badly behaved rabbit." He accepted a glass of eggnog from Mr. Weasley with a word of thanks, and I tuned out of their conversation completely.

When Delacour started to imitate Celestina Warbeck everybody seemed to catch the look on Mrs. Weasley's face and found it was time to go bed. I agreed to sleep in the same room as Kieran as, although the house had many rooms, there was no reason to be a bother. The room appeared to be Percy Weasley's, one of the eldest of the children. Kieran had offered me the bed, but I had refused and had taken the camp bed instead... whatever sort of creature a _camp_ is...

"So what do you think?" asked Kieran when the light was off.

"They're... nice," I said, smiling in the dark. I couldn't make out his expression, but I could faintly see his form covered by blankets. "It's a nice experience, in all. It's just... nice..."

He chuckled and I could hear him turn on his side. "Goodnight, Iris."

"Goodnight..."

-

When we went to the kitchen Christmas morning I was greeted by a surprise. Mrs. Weasley came over to us and gave both of us a somewhat clumsily brown-paper wrapped parcel. She merely smiled at my wondrous face and told us both to unwrap. _Sweaters_. She had given Kieran a dark-brown one with a white pattern. Mine was blue and with the motive of a raven.

"Matches your eyes and hair, dear," she said and patted my arm.

"I-- thanks!" I said and pulled it on, shocked being the mild thing to say.

She smiled again and continued with her cooking.

It appeared that everybody was wearing new sweaters when we all sat down for Christmas lunch, everyone except Fleur Delacour and Mrs. Weasley herself, who was sporting a brand new midnight-blue witch's hat glittering with what looked like tiny starlike diamonds, and a spectacular golden necklace.

"Fred and George gave them to me! Aren't they beautiful?"

"Well, we find we appreciate you more and more, Mum, now we're washing our own socks," said George Weasley, waving an airy hand. "Parsnips, Remus?"

I glared at Kieran as he seemed to stare at me while I ate. I still didn't eat very much; just couldn't stomach it. Being accustomed to eating rarely had fooled my body to think I didn't need food and nourishment, no matter how hungry I would be.

"Harry, you've got a maggot in your hair," said Ginny Weasley cheerfully, leaning across the table to pick it out.

"'Ow 'orrible," said Delacour with an affected little shudder.

"Yes, isn't it?" said Ron Weasley. "Gravy, Fleur?" In his eagerness to help her, he knocked the gravy boat flying; the oldest brother Bill waved his wand and the gravy soared up in the air and returned meekly to the boat.

"You are as bad as sat Tonks," quipped Delacour, when she had finished kissing Bill. "She is always knocking--"

"I invited _dear_ Tonks to come along today," said Mrs. Weasley, setting down the carrots with unnecessary force and glaring at Delacour. "But she wouldn't come. Have you spoken to her lately, Remus?"

"No, I haven't been in contact with anybody very much," said Lupin. "But Tonks has got her own family to go to, hasn't she?"

"Hmmm," said Mrs. Weasley. "Maybe. I got the impression she was planning to spend Christmas alone, actually." She looked at him irritably, like it was his entire fault she was getting Fleur Delacour for a daughter-in-law instead of someone like Tonks. I wondered slightly why Mrs. Weasley would make such a trouble about Tonks, my old classmate. Would she rather have seen _her_ with Bill? Or Charlie, possibly...?

"Arthur!" said Mrs. Weasley so suddenly I hit my knee on one of the table's legs out of surprise. She had risen from her chair; her hand was pressed over her heart and she was staring out of the kitchen window. "Arthur, it's Percy!"

"_What_?" Mr. Weasley looked around. Everybody looked quickly at the window; Ginny Weasley stood up for a better view. A man with the fiery red of Weasley hair was striding across the snowy yard, his horn-brimmed glasses glinting in the sunlight. But he was damn well not alone...

"Arthur, he's-- he's with the Minister!"

There came the man I had seen in the Ministry on the rare occasion, limping slightly, his mane of greying hair and his black cloak flecked with snow. Before anybody could say anything the backdoor was open, and who I guessed to be Percy Weasley stepped inside. I quickly lowered my head and looked down at the table, absolutely terrified. One word was all I had in my mind; _Azkaban_.

The silence was intense, until Percy said rather stiffly, "Merry Christmas, Mother."

"Oh, _Percy_!" said Mrs. Weasley, and she threw herself into his arms.

From under my eyebrows I observed as Minister Rufus Scrimgeour paused in the doorway, leaning on his walking stick, all the while my heart was pumping so loudly I was afraid everybody could hear. "You must forgive this intrusion," he said. "Percy and I were in the vicinity - working, you know - and he couldn't resist dropping in and seeing you all."

The young Weasley, though, stood poker-straight and awkward-looking, and stared over everybody else's heads, _thankfully_. Mr. Weasley and the twins were all observing him as well, stone-faced.

"Please, come in, sit down, Minister!" fluttered Mrs. Weasley, straightening her hat. I nearly cursed loudly at the woman, being the situation I was in, but restrained myself when the Minister interrupted her as she continued, "Have a little purky or some tooding... I mean--"

"No, no, my dear Molly. I don't want to intrude, wouldn't be here at all if Percy hadn't wanted to see you all so badly..."

"Oh, Perce!" said Mrs. Weasley tearfully, reaching up to kiss him. I just kept mentally begging for them to leave.

"...We've only looked in for a few minutes, so I'll have a stroll around the yard while you catch up with Percy. No, no, I assure you I don't want to butt in! Well, if anybody cared to show me your charming garden... ah, that young man's finished, why doesn't he take a stroll with me?"

Everybody looked from Scrimgeour to Potter. Nobody seemed to find it convincing that he didn't know the name of Harry Potter, or find it natural that he should be chosen to accompany the Minister as Fred and Ginny Weasley, even Fleur Delacour, also had clean plates.

"Yeah, all right," said Potter. "It's fine," he said quietly as he passed Lupin, who had half-risen from his chair. "Fine," he added, as Mr. Weasley opened his mouth to speak.

"Wonderful!" said Scrimgeour and let him walk outside. "We'll just take a turn around the garden and then Percy and I'll be off. Carry on, everyone!"

-

When Potter returned to the house, the Minister and Percy Weasley finally left, Scrimgeour looking quite annoyed to a withheld fuming point. I went outside for a walk when Mr. Weasley, Fred, George, Bill and Delacour went to work. Kieran had seemed hesitant about letting me outside, but Mrs. Weasley assured him no one would be lurking around the Borrow around Christmas, let alone in the middle of the day.

The snow creaked below my feet, giving no impression of leaving the grass-covered yard anytime soon. I strode to the small lake and looked at my blurred reflection in the ice, breathing in the frosty air, crisp with winter. It _felt_ like Christmas. I had never had that feeling before. After I left Hogwarts the only sense I had of the holiday would be the decorations on the streets of London and inside the Ministry. There was no feeling in it. No family to go to, no friends to see. It was rather lonely... But then again, I grew up lonely.

"You must be freezing." I jumped and turned, relieved to find Lupin standing a few feet away from me, hands deep in his pockets as he also looked at the surroundings. "I'm sorry, didn't mean to startle you," he said and looked at me, still facing the lake.

"It's all right," I said and rubbed my hands, realising that I _was_ a bit cold.

"Here." He pulled off his gloves and gave them to me.

"What about you?"

He shrugged and put his hands back in his pockets.

I watched him for a while as he just stood there, looking into the distance, his mind a thousand miles away. Lupin was an exceptional kind of man. He always seemed so worried, sad, but he never talked about his feelings. Yes, through-and-through Lupin was a very nice man, but he had a failing. And his failing was that he did like to be liked and that's where he slipped up because he had been disliked so often that he was always so pleased to have friends, so he cut them and awful lot of slack... "I've seen you before," I suddenly remembered, not aware that I said it out loud. Some of his features were familiar... his smile...

Curious eyes found mine and he turned towards me. "Really?" he said, lifting his head slightly.

"In pictures, at Kieran's place... Wedding photos?"

His expression saddened and his gaze lowered to the ground a brief moment. "James and Lily's wedding," he said, "yes."

"You knew them well?" I asked in a small voice, feeling as though I should not have brought up the matter.

"James Potter and Lily Evans were some of my dearest friends at Hogwarts and later in life. It was always me, James, Sirius and..." He licked his lips shortly, "Peter..."

_Peter_... "Not... Surely not Peter Pettigrew!" I said with a dismissive laugh. His expression caught one of recognition and I frowned.

"You've met him," he stated, rather coldly.

"I have," I nodded gravely. "So, Remus Lupin, James Potter and Peter Pettigrew... and..."

"Sirius Black," said Lupin with a smile at the corner of his mouth.

"And Sirius Bla--" I stopped and lifted my eyebrows. "Sirius Black? So you knew the father of the most famous boy alive, one of the Dark Lord's most despicable servants and the first man ever to escape Azkaban Prison?" He could hear the disbelief in my tone.

"Life leads to strange paths," he said. "Sometimes the only choice we have is to follow the dark ones..."

I looked down with a knowing smile. He was right.

-

**Author's note:** More quotes from HBP here. They don't belong to me either.


	21. The Halcyon Days 21

**Disclaimer:** See the first chapter.

**Background:** See the first chapter.

**Summary:** In the dark times when the Dark Lord returned to power, he searched for new followers and wished to regain what had been lost. But did all of his Death Eaters join him of free will? Iris Halither looks back and tells her tale, and discovers a horrible truth about herself...

**Note:** The story is divided into chapters, the chapters shaped into parts. One part is seven chapters, no matter the lengths of those. Some chapters are short, some are long. That's how they were written.

**-**

**The Tale of a Death Eat****er  
Part III: The Halcyon Days  
Chapter 21**

**-**

Some time after leaving the Burrow I was 'moved' from Kieran's house to Grimmauld Place, being told it would be safer as I was searched for by both the Ministry and the Dark Side. Though, moping around the Headquarters was never fun. Don't mistake me, I _was_ allowed to go to the meetings. But I rarely felt the need. I wanted to know as little of the Dark Lord's doings as possible. Perhaps, in my mind, I tried to pretend the world was at peace.

Some days were longer than others, the visits of members of the Order more frequent in the weeks after Christmas. I often went exploring in the old house, though careful not to disturb anything. At a time I came across a room where I spotted a huge tapestry on one of the walls. The tapestry looked immensely old; it was faded and looked as though Doxys had gnawed it in places. Nevertheless, the golden thread with which it was embroidered still glinted brightly enough to show a sprawling family tree dating far back to the Middle Ages. The words _Toujours Pur_ dawned a crest above large words at the very top of the tapestry which read:

_The Noble and Most An__cient House of Black_

The most Blacks seemed to have married into other pure-blood families. Names such as Prewett, Crouch, Crabbe and even Potter were to be found in the tree. A small smirk showed on my lips at the sight of Narcissa Black's name combined with Lucius Malfoy's, a thin line leading down to their son Draco. Narcissa's name was also found to be connected with two other names. Or, a name and a hole in the tapestry. The readable of the two read _Bellatrix_ and was combined with a _Rodolphus Lestrange_. I certainly knew who Rodolphus Lestrange was and-- Bellatrix Lestrange? _Bella_? But of course...

_"...Well, if it isn't my de__ar _brother-in-law_..."_

So the shrilly woman I had seen in Azkaban was the sister of Lucius Malfoy's wife? And Draco's aunt? What a disturbing thought...

The tree's branches seemed to stretch for aeons, though exactly how many centuries I couldn't tell. There was a lot of history. It made me realise I hardly knew anything about my own roots. My mind was a question as to where I had origin. Surely the Halithers were to be found in the past?

I sighed and climbed the stairs, settling in my room. There wasn't much for me to do. Days seemed to be no different from nights, and time slipped into a cycle of repetitions. I pulled off my dark-green pullover and walked to the dresser. Mrs. Weasley had been so kind to knit me more sweaters when word came to her I barely had clothes.

A sound startled me and I twirled around, wide-eyed. "How did you get in here?" I thought out loud as I spotted a bird sitting on the wooden desk by one of the windows. Looking up I found the window open. I grabbed my discarded sweater from the floor and cautiously moved closer to it. Croaking, it hopped to the far end of the table as I tried to shoo it outside. The fact it seemed so anxious to just get farther away instead of just flying off made me wonder; was it hurt?

"Now there... I'm not going to harm you. So, if you could be as nice as to refrain from harming _me_, I'll just have a little look at you..." I closed the window and moved to the other side of the table, throwing the sweater over animal. I carefully placed my hands around its quite large form and - with my fingers safely covered by the fabric - released its head so I was certain it could breathe. It buried its beak in the shirt, trying to make me let go.

"Clever little raven, are you?" I cooed, getting a closer look at its glossy and slightly iridescent black feathers. Ravens get quite large, the largest species of songbird I reckon, but this one wasn't all that big, for it seemed starved. Cradling it with my left arm I walked out of my room, looking around time to time as I went to the kitchen on the bottom floor. "_Shush_!" I hissed at it as it kept croaking. Apparently quite loud creatures...

Reaching the kitchen, I walked to the pantry. "What to give you?" I groaned, suddenly realising I had no idea what ravens eat. I grabbed a loaf of bread, coming to the conclusion that all birds must be somewhat alike. Sitting down by the table I ripped the loaf and carefully held the bread closer to the raven's bill.

"What are you doing?" I looked up to see Lupin standing by the stair.

"A bird got into my room. I think it might've hit my window and broken something. It doesn't fly," I said, looking back to the animal in my arms.

He walked to my side, releasing a small sigh as he pulled out a small bottle from within his robes. "Here," he said, "should mend any broken bones just fine."

I smiled as thanks and grabbed the bird around the neck, not too harshly, tipping the fluid contents of the bottle down its throat. It swallowed most of it, and I thought it to be enough - it wasn't a very large creature, after all. Looking back at Lupin, I found he had gotten an old birdcage from the pantry. "That's excellent!" I said, eyes widening. "Thanks!"

"No problem," he smiled and exited the kitchen.

Without hurting the raven, I let it inside the cage. "Nice man, that Remus Lupin, eh?" I conversed and gazed into black eyes. Then, I frowned. "I'm talking to a bird..."

-

A fleeting gasp and a brow glazed with cold sweat was a way which I would wake many nights. Following, I would remember the present and relax into the comforts of sheets and blankets. And one who comforted me more than safe surroundings was my newfound friend. The raven had gotten better after a few days, the power of potions never ceasing to amaze me. I had tried letting it out the window again, but it seemed to stay behind, even when the window would be open for hours.

Dragging sleep out of bed, I found my footing with some difficulty and travelled towards the lavatory a bit down the hallway. Immediately turning on the enchanted cold water, I leaned into the sink and lowered my face to cupped hands filled with the refreshing liquid. Limbs heavy with fatigue I slumped against the tiled wall. Why did rest seem impossible? Looking into the mirror I only looked slightly better than weeks ago, skin as sickly pale as ever. Not quite the picture-perfect witch I could wish to be.

Locking the door, I undressed and stepped into the shower, wincing as I turned the water to burning hot. I sat down in the bath, arms dangling over the side as I let the scalding water rush down my back, forehead resting on the cold edge of the tub. If I was not confronted with challenge of some sort any time soon I would go mad with boredom. But what could I possibly do? I couldn't go anywhere.

Hearing motion downstairs I frowned. I got out of the shower and dried off, wincing slightly at my sore skin. I dressed quickly and moved down the stairs, looking over the railing slightly. Members of the Order had arrived, probably to attend a meeting. Having nothing better to do I decided to do the same.

-

"Are you out of your _mind_?"

Participating in a meeting with the rest of the Order proved to be quite interesting, that day at least. The arguments flew back and forth, heated comments attacking each proposition.

"I was merely stating that Harry is well protected as it is, Molly. The lad is not completely helpless, either! He's done well by himself countless of times already, hasn't he?" growled Mad-Eye Moody. One hand clenched on top of the scrubbed wooden table, he wore an expression of pure irritation. Mrs. Weasley sent him a long, narrowed look, then gave in and leaned back in her chair. "Nevertheless," continued the ex-Auror, returning to the previous subject as he said to Dumbledore, "I'm not too fond of hearing him havin' trouble with Apparition, hmm?"

The Headmaster gave him a little smile. "They've only just had their first lesson, Alastor. Not everybody is excellent with all forms of magic, let alone the first time. Apparition is one of the more complicated arts, after all." I could have sworn he looked at me as he said that. "Now," said Dumbledore and heaved a deep sigh, one hand rubbing tired eyes, "the werewolves?" All turned towards Remus Lupin. The latter smiled grimly and shook his head.

"No progress. Greyback's mind is still unchanged about Lord Voldemort, and so are the most of the other wolves. He doesn't seem to be the least persuasive. I suppose it is his crave for blood that speaks louder than my words." He closed his eyes a moment. "In other words, he still hates wizards as much as ever."

"I know Fenrir Greyback," I suddenly spoke up. I flinched as all heads turned to me.

Pale blue eyes glinted. "Wish to share with us, Iris?" suggested Dumbledore.

After gulping a couple of times, I nodded. "I know Greyback. Or, I did, when I was... with them. He's taken--" I grimaced, "--a certain interest in me. But I met him not so long ago, in Edinburgh. He was the one who killed the innkeeper who took me in after I..." I paused. There was no reason to tell them about Lucius Malfoy. The man saved my life. I would not betray _his_ by telling them he too had escaped Azkaban. "Greyback promised me he would not tell the Dark Lord where I was. I believed him. But it would not have mattered; I left with Kieran, after all."

I looked around at the many faces of the members. Aurors, a bunch of them. How I admired they would agree not to give me up to the Ministry. I wished some of them had been the ones to take me to Azkaban. Perhaps things would have been different...

Taking some deep breaths, eyes fixed on the table, I finally looked up at Dumbledore.

"I think I can help."


	22. Moonlight Lunacy 22

**Disclaimer:** See the first chapter.

**Background:** See the first chapter.

**Summary:** In the dark times when the Dark Lord returned to power, he searched for new followers and wished to regain what had been lost. But did all of his Death Eaters join him of free will? Iris Halither looks back and tells her tale, and discovers a horrible truth about herself...

**Note:** The story is divided into chapters, the chapters shaped into parts. One part is seven chapters, no matter the lengths of those. Some chapters are short, some are long. That's how they were written.

**-**

**The Tale of a Death Eater  
Part IV:**** Moonlight Lunacy  
Chapter 22**

**-**

My statement created an intense silence in the room. I looked to Lupin, finding his face furrowed with conflict. Dumbledore had closed his eyes in a brief moment of thought, and for once I realised just how _tired_ the Headmaster seemed. "Your offer is very grave, Miss Halither," he said, turning to my last name.

My breathing calmed somewhat; he had yet to reject my suggestion. "I know. But I'm willing to do it! Greyback would not harm me, I'm sure of it. If he wanted to, he would've done it in Edinburgh. I believe I would prove a slight advantage towards him." Looking around the room, I added, "It's worth the try."

"The try could be what kills yeh," grumbled Mad-Eye.

"That's not much in gamble," I muttered darkly, staring right into the intense blue of his magical eye. "There have been plenty of occasions where I should most likely have died. Curiously enough, I'm still alive. Let me do it..."

-

"What I get myself into sometimes," I whispered, my gaze lifted to the crescent moon. I groaned softly and let a hand pass my brow as I was hesitantly nearing a group of rocky caves half-underground. There was no evidence to be found of the wolves' presence in the depths of the forest but the gruff-voiced laughter heard even far-off if one only listened carefully. I had searched thoroughly, even taken care to mark the trees on my path with a piece of chalk, to make sure I wasn't going in circles... too much. It was still not clear in my head what I would actually do once I found them. Or what _they_ might do. I could only hope Greyback was present, and that he would reason with them.

The laughter bouncing off the rocky walls of the caves was rather unpleasant. Something told me I'd rather not know what was so amusing. Walking on light feet I entered a narrow opening, trying to keep my breath even and quiet for the sake of having the upper hand of the situation. As I heard small crunching sounds, I looked down and cursed, seeing the ground covered in dead leaves. I could hear voices now, speaking on the verge of shouting. It was pitch-dark and I stumbled clumsily at times.

The voices were coming closer still, a dim light appearing ahead. The flickering of flames, I reckoned, for the shadows around me were now in movement. I inhaled sharply, my foot slipping out before me and I drew back quickly. I had reached a gap in the rocky surface, and I frowned and wondered how on earth I would get past.

It was then the cracking of fire caught in my ear, and I turned to my right. A small opening was to be found amongst the rocks and I walked closer, leaning against the wall to sneak a glance through the opening.

I was shocked to see roughly-built wooden tables in the 'room' on the other side, made from wood found in the forest. Chairs were lined up along them, or stumps of trees, rather. From my position I couldn't spot any of the wolves, but I was able to see a bit of smoke finding its way towards the roof of the cave, most obviously coming from the fire I could hear. Too late I realised that the fire was _all_ I could hear. They were silent...

Fingers curled around my left shoulder and I turned quickly, eyes widening at the sight of a man. He was at least to be a head taller than me, his longish black hair smoothed back and shining with greasiness. Muddy green eyes peering down at me, he mocked me with a smarmy smile.

"Well, hello there."

As he moved, I pointed my wand right between his eyes. If he was to attack me I could hardly protect myself with it... but he didn't know that. "I wish to see Fenrir Greyback," I demanded, surprising myself with how calm I sounded.

His smile widened.

-

More than a dozen of them were seated by the tables. Some were sitting with their legs half-resting on top of the table, some actually sitting _on_ the table. I knew there were more than those because I could see shapes in the shadows, and others might be elsewhere, in the forest.

There was food on the tables, several kinds of meat (most of it looking quite raw) and, however unexpectedly, fruit as well. Dirty candlesticks covered in wax were scattered on the tables, illuminating those farthest from the large fire in the opposite end of the room. Looking up I could see a large hole in the rocky ceiling, allowing one to see the stars and the moon, which was now hiding amongst the few clouds there were.

Heads turned as the man led me further inside, and I tried to ignore the lopsided grins and mischievous eyes that glided over my form. They must have quickly realised I was indeed female, in spite of the fact I was wearing a thick cloak with the hood drawn over my head. Perhaps they sense these things...

As the werewolf led me closer towards the fire, a form came into vision. He was sitting there, with his back facing us. "Alpha," the man addressed, and Greyback's head turned slightly, still looking into the flames.

"I think I made it quite clear, _Cicero_, that I was not to be disturbed," rasped Greyback.

"Oh, I think this one might interest you," smirked Cicero, his yellowed teeth grinding into a snarl of a smile. He turned towards me and tugged at my arm, forcefully pulling me in front of him. "Says she knows you..."

Had he truly been in the form of a wolf, Greyback's ears would have twitched at the rather unusual use of the hissed 'she'. He slowly turned on the wooden log on which he was seated, his lips parting in a wide grin as he laid his eyes upon me. They then shifted towards the man behind me, and he said, "Leave us." As Greyback rose to his feet, my attention came upon his robes. His large form was wrapped in a large, clumsily-sewn-together fur coat. The grey-and-white fur resembled that of a wolf, and I wondered if he had slain actual wolves for the trophy... or rivalling men...

"You're cold," he remarked, and I had no time to react before he was behind me, his fur draped over my shoulders. I immediately turned, having no desire to have my back to the predator. "So, why the _delightfully_ unexpected visit? I'm quite surprised as to how you managed to find your way here... and alive?"

I was silent a moment, pondering his words. "I have a couple of things to bargain with you, on my own accord. I suppose you can say there's not much of the shying girl left in me anymore," I stated uneasily.

His bark of laughter struck against the walls. "Oh, I think there's plenty left of that girl." He proved his point when I flinched as he reached towards me to just lightly touch my cheek, the movement so brief I barely felt his fingers. I let out a withheld breath as he turned away from me to move some logs in the fire. "You must be hungry... What would you like?"

I blinked several times, internally questioning his question. "I don't think--"

"No, Iris. I _demand_ you eat. You are in my home, after all." The werewolves snickered, causing Greyback to smirk with gloat as he too chuckled.

-

Despite the warmth of the fire, the night came hard. The wind crept in from the smallest of cracks, yet the hole in the roof of the cave proved not to be a problem, except if it would rain. They used animal furs and skins as beds - perfect against the stone-floor - and lying on a bearskin, I had buried myself inside my cloak, the material feeling unusually cold and clammy. Perhaps the moist of the forest had settled in the fabric, causing the fire to dampen the slight wetness and create a cooling sensation which had already seeped to my bones.

My cloak and the peculiar sound of snoring kept me from falling asleep. I was quite unaccustomed to the common male sound, and the symphony the werewolves made would have made Hogwarts wrongdoers proud. Being so, I hoped the first night would be the hardest, and that it would be easier to find rest in those to come. In any case, I had a feeling I would never get much sleep.


	23. Moonlight Lunacy 23

**D****isclaimer:** See the first chapter.

**Background:** See the first chapter.

**Summary:** In the dark times when the Dark Lord returned to power, he searched for new followers and wished to regain what had been lost. But did all of his Death Eaters join him of free will? Iris Halither looks back and tells her tale, and discovers a horrible truth about herself...

**Note:** The story is divided into chapters, the chapters shaped into parts. One part is seven chapters, no matter the lengths of those. Some chapters are short, some are long. That's how they were written.

**-**

**The Tale of a Death Eater  
Part IV:**** Moonlight Lunacy  
Chapter 23**

**-**

_Drip_... _drip_... _drip_...

The strange sensation of droplets running down my cheeks stirred me from the world of dreams. Sleepily wiping them away, I turned my head to the side and tried to go back to sleep. The constant dripping would not allow me such luxury. Rapidly blinking, I tried to focus on the figures above me. The lines sharpened and the colours shifted into forms, revealing leering faces. Still not quite awake, I ran my fingers over my chin to investigate what was on my face. Lifting my hand into sight, I looked closer at the liquid. Deep red in colouring, its iron-like smell snuck into my nose... _Blood_...? Blood!

I shrieked and jumped up, frantically trying to wipe the icky stickiness off my face. Grinding my teeth, I glared at the men who were laughing at me. Turning to a sleeping spot near mine, I stared pointedly at Greyback, who had just woken up. He frowned at first, trying to comprehend what was wrong. When he realised, he chuckled. "Boys will be boys, Iris. They're just playing around a bit..."

"_Playing around_? They flicked blood at me!" I burst out.

He rose and stared his fellows down with a father's criticising eye. "Well, now. Apologise to the lady."

All male eyes shifted to me, and the youngsters grinned humourlessly. "We apologise for our inconsiderate joke," drawled one standing next to me. As they returned to what they were once doing, I stepped closer to Greyback.

"That wasn't... _human_ blood, was it?" I stuttered in a whisper.

The werewolf grunted, "Of course not. They're savages and brutes, but they wouldn't go that far without my consent. If I wanted you dipped in blood for a taste, I'd do it myself." He winked at me and walked towards the nearest table, patting the seat next to him. Disgusted in reaction to what he said, I hesitatingly sat down by his side.

"What are we feeling like?" Greyback asked and made a gesture down the table at the food. Having no appetite, the same as ever, I grabbed some fruit and gingerly nibbled it where it didn't have suspicious spots. The host scowled slightly at the choice, but didn't say anything to the matter. "We're raiding tonight," he suddenly announced and looked at his fellows who suddenly flocked round him like children.

My eyes widened.

"In town?" asked one with an excited gleam in his eye.

Greyback grumbled and chewed his lip thoughtfully, "Not yet. There's a farm up close to where we went last. Should provide what we need."

"And the kill?" questioned the man named Cicero.

The alpha inhaled slowly. He glimpsed at me, and for a moment I thought he would consider in my favour. I was wrong. "... No survivors." His men were overly pleased with that decision and raised their glasses in his honour.

They continued their loud chatting, and I leaned close to Greyback so no one else would hear, "You cannot be serious about this. You're going to _kill_ people?"

He did not face me as he answered, "My boys haven't had a hunt for weeks. They need their fun once in a while, and I'm not one to disappoint. I could use some entertainment of my own; you're not proving much fun." I tensed as he patted my thigh teasingly, though I could not feel it through the thickness of my robes.

"So you want to be _entertained_, do you? Well, you'll have to find someone easy, I'm not participating in any of your fun," I hissed.

His stone-faced features cracked and he chuckled merrily. "I am only poking fun with you, love. If anything, I'd want you to be willing for such an... _advancement_ in our relationship. But I enjoy your petty arguments. Charming, really."

-

By dusk they were ready. Covered in various animal furs, they all resembled beasts of the night as they snuck out of the caves. Greyback waited for them. Elegantly crouched on a large rock, eyes closed and nose turned to the sky, he was sniffing the air. I stood beside him, observantly, gathering as much of his strange demeanour as I could. As he opened his eyes, the moonlight glinting in the corners, he looked down at me. "Brace yourself," he growled under his breath.

Before I had time to react, he had slid down the rock and taken a firm grip of my wrist, dragging me along as he broke into a run. Briefly getting the chance to look over my shoulder, I saw the other men following pursuit. I hardly had to keep up with him as he was running so fast my feet barely had time to touch the ground, nearly flying above the rubble. The speed was exhilarating, and my breaths were coming quick as it was an effort to swallow the wind, which was beating hard against my face.

To say that I was out of breath when Greyback finally came to a halt is an understatement; I was puffing and panting heavily. He almost had to restrain me as my body jerked forwards in the sudden change of motion, while he stood at ease like a rock. When he let go of me, I bent down, steadying myself with my hands on my thighs as I heaved for air. Greyback didn't take notice and slowly walked ahead with his hand raised. The oddly quiet running of the werewolves stopped, and they were beside me. Straightening, I looked up.

Before us was a large farmhouse with barns, cowsheds and stables combined close to it. It looked awfully quiet at this time. There were no lights on inside, and the moon shone down at the farmyard with a ghostly pale glow.

I glanced at Greyback just as he made a quick hand movement towards the basement of the house. Four men bolted in the direction and easily got past the rotting wooden-doors of the entrance to the underground level. Soon after, they returned with the farmers in tow. I stared at them, the men, the women... No children at least, and at this Greyback seemed disappointed. "Kill them," he said carelessly, and as his followers slid knives over their throats and left them on the ground to bleed, he didn't even spare them a second glance, already bored with it all.

I watched the scene with horror, the stark red gushing onto the cobblestone. I gagged and had to turn away, my stomach clenching horribly, threatening to spill its contents. When I spotted Greyback, walking casually towards the now open front door, I ran to him and grasped his large arm desperately, "_How could you do that_?" He ignored me, shrugged me off, and entered the farmhouse, forcing me to follow him. "How could you just have them slaughtered like that?" I hissed at him.

"Sometimes it's simply necessary," he spoke easily, end of story, the end. It was then I remembered what I had heard Lupin say on Christmas Eve; they have shunned normal society and live on the margins, stealing - and sometimes killing - to eat.

"That wasn't necessary!" I insisted. "You could've... _asked_ for food!"

He laughed coldly. "And the wolf approached the rabbit, 'I say, could you spare me a leg of yours, perhaps?' You just don't get it, _do_ you? It's not a matter of means, but of survival. And it's part of our fun. Now, let's feast!"

-

In the blink of an eye the werewolves had adapted the house to their needs and located themselves in the large dining room. Food had been found quickly in the large pantry and carried to the heavy wooden table. It was an odd sight, the wild men seated around the glinting surface of the expensive piece of furniture, wolfing down food served on silver trays. They had not been ill-paid, the people who had lived here, that much was certain.

Of course Greyback sat at the head of the table, and I had deliberately placed myself to his right, as I faintly knew that the woman, in pure-blood families, was seated on her husband's left hand. And that was an interpretation I was not willing to allow.

When Greyback left the table, however, saying that he wanted to see what kind of spirits they had stored, I rose as well, not wanting to be left alone with the feasting men. When I followed him to the kitchen, a couple of the men snapped their jaws at me with mischievous glints in their eyes. I hurried inside the kitchen, their joined laughter raking the walls. "They don't want to... eat me... do they?" I stuttered to their leader, sending a wide-eyed look through the doorway.

Picking up a chicken leg from one of the trays, Greyback laughed and gave me a toothy grin. "The only thing about you that holds their interest is the fact you're not competition."

I frowned. "What...?"

"_You're female_," he sneered. "Lots of hungry wolves around here, you know... I'd be on my guard." He briefly looked me up and down, as if to emphasise his point. At my look of horror he burst into laughter, bit a chunk off the chicken leg and placed a heavy, muscled arm round my shoulders, assuring me, "Don't worry, girly. I'll watch out for yeh! You can be sure no stray will get to your knickers."

"Thanks... I think..."

He found a bottle to his taste in the wine cask and left the kitchen. As I was walking beside him to get to my seat, I jumped when one of the men took the liberty to slap my arse. Intent on staying calm on the outside, I sat down and kept my eyes on my plate. Greyback chuckled, most definitely amused by my distress.

-

When things got a little too _fun_ around the boys as they became more intoxicated, I decided a stroll was in its place. Being laughed and leered at was bearable enough... to some extent. The moon dawned a yellowish colour and hung eerily in the unclouded sky. It was freezing, the cold nipping my cheeks as it was still evidently winter. Thoughts drifted through my mind now that I finally allowed them to do so...

How could I ever approach Greyback and try to convince him to turn to the good side of the war? Lupin had already tried, with no success. And he was a werewolf himself. Besides, Greyback seemed to be giving me a hard time when approaching him with anything that opposed his opinions. And when, no, _if_ I finally did gather the courage for a try - would he go to the Dark Lord, turn me in? Would he... kill me?

Some day, the little voice of reality reminded me. Yes, _some day_. One way or another, this war would be the end of me.

With a heavy breath I ventured to the stables. Lanterns hanging in the ceiling gave a dim light. There were no horses in the stalls, and the soft creaking of the doors was the only sound to be heard.

Suddenly, I started with a painful gasp and stumbled to the side, grasping my left arm fiercely. Trying to steady myself with my back against the wall, I pushed up my sleeve with dreadful suspicion. What I saw terrified me... There it was, in all its horrible glory. Like ink on thin paper, the Dark Mark had seeped through the scar-tissue and resurfaced on my skin. _How_...?

"No one hides from the Dark Lord..."

The voice took me by surprise, and I frantically looked back and forth, searching for the owner.

"I even _warned_ you," continued the unknown. "And then you do something as foolish as to walk directly into his arms? Figuratively speaking, of course. But really, Halither. You should know better than to go to the _wolves_. There are several of them who would give you away, just for a snack, without a second thought. Corrupt men. Tsk, tsk, tsk... How tediously incautious of you... I had expected something better."

My breathing hitched in desperation as I still searched for this man, as the deep tone of the voice indicated it to be. Yet the darkness revealed no one. "Show yourself!" A moment of silence. Shadows shifted and the stranger came from his hide. No, it couldn't be... "_You_?"


	24. Moonlight Lunacy 24

**Disclaimer:** See the first chapter.

**Background:** See the first chapter.

**Summary:** In the dark times when the Dark Lord returned to power, he searched for new followers and wished to regain what had been lost. But did all of his Death Eaters join him of free will? Iris Halither looks back and tells her tale, and discovers a horrible truth about herself...

**Note:** The story is divided into chapters, the chapters shaped into parts. One part is seven chapters, no matter the lengths of those. Some chapters are short, some are long. That's how they were written.

**-**

**The Tale of a Death Eater  
Part IV:**** Moonlight Lunacy  
Chapter 24**

**-**

Lucius Malfoy looked much different from what I remembered. Different from what I saw in myself, time had done him good. His skin had taken a healthy colour and his hair glistened silkily, slicked back and fastened loosely a bit below the nape of his neck. He was clad in Death Eater robes, and wand in hand, his grey eyes glinted slyly from behind his white mask.

"You should have stayed in Scotland," he drawled.

"Wait... _you_ were the one who sent me that message?"

He stepped closer to me, one of the lanterns casting an orange glow upon his face as he removed his mask. "I _knew_ when you ran from my house. The entire estate is bound with anti-Apparition charms. I _allowed_ you to leave. It was quite simple to trace a note to you, really. But, I'm not one to tell my secrets. The Order would love that one... Yes... Another surprising turn you made. Dirty trick, really, for the Order of the Phoenix to get their hands on you. Perhaps they knew you'd be easy prey. How _pathetic_."

"Does he... Does _he_ know about that?" I whispered, my voice lying thick in the back of my throat.

"Not yet. But he will."

I lowered my eyes, having trouble breathing properly. It all came crashing down. "How did you know? How did you find out I was hiding in Scotland?"

He smirked. "Fenrir Greyback told me."

My eyes widened. My fears were confirmed. "But... why you?"

"Few know that I'm... back in business, so to speak. I told Greyback myself, and requested that he would inform me if he should hear anything about you. The last bit was the Dark Lord's personal orders. It would seem that you have some... unsolved issues with him."

"I'm not going back--"

"The longer you keep running, the worse it gets. No one hides from the Dark Lord. We all get what we deserve, in one way or another."

Was that sadness in his eyes? "Does Draco even know you're out?"

"No."

"You haven't _told_ him?"

"The Lord forbade me. Draco is a pawn as payment of my failure. I do not know any more than that. But I trust my Lord, and Draco knows what he's doing," he said with lifted chin.

"He's yet a child, and if the Dark Lord has something planned for him it may as well kill him! I've seen him. He's a nervous wreck. Do you intend to stand aside as told and let your son run dangerous errands?" I protested.

"I would rather take the punishment myself; but it is too late now. Draco has a job to do, and I have no say in it. That's just the way it is, and that's how it has to be."

"But you--"

"That's how it _has_ to be," he repeated firmly. His gaze was cold now as he sighed, "You have more pressing matters to worry about. And you're not making it easier for yourself by stalling it, Halither."

I lowered my gaze. "But he'll kill me," I whispered.

"Disobedience is not looked highly upon. I agree. Therefore, I can advise you to tell him what you know, what you've heard while amongst your new _friends_. I won't say it's enough, but perhaps it may take the worst. I doubt you've heard anything important, yet still... The show of honesty will do you good. And your place in the Order? Useful."

"You don't understand..." I glanced searchingly at the ground, and then turned my eyes to a window at the far side of the stable, seeing the faint colours of the rising sun at the horizon. I closed my eyes for a moment, and opened them to look back at him. "I ran to Scotland to get away from all of this. But then, meeting Greyback and a member of the Order... I didn't even get a chance. Please, just..."

Malfoy simply stared at me. He said, "I can't _just_ let you run. It would be unacceptable. I cannot disobey my Lord's commands, and I refuse to lie for you. I have my orders." His smooth voice was harsh, his words were final. In return I offered him a narrowed gaze and grinded my teeth as I drew my wand. He huffed as his eyes fell upon it. As always, he was quick with his words, "Do you honestly intend to fight me with another wizard's wand?" He clicked his tongue at me, "How indecent." The smirk had returned, as if he deemed me an unworthy opponent. Malfoy reached into his inner pocket. What he pulled out left me agape.

In the weak light of the lanterns my twelve inches long bloodwood wand with the essence of dragon scale shimmered faintly. An unfamiliar sense of attraction pulled at my heart, and I realised that I had missed it. I would never have thought it possible, being that its magic was practically useless to me. But now I felt a powerful need to have it in my hands.

Malfoy held it teasingly in one hand, loosening his fingers slightly, luring me. He knew I wanted it. It must have been evident by the intensity of my stare. Surprisingly, I came to words, if only a whisper. "Where did you get that?"

"You would like to know," he stated. "Ah, well. Dearest Bellatrix found it on an Auror's person back in Azkaban. She gave it to the Dark Lord of course, not knowing whose it was. With my orders, he handed it to me. Does it prove well enough for bait?" When he moved it back and forth slowly, my eyes followed. This seemed to satisfy his curiosity as he didn't wait for a reply.

During this, Edward's wand had gotten a strange deadweight, my hand hanging limply by my side. I needed to get my wand back. That much I knew. But to get it, I would have to come close. And I wasn't prepared to take the risk; I didn't know what he would do if I did.

"It calls to you, doesn't it? A witch should never be parted from her wand. It is a part of you. I know you can feel it. You want it so badly your mind is fighting for a solution to get it. So... why don't you _take it_?" He was challenging me now. It was obvious that he could see the conflict inside me. And with his manipulative words, Malfoy was trying to lure me.

"I have no use for it," I stated and turned away from him. I began walking determinedly towards the door, but he pulled me back by my wrist. I struggled, yet his grip was too firm and he managed to get my arms behind my back.

I could feel his quickened breath on my neck as he leaned his chin on my shoulder, peering down into my eyes. "What do you say?" he started. "Shall I take your life with your _own wand_? Wouldn't that be the perfect irony, dear Iris?" Harshly, he pressed the tip of my wand into my cheek. In response, I felt my own pulse quicken in panic, heard it beat in my ears. He added more pressure, and I whimpered at the pain. "Is that fear I see in your eyes? Yes, I believe it is. You're afraid because you think I will kill you..." He turned me around and smirked when I tried to draw away from him, his face _much_ too close to mine. His breath smelled of wine, no doubt an expensive one of that, as it wasn't an unpleasant smell. "I do not have orders to kill you; therefore I am not permitted to take such drastic measures."

I gasped, "Then what do you plan to do? You can't just take me against my will!"

I felt his hand on my left arm. He lifted it up in front of me, between us, and pulled down my sleeve. The Dark Mark glared at me, the serpent curling around itself, flicking its double-pointed tongue at me. "You accepted _this_ yourself. It binds you to a wordless oath. Or have you committed perjury, Iris Halither? I bet you lie to yourself every night, that you tell the silent listeners of your mind that none of this is your fault. 'Cause you don't like to be true to yourself, do you? There's always someone else to blame. Right now, you're blaming _me_. It makes it easier to deal with, doesn't it? Why not just accept your fate? Then it will all get so much better..."

I closed my eyes. If I couldn't see him, he wasn't there. But it was also to hold onto the tears of frustration. I was crying because he was saying what I didn't want to hear; because he was telling me what I had been denying all along. I lied to my conscience, not because I didn't want to know the truth, but because it hurt too much to acknowledge it. If I accepted the truth, it would take away the little bit of sanity I had left.

But I walked to Amelia's that night, when I should just have gone directly to the Leaky Cauldron. It was I who entered the first floor out of narrow-minded curiosity. I took a walk down Charing Cross Road and stepped into that dark alley, despite the conscience I should have had. I accepted the Dark Mark, when I should have fought and struggled and denied. I mistrusted and suspected, I lied and I cared only for my own well-being. Me, myself and I... It was _all_ my fault.

"Shut up," I sobbed. "Just... _shut up_..."

Once more I tried to break free from his grasp, but his hold tightened and made escape impossible. My hands were going numb from the blood being restrained in my wrists, both of which he kept a firm grasp with one hand. And with my blood pulsating below his fingertips, Malfoy stood completely still. It was strangely comforting, the way he held his silence. It was calming.

"There now, child," he said, "isn't that much better?"

Faintly, I noticed that he still had the point of my wand against my cheek, the pressure so weak now I barely detected it at all. But... there was something else to it. The numbness of my hands was equal to that in my cheek; in fact, my whole body was gaining a drowsy feeling, head to toe. It was more of a tickling feeling, quite pleasant. It was like every tension in my body was gone, and had left a soothing sensation and abandoned all worry. And finally it occurred to me... I could hear a voice. It was so calm, so controlled. I realised it to be his voice, the voice of Lucius Malfoy. Like a chant, it echoed in my head.

_Close your eyes_... 

I blinked heavily, once, twice. 

_Close your eyes_... _rest_... 

Rest...? What an odd thing to say. 

_Rest_... _close your eyes_... _and go to sleep_... 

My eyes were getting heavier still. Half-open, I could scarcely see Malfoy's form. It was so indistinct, getting so distant. But I knew I shouldn't sleep, though. Not now. 

_SLEEP_!

Heavy eyes. Blurry vision. World dissolving...


	25. Moonlight Lunacy 25

**D****isclaimer:** See the first chapter.

**Background:** See the first chapter.

**Summary:** In the dark times when the Dark Lord returned to power, he searched for new followers and wished to regain what had been lost. But did all of his Death Eaters join him of free will? Iris Halither looks back and tells her tale, and discovers a horrible truth about herself...

**Note:** The story is divided into chapters, the chapters shaped into parts. One part is seven chapters, no matter the lengths of those. Some chapters are short, some are long. That's how they were written.

**-**

**The Tale of a Death Eater  
Part IV:**** Moonlight Lunacy  
Chapter 25**

**-**

I came to with an overwhelming feeling of repeating my previous waking as I felt tiny droplets rolling down my cheeks. Slowly opening my eyes I wished I hadn't, a strong headache immediately pounding against my skull. The pain made me blink hard several times and white-hot sparks flashed instead of what should have been the sight of my surroundings. Successfully opening my eyes, ignoring the pain, I stared blindly ahead of me. This time it was not the werewolves playing tricks with me, the liquid appearing to be dew dripping from the rocky ceiling. But wait... what?

Sitting up, I looked around. I was indeed in the cave, lying on the furs I had slept on before. And as I turned my gaze upwards again, I found the stars glinting deceivingly down at me. So it was night again, and I must have slept through the day. Or had it only been a day? From the aching of my every muscle it would seem as though I had hibernated. Coming to consider, had the last I remembered even happened? Had it been day yet? Or was it all just a frightfully realistic nightmare? One so realistic it still felt like my wrists were in the grasp of Lucius Malfoy. Yet, lifting my sleeves to look for something like handprints, there was no physical evidence to be found.

The silence was overwhelming. Apart from the snores, there was only the soft crackling of the fire. Greyback and the others looked to be sound asleep, and so I rose from bed with that reassurance in hand. Unsurprisingly, I was in need of a breath of fresh air. Walking outside, the coldness of the weather struck me tenfold. The most of the snow had disappeared, yet the biting cold had lingered behind. What a long winter it had been! Spring was struggling on its way, only the rare winter aconite to be found here and there. Plucking one of such rare, I looked to the sky with a sigh showing in cloudy wisps.

What if life itself was a dream?

What a nightmare it then was...

A twig snapped somewhere behind me, and in quick reflexes I moved behind a tree. Sneaking a glance while leaning against the trunk, I moved to get a better look of the small clearing around the cave-entrance. Several werewolves exited, whispering feverishly to each other.

"He's out of his bloody mind, I tell yeh," muttered a younger male to an elder.

"Easy, Anthony," soothed the distinct voice of Cicero, and he appeared behind the other, placing a firm hand on the back of his neck. "Greyback suspects nothing. His senses are too disturbed by the infernal female to notice any of our doings. Once Lupin returns he shall inform us, as according to plan. No need to worry."

The mention of Remus Lupin had me startled, and I came to think of the plan I had yet to enact. Were these the men Lupin had succeeded to encourage? Most of them looked to be not a year older than myself. Surely, if Greyback found out about their betrayal, they would not stand a chance. But of course, those older, those who had stood by Fenrir Greyback since long before my very birth... they wouldn't leave his side now. They believed in him, trusted his judgement of the Dark Lord. These wolves didn't.

But, Lupin wasn't here. I was. Needless to say I felt it was up to me. And so their attention was instantly on me as I stepped forth from my hide. I gulped at the predatory smirks they conjured, but in their narrowed eyes was caution.

"Spying for old Grey, pet?" Cicero sneered.

"I am not his pet," I grounded, scowling slightly at the pun. "I'm not who you want me to be. I'm not here because of Greyback. I'm a... friend of Lupin's."

"Somehow I find that hard to believe. How can you possibly be one of the Dark Wizard's goons, be a close acquaintance of Greyback and yet _still_ be on our side of matters? No, love. That doesn't quite fit." He came closer with big strides, quickly being a mere hand's breadth away from my face. "But if you tell Greyback anything, I'll make sure it's the last thing you do."

"Why would I tell him if I'm a friend of Remus Lupin? How is it that I know Lupin is against Greyback, and that you are as well? I'm not your enemy, Cicero. Lupin is a part of a resistance group, as am I. But he isn't here now. I have come in his place."

The werewolf huffed defiantly. "I don't put any belief in wizard folk, girl."

I was tempted to comment on the fact that Lupin was one, but if they didn't know that, it could ruin everything. The thought struck me that they may only trust Lupin for the fact he had lycanthropy himself. I hadn't thought of that. "I am not here to make you believe me. I'm here to try to convince Greyback of the same Lupin has tried to. I don't need your help..."

I turned to walk inside the cave, but one of the men grasped me by the shoulder. "You--"

"_Not so fast_." The voice came from behind me, and out of the corner of my eye I saw Greyback step up beside me. He came fully into my line of sight. He glared at each of the men in turn. "Just what is going on here? Hmm?"

"Nothing, Alpha," said Cicero, his voice as steady as a rock. There was no hesitation in his movements as he approached Greyback, neither fear nor fury in his eyes as he faced him. I was clueless as to what went on inside his mind. "Just a friendly discussion about last night's events, that is all. Young Halither seems to have caught a little headache from the wine. We were just offering to find some herbs for it."

The lie was quite lame, and I hadn't really had any wine but a few sips. But as Greyback turned to look at me, I quickly feigned a frown and half-closed eyes. It made him smirk, and for a moment I worried he saw through it. He chuckled, "Come on, then. I'll fix you something strong to numb any pain."

-

He hadn't meant tea.

I was quite careful with the suspicious liquid in the mug clutched in my hands. It smelled so unmistakably like a mixture of many strong spirits, I feared taking more than one or two sips would numb my better senses as well as body. The worst part was that there had been no pain to numb, and so it went directly to the nerve centre and acted like a slow sedative. But I had to keep Greyback in the belief of my act. Yet of course he demanded I drank at least half of the mysterious substance. By that time I was more than drunk out of my mind.

In fact, somehow I ended up clutching onto Greyback's arm, pointing my finger in his face. "You know what you are? You're a reeeeeal crazy fellow... I bet you ate your own Mummy! But you know what? I ain't afraid of the big bad wolf, 'cause you're jus' a big, fat puppy..." Had I been aware of myself, the giggles clucking from my throat would've made me cringe in embarrassment. And then I would have seen the threatening eyes of Greyback's men. No doubt they wanted my head on a platter, so to speak.

Greyback was the only one who seemed to find it all amusing. Releasing the mug from my grasp he put it out of my reach. "I think you've had quite enough, girly. You'll be biting tomorrow if I allow you more hangover than you're likely to get."

With a sigh of disappointment my head dropped onto his elbow, as I was slouched over the bench. His gnarled fingers stroked through my short locks of black, and instead of repulsive as it should be, it was relaxing. Slowly, it lulled me into a deep slumber.

-

The light piercing my eyes indicated noon. Even before I was fully awake, the hangover struck. Perspiration dawned on my forehead, accompanied by stomach cramps and headache. I faintly remembered not having eaten the other day and alcohol instead of food and water caused the most sickening nausea.

From the silence I almost expected to be alone. But focusing as much as possible brought the faint hum of murmuring voices. One was Greyback. The other I couldn't discern. It would appear there was no one else in the cave; no movement was to be heard. There were only the speaking voices of the two. For another couple of minutes I nursed my pains by relaxing into the furs. It was only when I heard my name spoken my attention was drawn back to the quiet exchange.

"Has he asked about Halither?" said Greyback.

"Not yet. But I sense his impatience. My return last night provoked two deaths..."

Greyback's hoarse laughter made hairs stand on end. His humour was revolting. But it wasn't just that. I had dreadfully realised who the other person was. I pondered for a while, filtering fact from fiction, dreams from events. It was hard to do, as they all had blended together in the most horrible potion I had yet produced. I turned on my side and then lay completely still, sensing their eyes looking in my direction in cause of the movement. I succeeded in making them believe it had been a move in sleep, and with my arm over my head it was possible to watch them discreetly. They continued.

"What is it he wants with her, anyway? She seems to make one lousy fighter."

Lucius Malfoy cocked an eyebrow quizzically. "You expect me to know? I scarcely know the girl, let alone the Dark Lord's plans with her. She's run from her services twice now... I don't assume he merely wants to cage her. I don't understand how she became a Death Eater in the first place. The wrong calibre, that one..."

So they thought me weak, did they? The anger boiled in the pit of my stomach, and it was hard to restrain the words 'I am not weak'. They were so close to spilling from my lips, I pressed my mouth against my arm.

"Why did you bring her back here, anyway? I would've imagined you took her immediately to the Lord. You tend to surprise, Malfoy! Not starting to feel sympathetic these days, are you? Ruthless looks better on you."

"Pity is not a word in my dictionary. I sympathise with no one. You should know."

The comment hurt, though why I wasn't sure. A heavy air settled between the two Death Eaters. Malfoy sipped carefully of a chipped glass of wine, skilfully masking his distaste at the poor quality with a languid smile. Greyback was considering an unspoken matter, eyes squinting in thought and jaw working slowly. His lips parted in a wolfish grin.

"Seen your son lately, have you?"

Lucius Malfoy put the glass down and fixed his eyes on the werewolf. "I haven't," he said.

"He's a good boy." Greyback looked down at his filthy nails. Then he sneaked a predatory smile at the stately man opposite him. Malfoy's eyes narrowed at the playful threat.

My brow creased in wonder. What was this odd display? They seemed like old friends. Perhaps they were. They had both been in the Dark Lord's service since the First War. Why shouldn't they have connections I didn't know of? Of course Death Eaters associated with their equals! They _were_ human beings, after all.

Lightly smirking at the thought of otherworldly tea-parties, I drew in a deep breath to stifle any giggles. Dust entered my airways and I held my breath. The effort caused a tickling feeling in my throat, quickly rising to my nose, and the beginning effects of a strangled sneeze made skin wrinkle in worry. Using small inhalations through the nose as a hindrance was a pathetic attempt, and a loud "Achoo!" echoed against the cave walls. A soft gasp followed the horrifying give-away, and I shut my eyes closed as eyes turned my way. Nothing was said, nothing was heard... Silence. I hoped they hadn't realised I was awake.

I found myself reaching for the wand in my pocket. But, the handle... it was unfamiliar to the touch. Stealthily, I pulled it out and lifted it just slightly for me to see properly. My breath hitched at the sight... The dreams were real.

Let the nightmares re-enact...

-

**Author's note:** That's it. That was all the 25 current chapters. This means there'll be a break in posting. I need to write more before I can post more, right? I hope you liked the story so far and will continue to read. Big thanks go to Rock Royalty for her lovely reviews! I love hearing your thoughts. It's true when I say that reviews inspire. The more you guys share, the more I write, heheh.

To be continued...


	26. Moonlight Lunacy 26

**D****isclaimer:** See the first chapter.

**Background:** See the first chapter.

**Summary:** In the dark times when the Dark Lord returned to power, he searched for new followers and wished to regain what had been lost. But did all of his Death Eaters join him of free will? Iris Halither looks back and tells her tale, and discovers a horrible truth about herself...

**Note:** The story is divided into chapters, the chapters shaped into parts. One part is seven chapters, no matter the lengths of those. Some chapters are short, some are long. That's how they were written.

**-**

**The Tale of a Death Eater  
****Part IV: Moonlight Lunacy  
Chapter 26**

**-**

As if possessed, I was suddenly on my feet. The pressure on my chest made it hard to breathe, and the headaches made it difficult to stand straight. I blinked a couple of times before my surroundings finally came into focus. The two men at the table had gotten to their feet and were watching me.

"Well, well," said Greyback, "she wakes at last. You don't look too good, little Iris... Something the matter?" He grinned innocently - if there is such a thing - acting as if he had no idea what the trouble was about.

For a moment I just stood like the wolf's prey, looking back and forth between the two. There was no way I could outrun either of them. I could barely stand as it was. And it would be foolish to try to pick a duel with them. They would have me unarmed easily, with brute force or magic tricks. I had to wave the white flag for now. I walked to the table, well aware of their stares, and sat down beside Malfoy. Facing Greyback, I grumbled, "I could use a glass of water."

His grin widened, mixed with a bit of amused puzzlement. "Certainly," he obliged and poured me a cup which I downed greedily.

"I see you found my little present," Malfoy remarked and nodded at the wand held firmly in my hand.

I glanced down at the thin piece of bloodwood. I hadn't even realised, _truly_ realised, that it was there. It was the oddest feeling. The silly thing had never meant anything to me except being a reminder how helpless I was with magic. But now that it was back within my reach, it brought a sense of reassurance. I had never seemed to miss it, yet now I was happy to have it.

It took a moment before I became aware that they had been talking all the while. And now that they were both looking at me, I tried to comprehend if a question had been asked. My gaze shifted apprehensively. "What are you staring at?"

Malfoy smirked. "I asked what size dress you wear?"

"..._What_?"

-

He was being quite serious. The very same day I found myself escorted to Malfoy Mansion. _Escorted_ being the keyword here. It only further complicated my situation. The estate was much bigger than I remembered, resembling a mini-castle, or perhaps just a castle. I noted the decorations at the entrance. "Are you holding a party?"

"Of a sort," was Malfoy's smooth reply. "I believe you're invited," he added.

That wasn't a very pleasant surprise. "What? Why? What kind of party is it?" I rambled, fearing the answer I slightly suspected.

"Let's say a little family reunion..."

The words sent a chill down my spine. I didn't expect it would be a reunion like the kind that might be held at the Burrow, or even Grimmauld Place. A party in the home of the Malfoys could only be with unpleasant company of many sorts. At least now I knew why I would need a dress... "Who's coming?" I dared ask.

"Our kind of people," Malfoy replied easily. He meant pure-bloods, undoubtedly. Though, I wondered if I wouldn't soon be labelled a blood traitor. "And other kinds," he commented with a small glance at Greyback, confirming my presumption.

"What about Draco? I thought you hadn't seen him for some time?"

"Ah, so you _were_ awake." I cringed at my slip. "He's back at Hogwarts," he said with an air of sadness. "Narcissa's out of town. Nobody's home but the servants and myself. All is clear."

"Why did your wife leave?"

The ghost of a smirk crossed his thin lips. "There are certain of my friends she doesn't... care about. Neither will you, I imagine. But don't worry; I expect Greyback will be keeping a close eye on you." He opened the door with a brief, "_Serpent Skulls_," and stepped aside to allow me and Greyback to enter.

"What's that supposed to mean?" I said, feeling a bit panicky.

Greyback chuckled. "It'll be very male company, little one."

I stared. "Just how many women are we talking about?"

At their identical predatory looks, I wasn't put at ease. "With Bellatrix Lestrange and yourself... two," said Malfoy. "There aren't many female Death Eaters. I only know of the two of you, personally, but there are a few others. Most women who support our cause do so in other ways."

I didn't ask what other ways they contributed than through money and words of trust, but it hung in the air.

-

The thought of escaping crossed my mind several times. It was the _doing it_ part that was difficult. The fact that Greyback stalked me wasn't helping. Wherever in the mansion I went, he followed. It was unnerving. His chase wasn't right out obvious; he walked far behind me, and when I would look, he was doing something or another to cover his track. But it wasn't normal for the man to look at paintings.

Finally, when I decided to go to my room and he was _still_ following me, it was enough. I stopped in front of the door and turned towards him. He walked casually up beside me. "Hullo," he greeted with an ear-to-ear grin.

"What do you want?" I stressed.

"Why, I don't know what you mean--"

"Don't play me for a fool, Greyback. Why are you stalking me?"

He shrugged. "Malfoy's orders. Wants to make sure you don't make any trouble."

"And why would a big, bad wolf like you take orders from him?"

Greyback glared and stepped closer. Despite how I'd 'gotten used' to him, his size was still quite intimidating. The feral grin added to the _pleasure_ of being under the large man's scrutiny. "It's a favour among friends," he sneered. "I don't know what you're getting at, but you can't pit us up against each other. Malfoy an' I share an... _understanding_... which has been around longer than you have." His smile widened. "You should be careful, little one. You're playing with the big boys now."

I watched him back away and walk down the corridor. "Feels like I've been playing that game for a long time already," I muttered and finally entered my room.

-

Several hours later the guests started arriving. I had decided to stay in my room until I was called for, but I could hear the loud popping of Apparition and the shuffles by the fireplace echoing in the halls. I was surprised the 'wanted' Malfoy would dare allow Apparition in his home. Perhaps it had been limited in some way. And I knew the mansion was Unplottable, so perhaps that added to security.

The chatter in the main hall rose in volume and almost became shouting as more people arrived. I would have blocked the noise with a spell, if only-- well, no more need be said. The thought made me bring out my wand. I thumbed it curiously, wondering if it had always looked that... _beautiful_. I glanced up. The dress was beautiful too, but in a different way. Malfoy had requested I wear it. Apparently one of his wife's old dresses. Thank Merlin; I wouldn't have been able to accept something Narcissa usually wore. Or worse, something he'd bought for me.

I stood from the bed and carefully stepped closer to the chair the dress was laid out on. I'd never seen such expensive fabrics, except on pure-blood visitors in the Ministry. Narcissa Malfoy had excellent taste, something I'd never afford to have. The already shabby sweater and faded... _demmins_... proved it.

I glanced at the mirror across the room. What about my hair? The black locks had grown considerably the last couple of months, and I looked like something the cat (or wolf) had brought in. And wouldn't make-up be appropriate? I didn't really know any Beautifying Spells, and even if I did I'd probably end up with a horrible result. But first things first. It took me almost ten minutes just to pull the dress on, in fear of crumbling it in any way. Bear with me; I'd never owned anything of value, except my wand. But when I finally managed to fit into it properly, there was the problem of closing the tiny clasps in the back... and tying the ribbon that was supposed to go around one's middle.

"Beautiful..."

I shrieked at hearing a man's voice and pressed the front of the gown tightly against my chest, since it fit quite loosely on my body untied, and turned to stare at Greyback. "What are you doing in here?" I said breathlessly. I could feel a fierce blush creeping up my neck.

After taking the liberty to give me a once-over now that my front was towards him, Greyback looked at me with a mischievous glint in his eyes. "I was sent to see what was keeping you," he said formally. I held tighter onto the top of the dress when he stepped closer. "Want a helping hand?"

I took a deep breath, thinking that was the last thing I'd want from him. Nonetheless, I offered him my back. "If you think you can help me," I quipped. I stiffened when I felt his tarnished knuckles brush against the skin of my lower back. He moved swiftly at fastening the clasps, and it made me wonder just how many dresses he had assisted in putting on... or taking off...

Glancing up at the mirror, I found Greyback's reflected gaze staring back at me. He pulled back the ribbon and tightened it with a flourish that made me gasp with the sudden pressure on my ribcage. "Done," he said and took a step back.

I turned halfway to look at his work. The ribbon had been tied into a pretty bow. "Who taught you?" I asked interestedly.

His eyes shimmered briefly with what seemed to be a fond memory. "I've helped my mother often enough when I was a boy..." He cleared his throat to regain composure. "Now come," he said and offered me his arm, again with a wolfish grin in place, "let's join the party!"

-

**Author's note:** I know a lot of people refer to the Malfoys' home as Malfoy Manor. But since it has never been mentioned as a manor, I figured to use the used term. Quote: _"...subjected to fair and objective evaluation," said Mr. Lucius Malfoy, 41, speaking from his __Wiltshire mansion__ last night. "Many of us with our children's best interests at heart..."_ This mansion in Wiltshire is what we've all come to know as the Malfoy Mansion. I don't know who thought to call it Malfoy Manor, and I do actually like that term better, but it's just never mentioned that way. If it's the American term, I wouldn't know, I read the original British versions.

Thank you again to my lovely reviewers:

**Katja:** Thank you very much. I hope you've enjoyed the ride so far, with much more to come!

**Rock Royalty:** Yeah, I would've liked to see more Greyback in HBP too. That's why I try to make up for it here, lol. And yes, of course I couldn't keep Lucius away for too long. He was getting grumpy backstage... And as for Voldy, well, you'll have to wait and see, won't you? Muwahahahah...!

**krachum:** It all came to me one September morning - well, actually it was evening, and the plot was completely different back then, but ANYWAYS - and I knew I had to write a Death Eater fanfic. There are so few as it is, and they're all either about Malfoy (pick which one), Snape or Bellatrix. And just like that, Iris popped into my head, and her tale followed soon after. Thank you for reading and reviewing!

**terrorofthehighway:** Thank you for your suggestions. I pondered it over, but decided not to repost. It was a good idea, but I thought it would be a shame for my reviews (and my hits). Even though it would be wonderful to get more reviews, I'm very happy about the ones I get. And I'm not writing for fame, but love the appreciation. But thank you for caring, and big thanks for reading and reviewing!

Now, as a last note, I told you reviews inspire. They inspired so much that chapter 27 has reached about 2500 words! How about that? I don't know what came over me... But anyway, what do you think? What could happen at this party? Who'd show up? Let me know what you think! I'd love to know what's on your mind... Not that I'm a brain eater or anything... xD Oh, and please don't flame me for the shortness of this! Think about 27 being long!


	27. Moonlight Lunacy 27

**Disclaimer:** See the first chapter.

**Background:** See the first chapter.

**Summary:** In the dark times when the Dark Lord returned to power, he searched for new followers and wished to regain what had been lost. But did all of his Death Eaters join him of free will? Iris Halither looks back and tells her tale, and discovers a horrible truth about herself...

**Note:** The story is divided into chapters, the chapters shaped into parts. One part is seven chapters, no matter the lengths of those. Some chapters are short, some are long. That's how they were written.

**-**

**The Tale of a Death Eater  
Part IV:**** Moonlight Lunacy  
Chapter 27**

**-**

It's amazing how many things can be said with the fewest of words. As soon as my feet left the last step of the grand staircase, Malfoy approached me. Heads turned just by his mention of my name. From that moment, I knew I couldn't go unnoticed. And even more disconcerting was the fact that I was one of the only two females in the crowd. Even stranger was that having Greyback by my side actually made me feel just an ounce of safety. It made me unaware of the fact I hadn't let go of his arm.

"Hungry?"

It took me a moment to comprehend the question, and my eyes hesitantly moved from a group of men to Greyback. "I... no... No, I'm not hungry."

He lifted a bushy eyebrow. "When was the last time you ate?"

Looking away from him again, my eyes shifted carelessly. "Don't know." A low growl rumbled from his chest, and I glanced briefly at his narrowed eyes before finally moving out on my own. It was only a second before I lost myself in the crowd. I noticed a stark difference between the Ravenclaw blue of my dress and the dark greens and blacks around me.

Without pause, I strode past the buffet tables and moved towards the breeze coming from the open doors leading out to the balcony. The cool wind that covered Wiltshire in a light blanket made the small hairs on my bare arms stand on end, and I wished I had acquired a cloak or at least a shawl. When I reached the stone-banister of the balcony, I strained my neck curiously to see if I might be able to see the Stonehenge I had once heard about in Muggle Studies.

A deep voice sounded behind me, "There isn't any secret trapdoor leading out of this place, if that's what you're hoping to find."

I turned to find a woman standing in the dark in the corner, a cigarette elegantly balanced between two of her fingers. The black dress barely visible in the opening of her heavy cloak indicated she was not seeking attention, and she blended perfectly into the shadows surrounding her. "You must be Bellatrix Lestrange," I said.

"And you must be _Halither_." When she stepped closer, the light from the nearest window caught her pale face, and I instantly recognised her from Azkaban. Bella from Azkaban. I had forgotten all about that, for the moment. "Your escapades have become quite the subject of gossip, even in the _inner_ circles. You should be proud; it took me several affairs to get to that point."

"My escapades?" I asked quietly.

Bellatrix laughed coldly. "You have run from your services. Twice, even. Not many survive that. On the other hand, not many are under the protection of Fenrir Greyback."

I frowned, "Greyback's not protecting me."

"Oh?" She was closer now. "Perhaps the Dark Lord believes his little charade for you, but I don't. The werewolf could've caught you and brought you in long ago. Though he's got a thick head, Greyback has a... _talent_ for cradle snatching. Such a little thing as you should be no hard sweat. No, I think he's weak for you, Halither. Though," she paused and looked me up and down, "I don't see what charms you might possess. Then again, he's always had poor taste."

I scowled. "Anybody ever tell you what a horrible person you are?" I didn't allow her the time to respond. I stalked back through the glass-door whence I came and once again delved into the crowd, hoping to get truly lost. This time, I paused by the buffet. The food should have looked delicious, but instead it made my stomach churn. What was wrong with me? I never had any hunger...

Again I moved past the buffet and mingled even deeper into the crowd... Crowd... I keep calling it that. There probably weren't as many as I believed. But numbers didn't exist in my head, all I saw was a blur of people, of faces I didn't know, or knew too well. I couldn't see Greyback anywhere. But finally, I spotted Malfoy. I was about to approach him when I saw who were in his company. The one I took most notice of was Dolohov. After all this time, he was one of the persons I wanted the least to get in contact with. I'd have to wait. I snatched bits of the tedious chit-chatting. They changed subject constantly. Not until the conversation was brought in a different path did I really pay attention.

"When will the entertainment be, old friend?" required Dolohov.

"The Dark Lord won't be arriving until after dinner," said Malfoy. I froze and turned my head slightly to cast a sidelong look at him. He didn't just say... I opened my mouth, tried to speak, but no words would come out. Malfoy saw me. He excused himself from the conversation and strode leisurely in my direction. "Come," he muttered under his breath and gallantly hooked his arm with mine, "this is not the place to talk."

I barely noticed where he led me, and didn't speak until he closed the door of the pantry. "Tell me you were joking," I almost pleaded.

It was a moment before he turned from the door. With a flick of his wand, the small space was lit up by dimmed orbs. "I wasn't."

"He... He's coming? Here? _Tonight_?" He nodded. "Why didn't you warn me?!"

"Compose yourself," he snapped. With another flick, he cast a Silencing Charm on the door so no one passing by would hear. When he looked at me again, he wore a disbelieving look. "You didn't think I wouldn't report you to the Dark Lord, did you? I have my orders, Halither. That I should bring you here tonight, however, was the Lord's idea, not mine."

Heaving a deep breath, I plumped down on an upturned bucket. My eyes slid along the floor, and then I looked back at Malfoy. "What's going to happen to me?"

His face was still impassive, but the cold eyes softened. "You remember what we talked about in the stable?" He sighed and smoothed a hand over his elegant ponytail. "I advise you to be as humble as you can find it in you. Give him what you've got to offer. Try to tell him what he wants to hear. Then maybe, you'll live through this night unscathed."

"_Unscathed_," I huffed.

"Admittedly, you'll most likely get a bit roughened up round the edges. You're lucky if that's it. It could be much, much worse. If possible I'll entreat him to let me do it. I won't be as harsh."

"You make it sound like I'm going to trial." Instantly, I remembered when I had first met Malfoy in Azkaban. He had enlightened me of how differently we would be treated, that for us there was no trial, only endless time. Ha, I'd given him my porridge...

"This time," Malfoy cut in, reminiscent of the very same, "...this time you are."

-

I couldn't remember the last time I'd taken a breath. As air now forced its way down to my lungs, hissing past my lips, I thought I must have gone blue in the face. As time passed, I felt the glances sent my way coming more frequently. What were people waiting for? Deep down I knew, but then I didn't really know. It seemed my fate lied in the hands of the man towering proudly just a few inches to my left. Did Malfoy sense I would run if he didn't hover around me? The more I thought about it, the more I agreed I would. Well, _try_, perhaps.

A glance at the large grandfather clock in the corner informed me it was rounding close to midnight. No wonder I was becoming more agitated. It had been almost three hours. And the closer the elegant minute hand came to the gold Roman number on the ivory face, the more people seemed to appear. I hadn't realised how many there actually were; they'd spread throughout the mansion.

I noticed Greyback prowling my way, and through the corner of my eye I spotted Bellatrix finally appearing in the door to the balcony, dropping her smoke to the floor and ceremoniously crushing it with her high-heeled shoe. Was something supposed to happen at midnight? The silent listeners of my mind urged me away from that thought... But when the chime stroke twelve, I was jerked right back to face the reality of my fears.

"_Showtime_." I hadn't seen Greyback come up behind me, and the rough sound of his voice directly next to my ear almost made me jump with a sensation of imaginary icy claws running down my spine.

The grand fireplace suddenly became ablaze with a tongue of green flame. It seemed all other light had been vanquished, and I looked around to see the fire reflected on a crowd of white faces, white masks. I knew I wasn't breathing. I couldn't. The black smoke that poured from the flames were only weak vapours, and that wasn't what hindered my breathing... It was the sight of what was uncoiling from within the flames.

Enveloped in clouds of black fabrics, the Dark Lord stepped forth from the hearth, straightening into his full height. As the remaining whispers of fire died out, the bone-white colour of his skin gleamed eerily through the darkness. A deep breath slithered through the slits of his nose, filled the entire capacity of his lungs, and released in a deep sigh.

"Home of the Malfoys," the Dark Lord said, with deliberate slowness, and paused. "How long since I came last. I believe..." He gave the crowd a sweeping look and focused his eyes on a single Death Eater, without any hesitation, as if discerning the man's identity even through the mask. "I believe it was for your ceremony, Snape." The Death Eater didn't speak, but bowed, inclining his head with respect. The Dark Lord turned slightly to his right, at last looking at Malfoy.

I glanced at Malfoy through the corner of my eye, feeling unable to move, and saw that he too wore his mask. With dreaded horror it appeared to me that I was the only one unmasked. And so, when the Dark Lord's eyes moved unresponsively from Malfoy and to me, I felt an immediate stab of fear.

"_Halither_..."

The way my name brushed against his tongue brought me a reverberant glimpse of the past. When first I had stood before that dark creature, I had been unaware, unprepared, for what he was. I hadn't known. He had been but an unspeakable legend, something that only lurked in the past. I had had no idea what he was capable of. When I was marked, I had only thought of escape, I only wanted to get as far away from those crimson eyes as possible. And my encounters had only been brief. Three short meetings. They were nothing compared to standing before him now, alone and afraid. Now, escape didn't even cross my mind. I only hoped to live through the night.

Before I could comprehend what happened, he was in front of me. With a firm grip of my wrist, I had suddenly been cast to the centre of the room. I stumbled by the force and fell to my knees and hands on the hard marble floor. Faintly, I heard the clicking of his shoes as he approached me, and I raised my head to look up at his slowly approaching form.

"You have been away for a long time, dear Iris; I almost came to miss you... Did you enjoy your little taste of... freedom?" In one long stride he was right in front of me, and with a hand on my left shoulder, he twisted his wrist to lift my arm and slid his fingers down to cover the scarred skin along my lower arm where the Dark Mark had resurfaced. His eyes softened into an almost fatherly gaze, and something between a smirk and a smile formed on his lipless mouth. "I should have known - when I marked you - that you would not understand..." It was a moment before he continued, and another deep breath passed through his nostrils. "That you would not understand how it... _binds you_ to me... For those who run... cannot hide..."

When his eyes slid from the mark to my eyes, I gasped at the sudden intrusion as the tips of his mind merged into mine. The image of Dumbledore in Grimmauld Place surfaced, and I responded to the memory with a naturally connected thought of Kieran, and an image of him interfaced with the other. The Dark Lord firmly guided me back towards Dumbledore, but now only the Headmaster's face, those blue eyes, was at my mind's eye.

With a jolt back to the present I once again found myself gazing up at the Dark Lord, whose before almost caring face had transformed into a snarl, serpent eyes mere slits of a glare. I whimpered when the nails of his hand dug into my arm, into the sensitive tissue of my scarred flesh. Quickly, faster than a flash of lightning, his expression changed once more. It was like a calmer air had suddenly come over him, and his barred teeth disappeared inside his mouth. The scowl was still there, but not as fierce. Another deep breath, and finally, he spoke.

"I should have known that a _fool_ such as _Albus Dumbledore_ wouldn't hesitate to take you under protection. The old man didn't do so well, did he? You are here, now... in my mercy. Do you think me merciful, Iris Halither...?"

The question left me breathless. For a moment, I thought that nothing could be the right answer. What could calm a martyr, a man - thing - who fed on the suffering of others? Malfoy had told me to say what he wanted to hear... But what was it he wanted to hear?

"DO YOU?!" His yell echoed against the walls, and even more so inside my mind. Did I? Did I think him merciful? I had no doubt he wouldn't hesitate to kill me, should that be his wish. No, I didn't think him merciful. And yet I knew that wasn't what he wanted to hear. My mind warred between if I should speak the truth, or lie to please.

Looking into the Dark Lord's red eyes, it hit me: He was a Legilimens. It wouldn't matter if I lied; he would see right through me. And Malfoy had also said that I should be honest. And that made the whole difference... Even though it could mean my death...

-

**Author's note:** So the Dark Lord returns. You didn't think he was gone for good, did you? Of course another confrontation was inevitable. Iris _has_ been a bad girl after all! xD Nice length this one, if I shall say so myself. Longer than my average at least, almost 2500 words.

I would absolutely love to know what you guys think about this. Especially Voldemort - am I keeping him in character? Please, if at any point you feel like someone gets OOC, do tell! And I hope you all enjoyed and will keep reading. Next chapter stirs up some of the past, and Iris learns some dark secrets about her mother... So, stay tuned!

Feedback is useful, and reviews inspire. What you have to say is important to me, so if you have anything on your mind, I'd love to hear it. Much love to you all! ♥ Huge thanks to my lovely reviewers:

**Rock Royalty:** Without cliffies, how would I keep you clinging? Yeah, I was wondering how to make a smooth shift of subject to the otherworld party planning, but obviously, if Iris was to wear a dress he'd need to know her size, lol. Turned out your intuitions were right though, eh? "Lord Thingy" did turn up, fashionably late, heheh. And about Greyback... I guess we'll never find out! As for if Iris fixed her hair and put make-up on, no, she wasn't really in the mind to ask, which you might understand... Anyways, as always, thank you for being such a wonderful reviewer! Hoping to hear more from you. :)

**Katja:** No, I don't expect they would be the party type. xD But you must remember, most of these people came from high society, so if there's a chance to humiliate someone who wronged their Lord, they'd do it in style! Thanks for your review, darling.

**Kc:** Thank you for reviewing, hope you liked this new chapter. I'll keep writing, so I hope you'll keep reading! Cheers.

**Becky:** Thank you so much! Your amazing review had me blushing. Being the responsible writer, of course I had to update immediately. You were lucky to find me in the corner of being ready to post, heheh. I hope you'll like the character development in the next chapter, and think that I'm still keeping everyone in character. If not, don't hesitate to bash my fingers!


	28. Moonlight Lunacy 28

**Disclaimer:** See the first chapter.

**Background:** See the first chapter.

**Summary:** In the dark times when the Dark Lord returned to power, he searched for new followers and wished to regain what had been lost. But did all of his Death Eaters join him of free will? Iris Halither looks back and tells her tale, and discovers a horrible truth about herself...

**Note:** The story is divided into chapters, the chapters shaped into parts. One part is seven chapters, no matter the lengths of those. Some chapters are short, some are long. That's how they were written.

**-**

**The Tale of a Death Eater  
Part IV: Moonlight Lunacy  
Chapter 28**

**-**

I felt certain awe at the emotions that filled me. I felt a growing boldness, a need for defiance. For once, just for once, I wanted to be true to myself. He was right. Those who run cannot hide. I wouldn't hide; not anymore. Now I wanted to fight. Fight for my soul and the good that was left in me. I had to believe in what was just. He didn't own me. I didn't belong to him. The words stumbled from my tongue. "I would never think you merciful. You're a murderer, you have no mercy, and I won't dwell on the idea of your mercy. I betrayed you... I betrayed what you stand for... I can't lie about what I did. I can't make excuses. And you already know. You've already made up your mind about me... I have nothing to offer you."

The Dark Lord stared at me for many long moments. I couldn't decipher the thoughts that ran through his head. Would he pull out his wand at me next? I had no idea. And for once, I didn't really care. It was the lack of response that held me still... waiting... But when he unexpectedly moved away from me, and laughed, I was truly at a loss. It was not a joyous laughter. It was cold, cruel... disbelieving. He circled around me, and my eyes immediately spotted the wand hanging loosely in his hand. He seemed as if wondering what to do with me.

He stopped. He was now in front of me again. I was startled when he spoke sharply, "So you have nothing to offer me... You do not even wish to beg for your life? Can it be that you have finally accepted how worthless you really are? You are the last of your line, and yet you do not care? Should I be impressed?" He laughed shortly once more and stepped closer to me, placing the tip of his wand under my chin. "Or do you think that because Lucius told you to be honest that I will find you brave? You insult me, and you tell me there is no use in you... Rather pathetic... even for a Halither..."

I didn't speak. I hardly even breathed. My skin burned where his wand touched me, almost as if I could feel all of the dark magic the simple piece of wood had performed. What was the essence? The blood of a virgin? A bone from a newborn child? I wouldn't be surprised if it was either.

The tip of his wand lit up and shone into my face, and I blinked at the sudden brightness. I cringed when he ran his fingertip across my left eyebrow with a strange gentleness. "You have your mother's Ravenclaw eyes," he said.

My heart skipped a beat. What would _he_ know about my mother...?

The Dark Lord removed his finger from my face and suddenly fisted his hand in my hair. I gasped at the pain and watched with wide eyes as the short strands began to grow between his fingers. The black colour appeared to fade, and was replaced with my natural dark-blonde. I kneeled before him now with the truest of faces. There were no masks. He smiled, as if reading my mind. "You look more like your mother than you know. And you are very much like her. Though... She was weaker than you." He backed away while still looking at me, and echoed the words, "She was weaker than you..."

I had my eyes fixed on his slowly retreating form, tremblingly waiting for whatever was to come. What was he going to do? Just briefly after having finished that thought, the Lord voiced the single most feared word imaginable.

"_Crucio_!"

I screamed. The pain was almost intolerable. Every bone in my body seared at the core and I was tempted to think that this was it, that I could only take so much. But as soon as it had started, it passed. The pain dissipated and left my muscles too exhausted to keep up my weight. I couldn't even sit up, but just laid there on the floor, beaten.

"Do you remember your mother?" it sounded from the Dark Lord. My heart tightened with the realisation he was not yet giving up on the painful subject. I shook my head, even though the motion must have been minimal. "She was so much like you... yet was still so different..." He came into sight, standing just a few feet away from me. "She never took the mark. No, she promised me something much _more_ valuable than her services, something she has yet failed to give. A son. Her son. Someone to take her place in my forces." Again he laughed, and I registered chuckles from other Death Eaters. "Until the day she would bear a son, I would not call upon her. For many years the Halithers have been known to only give birth to bastard children. A line of unmarried women giving birth to daughters. I had obvious doubts that she could keep up her end of the bargain. So when I came to her home... and saw _you_..."

"You killed her," I spat.

The Dark Lord grinned, a sight for sore eyes. "You think too little of me! I told her that for her failure, I would accept your death. Apparently the life of her only child appeared more important to her than her known. She was willing to die at my hands for you, little Iris. She loved you so..." The words came harshly from his lips. "I am not as _charitable_ to let anyone pass their rightful punishment. Simply by her death I would gain nothing." He circled around me like shark to prey, the persistent look in his eyes intensifying the red gleam. "I gave her a curse. A bodily pain that would pass to her successors in time with her eventual death."

"My mother was poisoned," I whispered. "She didn't die 'eventually'."

"I grieve your loss," the Lord sneered, a statement I didn't believe for a tick. "...Rise." It took me a moment to understand what he meant, but he said simply, "Get on your feet, girl." I tried but couldn't move. He motioned with his hand, and an invisible force pulled me to my feet. Still shaky from the Cruciatus Curse, my knees buckled, sending me back on the floor. He continued, "I am curious. It is long ago now since your mother passed away... Have you been feeling the pains yet?"

"What pains?" I snarled. He pointed his wand at me sharply, and I cried out when my insides clenched in intense pain. Even after he removed his wand, the pain lingered, throbbing deeply somewhere inside me. I heaved and heaved for breath until I spat blood on the floor. I stared at it in shock and looked up at the Dark Lord through unshed tears, wishing for just a moment to see pity in the man's eyes. There was none.

"Don't get clever with me, Ravenclaw. Though your mother was a fool for a woman, she knew not to ridicule _me_. She was too afraid, and wisely so. But in the end, she feared not for her own life, but yours."

I stared up at him and laughed ruefully, wiping the blood from my chin. "Then she wasn't afraid of you, only of what you could do." I barely had time to see the flash of anger in his eyes before he kicked out. It was so unexpected I couldn't avoid it, and the blow landed sharply in my side which was already sore and bruised from the various assaults.

"Don't... test me..."

I closed my eyes and rubbed my tender ribs, grateful nothing felt broken. My ears sharpened at the sound of rustling cloth. I heard a soft command from the Dark Lord, and tensed when rough hands grabbed both of my arms and lifted me from the floor. I opened my eyes cautiously and caught sight of the Lord leaving the hall with billowing robes, Lucius Malfoy close at his heels.

Weakly, I tried to resist when the two Death Eaters holding me started to pull me along, but soon my feet dangled uselessly behind and they had to drag me down the corridors. We reached a heavy wooden door leading to the levels below, and with the assistance of Levitation I was guided down the stairs, surprised they took enough care instead of simply pushing me down the steps.

I shivered at the stale air that bore a resemblance to that of the Hogwarts crypts. The cave-like stonewalls were decorated with condensed water dripping down from the ceiling, and I tried to remember the patterns in chance of escape, but lost count. Though however endless the dungeons of Malfoy Mansion seemed, I wished they had been longer when my escorts stopped in front of what appeared to be my destination.

The squared walls formed a space scarcely big enough for four grown men to be lying down. The tiny, enchanted window situated just where the cave-ceiling met the far side wall was a mocking reminder of those in the Ministry of Magic... But the bars to the cell merely brought Azkaban to mind...

The smaller of the two Death Eaters grabbed a key from within a hidden space that appeared as just another brick in the stonewalls outside the cell. He shoved it in the lock, and as soon as it clicked and the door was opened, the bigger man pushed me inside. My fatigued limbs brought me down hard, and I looked up to see the door locked once again, followed by the hasty exit of the two.

I managed to crawl my way over to the far left corner upon entry and lifted the skirt of the dress below myself as a makeshift blanket. Shivering with the cold seeping up from the floor and wafting inside the cell from the corridor, I drew my legs up and hugged my knees to my chest, not bearing notice to the scratches and gashes they had gathered. My eyes stung at the pains everywhere in my body, and brokenly I buried my face in my knees... I cried myself to sleep.

-

I don't know if the days came achingly slow, or if they passed me by. It felt like weeks. In the damp cell it was difficult to tell the difference between the colours of day and night seeping in through the small, foggy window. It didn't matter. Every day had the same schedule. As of the moment, I was expecting dinner to be served soon.

I stared ahead when a tin bowl was dropped unceremoniously to the floor and pushed between the bars. The Death Eater stood his ground when I didn't move to take it. I didn't care. A growl resounded in the empty space and sent a shiver through my chest. "_Eat_..." Greyback's gruff command didn't affect me. "Eat!" he repeated.

"Why do you care?" I whispered dejectedly.

"Why don't _you_?" The soft timbers of his voice surprised me. I finally looked him in the eye when he crouched down directly in front of me. There was an uncharacteristic sadness in his wolfish yellow orbs. "Why have you given up?" he grumbled.

"What is there to stay alive for? I'm not getting out of here any time soon, I suspect. Better get it over with before the Lord remembers me... I don't feel like becoming sport." The sarcasm had become a well-known habit. If any of them were to front me, I hurriedly dismissed them as soon as possible. A brief remark was the most effortless weapon. It was the first time I had seen Greyback, however. I knew he would need the longer version. What I hadn't accounted for was his trying to make conversation.

He brought one leg beneath himself and leaned an arm against the knee of the other. His smile seemed fake, a small twitch of expression. "I asked the Dark Lord if I could keep you as pet. Make you a part of me clan, p'raps. There are more, you know. The wolves you met were made up as a mere group. A small troop, if you will. There are women and children in the bigger packs. Thought you might like it better than here..."

"And what? Have you turn me at the next rise of the loony moon? I think not. I'm not made for your kind of life, Greyback. I'm not a _beast_ like you..." I paused at his look of amusement. Joking, was he? I should have seen it coming. Scowling, I looked elsewhere. My eyes curiously travelled his large form at the sight of the odd robes he was wearing. Death Eater robes. The last time I had seen those on him was on the night of Emmeline Vance's death. They still seemed uncomfortably tight, showing off his size even more... and not in a good way.

"I'm here on my own accord," Greyback stated. "The Lord requested my presence. New orders, as it were. That and Lucius invited me for dinner and entertainment." The grin that tainted his lips told me I wanted to know nothing of what had transpired to entertain the two of them. I hoped dinner and entertainment had not coincided in any morbid way.

"And you offered to feed me," I added bitterly.

"Well--"

"Halither..."

Speaking of the devil. I looked up to see Lucius Malfoy standing in front of the cell, garbed in almost imperial robes accessorised with a serpent-headed cane. There was a certain predatory gleam in his eyes that I was almost certain meant more trouble for me. If I wasn't so expectant of hearing what he had come to say, I would have gulped with trepidation.

"The Dark Lord wants to see you."

-

**Author's note:** I'm so very sorry for the long wait! I've been quite busy lately, but I hope you find this chapter made up for it, maybe. It should be noted that FanFiction will now be my main site for my two major stories, seeing as I will be going to a new school from August 26 and won't have much time to update. I'll be living on the school, so I don't think I'll have too much access to a computer in my spare time. I will continue to post the chapters in the artwork versions on Quizilla, but those posts will be delayed.

♥ Thank you so much for the amazing reviews!

**Rock Royalty:** I hope the past of Iris' mother made you think... Just what happened to her to bring her mother to the Dark Lord? Will her mother's past inflict her future? And then there are still the mysterious circumstances of her unresolved death... Thank you for reading and reviewing, hope you still like what I'm writing!

**Becky:** I'm glad you think I'm keeping the Lord as his 'malicious, control-freak, Muggle-hating' self. If I'm lucky, you still think that about this chapter? And no, there's nothing effusive about your comments. I'm so much of a perfectionist that just a little acceptance comes a long way for me. So you can imagine how happy your reviews make me!

**Katja:** Nah, he won't kill her... yet... maybe... perhaps... Heheh, I'm not telling. And as far as romance, it does seem to have been very absent in poor Iris' life, huh? I guess you'll have to wait and see whatever happens. In terms of a romantic relationship between Iris and Greyback... well, I'm sure the wolf wouldn't mind! Lol.

**Kc:** Thank you! Did this satisfy your curiosity, or do you need more? Hehe.

**Becky Belle:** In fear of mixing any names together, I have to start with asking if you would happen to be the same person as the anonymous Becky? Anyway, I sure hope I managed to get this post out soon enough and you didn't actually starve yourself? I couldn't possibly live with myself!

**cyberelf:** Hi Elfy, welcome to FanFiction! Hope you'll like it here, and that you liked this chapter. I'd love to hear more from you. Cheers!


	29. Breaking the Bonds 29

**Disclaimer:** See the first chapter.

**Background:** See the first chapter.

**Summary:** In the dark times when the Dark Lord returned to power, he searched for new followers and wished to regain what had been lost. But did all of his Death Eaters join him of free will? Iris Halither looks back and tells her tale, and discovers a horrible truth about herself...

**Note:** The story is divided into chapters, the chapters shaped into parts. One part is seven chapters, no matter the lengths of those. Some chapters are short, some are long. That's how they were written.

**-**

**The Tale of a Death Eater  
Part V: Breaking the Bonds  
Chapter 29**

**-**

Malfoy's grip was unyielding. There was a change in his posture I hadn't seen before. His shoulders weren't slouched nor his steps frantic, as they had been during the escape in Azkaban. And he did not look tense and cautious as he had upon the return to Malfoy Mansion. In his stride there was a daring confidence, back straight and shoulders stiff, and his facial expression was one of pure arrogance. He was not a broken man. He was an emperor.

I wondered about it for many long moments while he forcefully dragged me down the corridors. My hands were clutched around his arm, as I was trying to keep on my feet as much as possible. Dignity didn't seem to be granted. My muscles continued to protest at every movement. When I stumbled for the third time, I realised something when Malfoy hauled me up again. It was the flicker of disgust in his eyes.

"This is the real you, is it?" I hissed at him.

He stopped for a beat and looked down at me. "I don't know what you mean," he said, almost laughingly, and began walking again.

"This is who you really are. You're not some pretentious father and husband, or a withering, piteous creature. Hell, you're not even a mere messenger of your betters! You're one of them... You're just like the lot of them, and I hadn't even realised--"

"Oh, _spare me_ your drabble, Halither. Your opinion of me is irrelevant, and I'd much rather be without."

Despite knowing he had sold me out, more than once, I had maintained some belief that a small part of him felt _something_ towards me. Now I wasn't that sure. "I thought you were my friend..." The words were spoken with an icy drawl that seemed to make him pause in his relentless quest on bringing me through the dark dungeon corridors to wherever our destination be.

Malfoy stayed still and suddenly pulled me in front of him to face him directly. The look in his grey eyes I recognised from just before the Dark Lord's arrival; that small, barely-there trace of pity. "It was foolish of you to think you could trust me, Iris. I am a Death Eater. I do as I am told, to any extent. My situation is staggering as it is. I can't fail my Lord, not again... Not for you... You're on your own. That's how it has to be. And frankly," he added with a slight huff, "you're not worth the effort either way."

I kept staring at the side of his face; hopeful that the coldness of my stare would hurt him physically if I did it long enough. I had been brutally reminded of my early years on the street - no one was to be trusted. I felt utterly ridiculous. How could I have put my faith in that man? Him, of all people? He wouldn't help me if it meant his own head on the line. But then, could I blame him?

When we stopped again, my eyes finally left Malfoy's form to roam the rough surface of a large wooden door adorned with a number of complicated locks connected by a system of enchanted chains. There was the faint sound of voices inside, muffled by the thickness of the door.

Malfoy drew his wand and lightly tapped the door at a random point. The voices stifled at once. A moment of stillness. Then, just as quietly, the chains on the door slithered away. Malfoy didn't move until the door was opened and a gaunt witch appeared through the thin sliver that became visible of the room inside. "Evening, Bellatrix," he said formally.

Bellatrix Lestrange's eyes narrowed into mere slits as she looked at her brother-in-law. Her dark gaze then wandered to me, and a twitch in one side of her mouth passed as a smirk.

"_Let them in_,_ Bella_," a voice spoke from somewhere inside.

The woman pulled the door back just a tad more. Unconsciously, I tightened my grip of Malfoy's arm as he pushed the door open the rest of the way and trudged past Lestrange without further acknowledgement. A quick glance around the room inside didn't reveal the Dark Lord. I wasn't relieved. He was there. I could feel him.

"You may leave."

My eyes snapped to the left, where I was sure his voice had come from. I still didn't see him.

Malfoy bowed, seemingly to no one in particular, and left with no hesitation. The door closed automatically at his departure. My eyes returned to the only moving object in the room. Lestrange circled me slowly; chin lifted and bottom lip protruding in a pout.

"That means you as well, _Bella_," came the chilly cue abruptly.

The dark witch's thin brows lifted in outraged surprise. "But my Lord--!" She cut off with a yelp and clasped her left hand with her right. The hand was cuddled to her chest when it turned a pinkish red, as if stung by a silent jinx. "Yes, my Lord," she intoned more quietly, and reluctantly withdrew out of the door as well.

The atmosphere of the room changed rapidly; at least before the attention had been divided. Now I was alone. The silence lengthened while my heart beat against the cage of my chest, vibrating against my ribs and pumping the blood steadily through my body. Every small sound caused a panicky jerk.

To distract my mind from the awkward situation, I focused my attention on my surroundings. There was a grand fireplace with an eerily clean grate in the left side of the room. Fiery red flames flickered between the heavy timbers now and then and cast a blood-red glow around, blackening the various green colours that decorated the sparse furniture. An old, velvety armchair stood askew facing the hearth, resting on a threading carpet with intricate patterns of green, red and black, with a touch of outlining white. The end of the carpet brushed against a desk of dark wood with no chair accompanied on the seated side.

I glanced behind me and saw a couple of cupboards, cabinets and bookcases scattered along the wall on each side of the door. Facing round again, I glimpsed movement at the far end of the room, close to what appeared to be the contours of a bed with another desk to the right of it and a door to the left.

"Sit..."

I jumped at the soft command. I looked around me and did not feel obliged to obey when I realised the only seat near me was the lone armchair. It felt wrong. And just then I jumped again when a simple wooden chair materialised out of thin air and fell with a rickety drop down on the edge of the carpet. I glanced up and around. Still no sign of him. I refocused on the chair and moved closer to it, mindful of any sounds to be heard. Cautiously, I stepped around it and finally sat down. As soon as I did, iron clasps burst out from the wooden arms of the chair and snapped around my wrists. I gasped and flexed my hands, testing my bonds. I was trapped.

My breathing accelerated at the soft sound of movement behind me. Cloth brushed against one side of my bare legs, but when I looked there was nothing to see. I jumped for a third time when fingers wrapped around my right shoulder.

"I hear you have not been eating. For how long?"

My mind reared at the question. For how long hadn't I...? Why did he want to know? "What does that have to do with anything?"

He pulled at my hair and yanked my head back against the hard back of the chair. Now I saw him. There was nothing to divert my attention from the red orbs peering into mine. "You do not question me," he purred, "you tell me what I want to hear. For how long have you not been eating?"

"I don't know," I replied honestly. When was the last time I had finished a full meal? I had no idea. I never really thought about it. But I still couldn't help but wonder at the oddity of the unusual question.

"It would seem, perhaps," the Dark Lord continued idly, turning his head slightly to the side like a curious owl, "that you have been enduring symptoms of my curse for longer than I've thought."

I frowned. "You mean to tell me I haven't been eating... because of what you did to my mother...?" My eyes widened. I exhaled sharply with realisation, fingers tightening around the armrests, anger striking me suddenly. My neck corded and strained against the chair's sharp edge. "My mother died of a mysterious internal bleeding... She was healthy; there had been no sign of any illness... That was it, wasn't it?" Bitter tears pricked my eyelids. "It was because of the curse!"

The Dark Lord was watching the anger rising in me with a strange interest. Even through my rage, I didn't miss the quirk of a smile at the corners of his lipless mouth. "It is likely," he said with morbid fascination. Perhaps it hadn't been part of his plan. If it hadn't, the small twist seemed only to amuse him.

"And..." I continued weakly, "...and I will die of the same."

The Lord finally released his grip of my hair and took a small step backwards. "However undetectable, you are stronger than your mother was. You have given cause to various reasons I should have had you killed. And yet I haven't."

"Why?" I asked, needing to know now, once and for all.

Like before, he brushed one long finger softly across my left eyebrow in an eerily gentle gesture. "You are a dying breed, Iris Halither. Pure-blood families are becoming increasingly uncommon with all the soiled blood in the world. And more, some still insist on becoming traitors, and should not be considered true wizards. Many would agree your family is another case. But yet, your mother served me, if to a lesser extent. And now you..."

"But why me? What do I have to offer you? I have been nothing but trouble. I am not a Death Eater, I never will be."

He chuckled, seemingly better-knowing. "I never expected you to become one. But like your mother, you have other qualities. You are capable of advanced potion-making. I am lacking in that department for a time."

I blinked. "What about Snape?"

"Severus is occupied at Hogwarts teaching younglings Defence Against the Dark Arts. But the... production of such important liquids, in times of warfare, cannot be halted in his absence."

I had no time to consider the extraordinaire bit of information that Snape had gotten his infamous and long-denied wish of subject to teach, as what appeared at the front of my mind was the hinted terms that involved me. I turned my head, glaring tensely at the Dark Lord as he walked around me, at last entering my line of vision. I said finally, "And if I refuse?"

His lipless mouth parted in a grin that could only be affixed as pure malice. "You have no choice."

-

**Author's note:** Funny thing happened. This Hinkypunk jumped out of the toilet and guided me away from the computer... Yeah, for three months. You'd be surprised how alluring they can be! Nah, truth be I've been suffering from something of a writer's block and a bad case of laziness, with a bit of busy-as-a-bee to go with it. Plus for the past two weeks I've been in sickbed. Not very eventful, mostly weird dreams and too much TV. But anyway, I decided that this chapter had been lying around for too long, so might as well get it out there. Hope you liked it better than I do. Let's pray the writer's block will get over with so I can start writing some more!

By the way, I turned seventeen October the 13th... hint hint...

♥ Merci beaucoup, my adorable darlings:

**Becky Belle:** See? I haven't abandoned you! Teheheh... hope the email for this one didn't give you a heart attack? And as flattering as a Top 8 place on MySpace would be, I'm glad on your friends' behalves that this is just a mere FanFiction story. But now that we brush against the subject, not the story, but I am in fact to be found on MySpace. It's the "web: Homepage" link thingy in my profile, check it out if you like.

**Kc:** Glad to hear 28 pleased you, did you enjoy this as well?

**Rock Royalty:** No, darn it, I haven't yet read the book! Half the globe, correction, the entire WORLD must think I'm a freak. Maybe I should stay away from the computer whilst I'm sick and get on with the last half of HBP so I can start on it soon? Then again, don't suppose you wanna wait another three months, lol.

**Katja:** I wouldn't get too cosy with him for too long, that's for sure. I know he might seem a bit out of character, but let me tell you this: Is it possible that I think he is slightly human beneath the surface, or is he perchance just playing the wolf in sheep's clothing? Keep reading and reviewing, and you might find out!

**Nerio:** "The Dream Team", lol, that would just make Greyback's day. Can I use that? Heheh. Well, thank you for reading, if you came this far to read this. Thanks either way!

**art drawn by vomit:** I actually tried getting it out around your birthday when I heard, but don't know what happened. I guess the chapter wasn't quite finished back then, and I just kind of forgot about it since. Then I tried getting it out for my birthday, but that didn't work, lol. No pitchforks, eh?


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